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Page 78 text:
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| School Books • • • AND SCHOOL SUPPLIES For every grade in every school. ! •• We Buy and Sell Used School Books F. E. OSBORNE t 112 Eighth Avenue West Calgary Patient: “Doc., how can I cure myself of sleeping with my mouth open?” Doc.: “The trouble is incurable. Your skin’s too tight, so when you shut your eyes your mouth opens.” Willie: Teacher, which is right. Bill or William?” Teacher: “Why William, of course.” Willie: “Wouldn’t it be funny to see a duck walking along the beach with a worm hanging from his ‘William’?” Joe: “What did one drop of cream say to the other?’ Mary: “Let’s go over to the corner and curdle.” Boss: “Take the cat out of the room. I can’t work with it making a noise like that. Where is it?” Billy (grinning): “You’re sitting on it, sir.” Fireproof Storage Shipping Long Distance Moving Reliance Storage and Cartage Co. H. Fairbanks, Prop. Residence L1024—Office M1066 1001 1st St. East, Calgar Success depends on a good appearance. Be well dressed from fabrics sold at . . . NIPPON SILK CO. I We carry complete lines of J Silks, Woollens, Cottons, Rayons. 76
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Page 77 text:
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Sally: “You have such a smart overcoat that I cannot under¬ stand why you have such worn-out trousers.” Joe: “How in the world can a man get a new pair of trousers in a restaurant?” Jim: ‘‘Have you seen a boy around this corner with one leg, named Fred?” Tim: ‘‘What was the other leg named?” Scarboro Confectionery 1716 17th Avenue West Phone W4369 FREEZER FRESH ICE CREAM PALM BRICKS TRY OUR NEW COUNTER 75
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Page 79 text:
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QUALITY CLEANLINESS NATIONAL MAID BREADS - CAKES - PIES Always Oven Fresh National System of Baking Limited FRIENDLINESS SERVICE Department of Prevarication Expeditions that poke into isolated lands couldn’t find explor¬ ing conditions much more rigorous than Nicholas Stumpf, of Lincoln, Ill., did right on his own farm. “Winds kept blowing with terrible force from the mouth of a cave,” Stumpf relates, “and they were so strong that they kept every one from exploring it. I tried bucking the wind, but couldn’t stand up, so I put curry combs on my knees and crawled up to the mouth. It was no use, though, for when I turned on my flashlight the force of the wind blew the light beam right back out at me and I couldn ' t see where I was going.” “Waiter, there’s a fly in my soup.” “The poor thing must have lost its balance. It was sitting on the edge of the bowl when I brought the soup in.” “The other way down, madam,” called out the street car con¬ ductor as the portly charwoman was descending at the driver’s end. “You’re mighty fussy now there’s a war on,” grunted the erring one, as she turned around and started down backwards. COMPLIMENTS OF MACLIN MOTORS LTD. FORD and MERCURY Sales and Service 77
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