Stuarts Draft High School - Legacy Yearbook (Stuarts Draft, VA)

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One of the jokes of our school. COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS TOUGH COVER After the collection hat was passed the pastor saw that it was empty when it was returned. Slowly and deliberately, the parson inverted the hat and shook it meaningfully. Then, raising his eyes to heaven, he exclaimed fervently: I thank thee, Dear Lord, that 1 got my hat back from this congregation! SORRY, BUT . . . An actor who was pretty much down on his luck once asked comedian W. C. Fields for a loan. “1’cl be glad to help you my good man,” replied Fields, “but my money’s all tied up in currency.” FATAL 400 Nurse: “What are you operating for Doctor?” Doctor: “$400.” Nurse: No, you misunderstood me. What I meant was what does the patient have?” Doctor: “$400.” Doctor: “Did you take that bottle of pills?” Patient: “Yes, but I don’t feel any better. Maybe the cap hasn ' t come off yet.” NO CONTEST Two men went after the same cab. After a short discussion one of them returned to his wife at the curb. “Why diil you let him have that cab?” she asked. “He needed it more than I did,” replied her hus¬ band. “He was late for his karate class.” OBLIGING Hobo: “Kind sir, could you help a poor man in trim hie?” Passerby: “Sure, what kind of trouble do you want to get into?”

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Coach Hale enjoys another exciting Draft Assem¬ bly . . . 11 Stuarts Draft has always been a place of high intel¬ ligence. Here, two typical students, enjoy playing with their Crayolas.

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Another “funny” joke at S.D.ff.S. BETTER HALF The club had scheduled a husband-wife Scotch four-ball tournament and the club champion ap¬ peared at the first hole, a notoriously tough par four, with his wife, an even more notoriously bad player. He hit his drive. A beautiful shot, 275 yards down the middle. When they got to the hall, his wife hooked it deep into a clump of trees. Unperturbed, he played a brilliant recovery shot which rolled to within three feet of the pin. She in turn hacked the ball 18 feet past the hole in almost unsinkable distance. Without a murmur, he lined up the long putt and managed to sink it. As they walked to the next tee, he remarked, “We ll have to do better than that, that was a bogey five, you know.” “Well don ' t blame me,” she snarled, “I only took two of them.” WORRYWART On a city bus one evening, a woman was bothering the driver every few minutes to remind her when to get off. “1 low will I know when to get off?” The bus driv er could not resist the opportunity. “By the big smile on my face, lady.” YOU DON’T SAY Minister: “I hope you won’t charge too much to fix my car. I am a poor preacher.” Mechanic: “Yes, I know. I heard you last Sunday.” A FINAL TOKEN Be thankful you live in a country where you can say what you think without thinking. 13