Stonewall High School - Confederate Yearbook (Clearbrook, VA)

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Laugh and the World Laughs With You Upon learning that a certain doctor in town charged five dollars for a first visit but only two dollars for the second, a miserly old man decided to save money by pretending he had already been to sec the doctor once before “Here 1 am again. Doc,” he breezed as he sauntered into the- office. “I’m afraid I don’t remember your face,” re¬ plied the doctor. “Hut how are you feeling?” ”1 don’t feel much better.” complained the pincy-penny. Then continue the prescription I gave you last time for a few more weeks. And that’ll be two dollars please!” Lady of the house: “Have you given the gold¬ fish fresh water today?” Maid: “No, Ma’am. They haven’t finished what I gave them vest rday.” “Those people in the apartment above won’t give me a minute’s peace. They were still up at two o’clock this morning jumping on the floor and making a terrible noise.” “Kept you awake eh?” “Well, not exactly. I was still up practicing my saxaphone.” Mrs. Kersey : “How do you feel after your ride on the horse?” John: “I didn’t know anything filled with hay could be so hard.” Mr. Winfrey: “This sentence, My father had money, is in the past tense. What you you be using if you said. My father has money?” Anna: “Pretense.” bachelor: “What an adorable baby you have, M adam.” Proud Mothejf. “Tha-nk you. Do you know, he’s only seventeen months old and has been walk¬ ing for nearly nine months now!” bachelor: “Really! He must be exhausted. Isn ' t it about time he sat down?” Young girl: “What beautiful fresh flowers you brought me! Why I believe there is a little dew- on them.” boy: “Yes. there is, but 1 promise to pay it off tomorrow.” Dot: “Why can’t a bicycle walk?” Peggy: “1 give up. Why?” Dot: “It’s two-tired.,” Mr. Demon was speeding along the highway one day when a state trooper caught up with him and made him pull over to the side of the road. “What’s the meaning of exceeding the speed limit,” asked the trooper. “Well you see,” replied the driver, “My brakes are bad, and I was in a hurry to get home before I had an accident. Man (standing in the middle of a busy street): “Officer, can you tell me how to get to the hospi- States, a carpenter was being examined in court. Policeman: “Sure, Just stand where you are.” Jean: “I’ve changed my mind.” Thomas: “Well, does it work any better now?” Dad: “Who was your mother talking to for an hour at the door?” John: “It was Mrs. Smith. She said she didn’t have time to come in.” After applying for citizenship in the United tal ?” He answered all the questions correctly as to the name of the president and capital. Then the official asked. “Could you become President of the United States ?” “No,” w r as the reply. “Why not?” persisted the official. “You please excuse,” begged the carpenter, but I am very busy right now repainting houses!” — 80 —

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t COMPLIMENTS OF The Virginia Woolen Co. | Winchester, Virginia — 82