Stoneham High School - Wildlife Yearbook (Stoneham, MA)

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THE AUTHENTIC. 5 various views were presented to me, I may say it was like tlie kinetescope views only much more distant and not always moving. I made a note of the views that I saw wh ich I will endeavor to give you. After getting my eyes adjusted to the machine I found that I was in a strange place and by var- ious signs as I seemed to he passing through the street I knew that it must be tliat I was in the Philippines, and this was no other than the scene of Dewey’s victory, Manila. The city was in gala attire, some great event evidently was about to take place. I seemed to move with the throng until I came to a magnificent building and I seemed to enter. It was only too plain that this was the inauguration of a governor. I waited and I hardly could believe my eyes that the person on whom all eyes rested, the governor, was no other than my classmate, LESTER TARBETT, a man of magnifi- cent and portly bearing. It was evident that his popularity, as well as his size, was immense. I followed the throng and later found myself at, what in Washington would be called the Inaug- ural Ball, and there to my amazement I found the master of ceremonies and the centre of an admiring throng of women was — would you believe it? — ERXEST PATCH. His swallow-tail and white kid gloves were something which we had never seen him sporting, but in those, as well as with the bevy of ladies, he was very much at home. .Just as we seemed to be leaving this foreign city a sign board caught my eye. It was the familiar barber’s pole and an equally familiar name, GEORGE RUSSELL MAXN. Could it be so? I stood for a minute wondering if it could be my old friend, when I saw a little child in front of the door crying, and sure enough it was “Turk” who came and picked up the little urchin and quenched his tears with kisses. As this scene vanished I could see in the dis- tance a large field. .Vs the view became more dis- tinct I could see tents and various wagons indicat- ing that a circus was there. Through an open tent flap I saw the cages of the menagerie In a distant corner was a crowd of people following a guide. As I looked they stopped before a cage containing some animal, but as 1 looked closer I noticed this placard ; — “Wild Max, C.uiOHT IX TiiK .Tuxolks OK riiK Mi-yriiOPOLriAX Pauk Sysi ' km ok Eastkux Mass.” Well, this was getting interesting and quite near home, so I fixed my eyes more intently upon this cage When the wild man lifted his head I saw, — well you know “Bob” CONNORS as well as I do, — and there he was as large as life. The manager of this show was Mme. Dudevont in name, but in reality was BERTH.V GERTRUDE WALKER. Recovering from this lively scene I found my- self in the midst of a crowded city. This I recog- nized immediately as Boston, for there was the Common and the Subway Station. A Salvation .Vrmy lass was busily talking with some dirty-faced Italian newsboys, and something about the girl attracted my attention. I nearly fainted and had to call for water for there was: — well, I always expected FR.VNCES would do better than that But what I saw next was pretty near the limit There out in the middle of the street was “Hick” MELLETT sweeping up garbage. He must have worked out in the rain quite a lot for his hair was pretty rusty. We always expected great things from H.VRRY in the musical line, as he was con- sidered, by himself, authority on anything musical, hut here he was wielding a broom instead of a baton. As this scene vanished there gradually came into view what I took to be Broadway, — Saugus .V fifteen or twenty story building loomed up before me, wholly occupied by the firm of HINCHCLIFFE , McGovern. This I knew from the immense signs blazing from every story. .V retail store equal in size to a half dozen of .Iordan, Marsh Co’s I saw no doors. I seemed to advance with the crowd. Among the many strangers I recog- nized one, a hustling, rustling, bustling woman, here, there, everywhere and back again in an in- stant: — yes it was our classmate FLOR.V . NNIE THtHlNTON. “Well ten years works wonders in the 20tii Century,” thought I. I now saw that it was bargain day. A placard ; “Great Assortment of Babies in Basement,” attracted my attention. Moving in that direction, at my left in the Ribbon department was “Mid” GREEN. Here she was fairly buried under an avalanche of her favorite red and yellow ribbons. But to the basement Babies? I should say. It was the greatest sale you ever saw. Cradles? No Incubators by the hundreds. “BLONDES” at one counter “BRU- NETTES” at another Black and white, and all the scrambling, pulling and pushing that one sees on bargain day now. Flere was a card; — “$3.10 and Carriage Thrown in ” Farther on prices ran down to “Three for a Quarter,” evidently a shop- worn lot. This flourishing department was in charge of ALONZO P.VRKS. One more familiar face in this establishment It was that of ST.VCEY

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4 THE AUTHENTIC. to the world j ' ouiig women titted for a useful, iutelligent life, prolicieut in an occupation by means of which tliey can lie independent of otliers, or to wlucli tliey can turn in time of adversity. Already we liave an institution of lids type in Simmons College, Boston. Here young women may prepare for sncli positions as nurse, matron, private secretary, lilirarian or liorticnltnrist. Tliat young women are looking for just sucli a scliool as tliis is sliown liy its ever-increasing nnm- ber of students and liy its rapid growtli Tlie success witli wliicli tliese princiiiles of education liave met, is tcaciiing us tliat true educa- tion sliould develop industrial elHeiency as well as moral ami intellectual power, and with this educa- tion will come that fuller develoinnent which will make both man and woman more able to take part in the making of a better and happier world. Anmk ' rilOUNTON. CLASS PROPHECY. F ob more than a year now, the attention of the whole world has been directed to that nation, which np to this time has been consiilered of little importance, but has shown most wonderful ability, in holding at bay for many months the great power of Russia. Such wonderful foresight as the .lapanese have shown in prepai ' ing for this war is the admiration and wonder of military men the world over. From our interest in the war we have naturally become interested in everything relating to this in- genious people, who have in so short a time shown that they are to be among the great powers of the woi ' ld. This may explain why, when ])assing through Boylstou Street a few days ago, I was attracted by a beautitul .Tapanese shop-window. .Vs I stood gazing at the vases of curious workmanship and tapestries with gold and silver embroideries, it oc- curred to me tliat I might learn more about these interesting people. I found inside a very courteous and intelligent .Japanese gentleman, who was wil- ling to satisfy my curiosity in regard to the many beautiful and Ingeniously wrought objects of interest. Naturally our conversation turned to the war and J asked him if he could give me any idea as to the secret of the wonderful success of the .Taininese. “Certainly, I can,” he answered, “though few of your countrymen know anything about the mar- vellous Invention by which my peojile have been able to foresee the purpose and movements of the enemy and thus make preparations for this war.” Drawing aside a curtain in the rear of the shop he invited me to step in and insjiect this machine by means of which a vast amount of useful knowl- edge had been gained. “This,” he says, “is the (jerinc.ashakdurimah- yah. This instrument I found resembled externally the old fashioned stereoscope, but was connected by electrical wires to a wonderful globe which had many needles and registering cards. But the most wonderful thing about this globe was the time question, unlike anything I have ever heard of. By a wonderful combination of the time and place indicators he said that one was able to see what a person or a people at a given place would be doing at a given time in the future, and thus I saw how the .Japanese had been able years ago, to foresee the movements of the liusslans and thus make ready for this war. “But,” said I, “will this machine work here now?” “Certainly,” said he, “without doubt.” “.Vnd could I have the use of it for a few minutes?” “Most certainly.” I ' ’inding that the terms were not beyond reach of my purse I engaged his services for a brief period. When he asked me at just what point on the surface of the globe he would place the needle I at lirst thought I would say Washington, but upon second thought it occurred to me that I miuht test the instrument nearer home and I said, “Set it at the Stoneham High School.” This I found, with a little information from me, he was soon able to do, even to the point of getting Itoom 13 of that building. He then asked me at what date he should set the indicator. “Why UtO.o,” I said. “llK). ' )!”he repeats, “but sir, onr instrument can give any date within one hundred years.” “Great Scott!” said I, “will this instrument tell me what these peoi)le in Itooin 13 are to be doing at any date?” “Certainly, Sir,” said he. “Very well, then give us I ' .H.T.” Soon the machine was in motion. Sealed at a little table, my .Japanese friend operating at the globe, such a panorama was unfolded before my astonished eyes as I can well believe I sh.all never again obseia e. To give yon some idea of the way in which the

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6 THE AUTHENTIC. FINNEGAN selling shoestrings on the installment plan, with pink stamps on Tuesdays. The ne.xt scene took me to one of the snl)nrhs of New York. Far in the distance an automobile was approaching. As it drew nearer I conld see white ribbons flying everywhere and old shoes dangling on behind. wedding, sure enough,” thought I. “I wonder who it is?” Well, if I am not greatly mistaken, as one is liable to be at such a rapid glance, there in the back seat was M.VRY STEVENS and,— THOMAS McFAIlTLAND. With J.VNE LEWIS for chatleur, as they wheeled out of sight I wondered how the .Judge came to give his consent. And now I seemed to have dropped down into some educational estaldishment. A sleepy looking set of men were evidently supposed to be listening to the learned professor, who, though now with white hair, was DIOGENES ARISTOIMIENES ALCIBIADES GRANT, D. D., L. L. D., ,T. C. 1). The only person who was wide awake was a re- porter seated at a table, PE.VRL VIN ' I ' ON. But the most familiar scene that the .Tap showed me was in onr old High School, somewhat the worse for wear and somewhat battered. 1 saw in the office, where we have been in the habit of ■seeing Mr. Emerson seated, EDWARD BRADY, “(’hick” was bald headed, with spectacles on his nose. Can you imagine “Chick” rushing a fresh- man to the door and tell him not to come back until he had seen the committee? As the dill’erent rooms came into view, who should we find washing dishes in the lunch room but MABEL BANKS WILSON, the very girl we had supposed would astonish the world in Grand Opera. Evidently she became so attached to the teachers during her High School course that she never could leave them . In the gymnasium, (a much needed addition presented to the town l)y the Class of ’0.5) I saw VIOLET DEL.VNO giving a lesson in physical culture, instructing the young ladies how, by phy- sical means if necessary, to have a ready command of. and how to handle unruly husbands. From appearances, her training in the play had helped her greatly, and may she have great success in this new vocation. By various signs it appeared that Domestic Science was the principal thing now taught. (I couldn’t help thinking how much better tliis was than French and German, for in this case the girls would l)e likely to do all the studying.) This de- partment was in charge of .lULI.V DI.MOCK, who, by diagrams on the board I saw was giving a lesson on the maloderous subject of sewerage. Lying upon a desk I noticed a huge volume upon “The Life and Times of Russell Ervin,” a second Andrew Carnegie who, instead of founding libraries, founded asylums for spavined athletes. The author’s name looked quite familiar, being LOTTIE PARKER HUTCHINS’ scientific mind must have taken a queer turn, for the next scene showed him running a macaroni factory on the side of Mt. Vesuvius. Not seeing any boilers around I tried to see how he got all his hot air. Well, I found that it was com- ing out of immense pipes that went into the side of the mountain. “Hutch” was prol)ably still on the hunt for a girl when his money ran short and this is where he happened to settle. He probably wasn’t very lonesome, for I no- ticed BERTHA HINCHCLIFFE and DANIEL POORE i)asting labels on “Hutch’s” macaroni boxes. Dan’s tongue looked as bu.sy as ever, but just now, instead of relating that little experience with the C C. C , he was lapping labels. From sunny Italy to icy Greenland was a cinch for this machine, for I was now looking at a great field of snow. Far in the distance I could see three men sitting in the shade of a pole, evidently the North Pole, fauiiing themselves and eating ice cream. From pictures in magazines I knew that one of these men was Lieutenant Peary, and the others, well, they were a little more familiar, as they were CHAREIE NEWHALL and CARL SY- MONDS. “Nul)y” had probaf)ly got frozen out some nice line evening and had taken Carl along with him to pacify him in Ids moments of grief. Things began to melt and soon I was in the Bowery, New York. Coming along the street I noticed a nice, large, plump girl with a basket over her arm. I saw that she was selling hair firushes, which reminded me of a little incident in the life of one of my classmates who, I believe on one occasion got all she wanted of a hair brush, and perhaps a little more too — and lo, this was Sue ROLLINS herself, who was now peddling brushes for a living. A click of the machine and I thought I was in Patch’s laboratory, for it resembled that establish- ment greatly, but a big signboard soon put me wise. This is how it read : — “Ai.r. Sours oi’T.viN i icn Monky Fitmig.m kd Hkuk.” ,I()U D. Rockkfku.ki!, Founder. Tiiom. s Russki.l Svmmks, Pres. Eihki. .losKPinxi? DnuKKU, Sec. They probably started in this business with the money presented them in the play, but Ethel’s n.ame is still DURFEE, as we see by the sign.