Stewardson Strasburg High School - Comet Yearbook (Strasburg, IL)

Page 30 text:

l Qhe Hourglass - Jeanne Bridges, pioneer female in engineering, hoped to span the huge canals ,with the latest thing in bridges . This new phenomenon is an invisible bridge, designed so as to preserve scenic beautiy from unnatural mechanisms. June Robison, the well-known orator, planned to study the slanguage and ,dialects of 3Mars. Her career, she feels, depends on the mastery of the ,native speech..Her second intention is to run on the Republican ticket for ,Justice of the Peace-just as soon as she is able to explain to the Martians her political platform. . , . V Q , Butch Doehring'sl reason for trekking Marsward was to organize the Mars Athletic Association Cthe'MAAl. He intended to emphasize basketball-because of the vast possibilities for rebounding. You remember Butch Doehring as that re- markable lad who learned to make field goals before he learned to walk. Red Tull announced that she was to pursue ay scientificstudy of the red atmosphereon red hair. She recently concocted a new type of Shampoo, ,especially for redheads. It is known commercially as Firewater . Miss Tull's close associa- tion lwith Betty White disclosed their intention of exploiting the movie possibili- tiesof the 'tBetty White Scandals . Miss White is at present, America's No. 1 Pin- Up Girl-so called because of her strange up-swing hair-do which requires only a single hair pin to keep it in place. i Ruth Dearman, disappointed in her latest love affair, hoped to put as much space as possiblelbetween herself and the man of her broken dreams. She also decidedto aid Clara'Mae Beals in the writing of her new novel- Mars and the Man .VMiss Beals skyrocketed to Mars in order to obtain authentic local color. Gail Spannagel joined the company to sell subscriptions to the Poultry Magazine to any friendly Martians who would thus help her to get funds for her college educationL Miss Spannagelphas for the past few months been attending an exclusivepagricultural college in Death Valley, California, where she is major'- ing in poultry and minoring in alfalfa. f Bob Ragan had no choice but to become the eighteenth member of this dar- ing adventure. Because his family had reached unheard of proportions, and the housing situation in the states had grown steadily worse, Ragan departed, for Mars to become the first homesteader on the wonder-planet. His family will follow him at av later date. He has informed them quite recently that he has staked out fitaclaim in the western part of the country. His estate will be called the Ragan anc o . A t ,Then trip is purely a colonial venture, a scientific experiment and a project ofexploration. The eighteen souls who have so courageously faced the peril of thepplanetsdeserve ,the highest praise. It' will soon be possible to contact this pioneer party through television. The first in command, Gene Hiatt, broadcasis from Mars thirty times daily, sponsored by the 'Mars Candy Bars. Listen ing his yodeling commercials are something new in advertising. l 6trasburg Community jvfigh School - 1946

Page 29 text:

Qhe jiourglass SENIOR CLASS PROPHECY May 1, 1966 Always with a flair for the spectacular, the Class of '46 decided to end all this quibbling nonsense about Mars and go.see for themselves. With the aid of atomic energy, radar, rocket ship and Republican County Superintendent of Schools, of Shelby County Illinois inamely, W. H. Wilsonl-they shot off into space, piloted by that handsome daredevil of the ionosphere, Gene Hiatt. Gene needs no intro- duction because his courageous undertakings and breath-taking adventures have made front-page news from here to there and back again. But for the benefit of those people who cannot read, we are only too glad to announce that Heroic Hiatt's latest novel performance has been the remarkable feat of parachuting out of a plane without a parachute. He always lands on his feet. Hiatt's timekeeper Calso world-famed two-timerl, Joyce Hiatt, insisted on a plane with twin motors. Eimekeeper Hiatt announced that they would reach their destination within three ays. Herb Collins, popular radio crooner of W.D.Z., agreed to make a personal con- cert tour for the Martian barbarians. It is the current belief that the Good Neigh- bor Policy can be carried out with Mars through an understanding of national music. This is also the firm belief of our Democratic leader, President John T. Middlesworth. After all, look what the Conga has done for Pan-American relations. Herb plans to introduce the Martians to his latest dance called the Humdrumba . To relieve the tension of the emigrants, Conductor Collins serenaded them with his swing version of Pass the Biscuits . Immediately, Olive Krile, the able cook, came strutting down the aisle, throwing a rapid volley of biscuits at all seventeen passengers. Olive, you remember as the creator of the popular, platter- sized hamburger. She plans to open up chain restaurants on the planet. She has a long list of indentured waitresses back in the states, awaiting the call of the wild. These fortunate females will become the civilizing agencies in the new world. Already they are known as The Krile Kids . The ship zoomed into Mars exactly on time. After Ruth Dearman had led the group in Fifteen Rahs for the two Hiatts, Lona Doehring leaped out-the first to set foot on the fiery red planet. She scorched her toe, so she changed her toeless sandles for a pair of clogs. As Emogene Kircher was a little homesick, she quickly looked for the Sun which was only 141,500,000 miles from Mars. As night descended, Dorothy Wilson, noted astronomer, observed through her trusty telescope the two satellites called Demos and Phobos. Miss Wilson has pre- dicted a rapid migration of people from Earth to Mars. These emigrants, she says, will represent the youth of the country. She states that the three moons, visible in a Martian sky, and all at the same time-offer undreamed of romantic possibilities. Meanwhile, back in little old New York, a startling news flash, coming direct from Mars, electrified the public. Tobe Kircher. with the aid of a race of super- men, had begun construction of irrigation canals. His extensive ditch-digging career between Strasburg and Stewardson has helped to prepare him for the great work which he has thus far so nobly advanced. Vera Ulmer, busy with drawings showing intersecting lines of great geo- metrical exactness on the planet, was planning to baffle her contemporaries by publishing her work. She was also aiding Tobe Kircher in figuring out just what should be irrigated. 6trasburg Community Wigh Qgchool - 1946

Page 31 text:

Qha Hourglass SENIOR CLASS POEM Four years ago in '42 The Freshman Class was quite a stew Their voices rang from door to door And no-one knew what was the score. Herbert Collins is a handy tool Around the good old Strasburg School. Tobias Kircher with eyes so bright Takes the Chevie each Sunday night. When P. E. comes he's right on the beam With his throttle open and plenty of steam Delbert Doehring who's tall and slim, Is usually found in the Dulling Gym. At basketball he's a pretty good shot, When it comes to girls he's on the spot. Now comes Bob, the farmer's son, Who keeps Myra on the run, In my opinion he's a pretty good boy And is made up of the real McCoy. - Lona is a slender dame At getting beaux she's won her fame. Emogene and Lona are always together Makes no difference what the weather. Francis is a little short But is never on the B. B. court. Now Gail's here and Gail's there, But never found in an easy chair, And Gail's as sharp as any tack, And's sometimes driving her father's hack Dot Wilson lives out on the bus route And for the boys does not give a hoot. But on over East is a little gal, When she sees a boy she raises a howl. She never lets one out of her sight And now you know it is Miss White. Now if you see a girl driving a Ford V You will soon know the girl's Jeanne. She comes to school in her brother's shirt And winks at boys and tries to flirt. Perhaps you've heard of the Ulmer lass Who doesn't worry if she will pass. Now we come to sister Joyce Who, of course, is my only choice. Clara Mae Beals is a little shy, But will make the grade if she will try. Dorothy June who is always rarin' Is very fond of Gene Von Behren. Olive Krile, as you know, Will surely find herself a beau. She studies hard the whole day long And merrily sings the Honey Song. Farewell to good old Strasburg High, The Seniors bid you all good-bye. -Gene Hiatt iL QStrasburg Community High Qjchool 1946