Stevens Trade High School - Stevensonian Yearbook (Lancaster, PA)

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ITem VI. To Mr. Livewire Wilds and Mr. TV Weicksel, we bequeaTh one auTomaTic Tool- boy who can Turnish The shop sTudenTs wiTh everyThing Trom annunciaTor wire To boTTled elecTriciTy. ITem VII. To Dr. Jekyll I-lower, our super-chem insTrucTor, we bequeaTh The use of our bodies as guinea pigs Tor his experimenTaTions in discovering The cause of The disease, No-STudy-iTis. Also To The aToremenTioned,we wish To presenT Tour years' renewal subscripTion To The The Mad ScienTisT wriTTen by FrankensTein and Wolfman. ITem VIII. To Mr. Armchair General HarTzell, one auTomaTic window To open aT his given command. ITem IX. To Mr. Slide-rule I-lill, one aTomic-powered car To prevenT The embarrassmenT oT running ouT oT gas while Taking his week-end Trips To New York. ITem X. To Dave Myers, we bequeaTh one Tamily-size boTTle oT ThaT world Tamous Kill or Cure I-Iadacol. ITem XI. To The kiTchen sTaTT, headed by Miss Bick, we leave The excellenT Table manners of us Seniors Tor emulaTion by The underclassrnanl Aheml And To I-lard BiscuiT Reber Those deli- cious smells ThaT make us hungrier. ITem XII. To Mr. Wayne V. STrasbaugh, one package oi sour apple seeds To grow more Trees To hang more S.T.S. vicTories. ITem XIII. To The coaching sTaTT, we leave our personal auTographed books oT The greaTesT aThleTes oT The world such as: Ally Oop , Joe Palookan, Ozark Ike , Flash Gordon , K.O. Kelly , and Sagebrush Sal. ITem XIV. To Mr. Wagner, we give a seT oT LuTkin's newesT measuring insTrumenTs which will eliminaTe The use oT his guessing sTick. ITem XV. To Mr. Pappy I-lirsch, we give one yachT Tor his Trips on The see. ITem XVI. To our Dearly Beloved MaTrons, we bequeaTh, now ThaT we are leaving, The laIesT radar equipmenT To know The whereabouTs of The boys. ITem XVII. To Boss Denlinger, we leave a suiT oT armor To proTecT him Trom Tlying brick, rnorTar, Trowels, and oTher shrapnel. ITem XVIII. For Mr. Brody, we insTall a direcT hook-up To The wires oT U.P., A.P., l.N.S., D.P.. U.C., and 5.0.5. so ThaT he will have ample news Tor each issue of The CraTTsman. ITem XIX. To Mr. Panama Evancoe, we give an album oT recordings of book reporTs of famous books so ThaT he will no longer have To ask sTudenTs To read books and reporT on Them. ITem XX. To Mr. DeVoy, we give The laTesT insTrumenT ThaT will Take smoke ouT oT coTTer keys. We pledge, on our honor, ThaT The preceding Will shall. To The besT of our knowledge. be binding on all Those involved. However. may iT be known ThaT any characTers menTioned in This documenT are purely TicTiTious and any resemblance To anyThing human is purely coincidenTal. Signed, sealed, and wiTnessed in The presence oT The Tollowing: Big Bill NoTary Public Tennessee Bill U. R. Hunsicker Dollar Bill R. U. NoThsTein Unpaid Bill

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ye Cmoot fleonoralvle Qlaoo Cwill Q3 1953 l-lear Ye: l'lear Ye: l-lear Ye: We, The ouTsTanding and diligenT class of I953. aTTer being subjecTed To The severesl' menTal and physical sTrains bearing The TiTles: D.D.S.. Ph.D.. M.D., LL.D.. Mary D., P.D.Q., Q.E.D.. L.S.- M.F.T., and B.O., do hereby declare. deliver. reciTe, reporT, relaTe, proclaim. dedicaTe. offer. pronounce. and oTherwise uTTer our lasT will and TesTamenT on This day oT June, I953 A.D., A.M.. from The halls of our Alma MaTer. our TaiThTul STS.. locaTed aT The end of EasT End Avenue in The Thriving meTropolis oT LancasTer. Penne.. which lies aT The iuncTion of RouTe 30 and The ConesToga Creek. bounded by The CounTy Prison. ShanTyTown. ConesToga Cafe. Merkley's Serv- ice wiTh a Smile, and oTher local land marks. Our only demand is ThaT we be laid away To resT in uTmosT reverence and decorum in our wooden boxes-Thanks To Mr. Wagner, oTTicial caskeT maker. wiTh a TV seT To pass away The long winTer evenings in The happy hunTing ground oT The hereaTTer. As Tor any debTs. noTes. and l.O. U.'s, we now dispose. dispel. disperse. dissipaTe, discard. dispense. disTribuTe. or oTherwise geT rid of in The Tollowing manner: lTem I. To Boiler House Gaul and his TrusTworThy assisTanTs like Keep 'em repaired John- son, we bequeaTh a year's supply of humble sTudenTs Tor SaTurdays Through The courTesy of The Parole Board. whose judge and iury consisTs oT The Tollowing: Eagle-Eye CroessanT. The Shad- ow SchulTz. Dick Tracy Denuel. LighT FooT HeTTner, Sam Spade Hower. and The greaT Sherlock Holmes KraTT. lTem ll. To The sharks oT Aby Rogal's canTeen. we bequeaTh a copy of one of The besT sellers The LiTTle WhiTe Cue Takes a Tip . or Ten Easy Lessons l-low To ScraTch . or Show-Me-A ShoT-I-Can'T-Make wriTTen by The noTed experTs. Sure-ShoT Shumski. Never-Miss Kovach, and ScraTch STehman. lTem III. To The up-and-coming sTudenTs, The boys in Room 4 oT CoTTage C will supply aT low cosT, a ToolprooT meThod oT disappearing aTTer lO:OO p.m. and evading NigTh-beaT ShorTy. lTem IV. To Mr. Auchenbach and Mr. Fiorill. we ioinTly bequeaTh. because of a Tie, Gundar The Wonder . Haegg's l-low To Run A Mile In Four MinuTes . or Who Will Be The FirsT To LighT Up AT Four ? lTem V. To Professor Tiny WrighT, we give, granT, besTow. confer. yield. imparT, presenT, cede. surrender. relinquish, or oTherwise leT him have The secreT oT The success oT The Kornkobblers Tor which he has been sTriving Tor The lasT Ten years.

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