St Johnsbury Academy - Lamp Yearbook (St Johnsbury, VT)

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T11E AC AI )EMY ST LT DENT William Smart and Jimmy Daniels are supplying the whole of the Western Hemisphere with fine skunk pelts; grown on their skunk farm in Lyndon Corners, just opposite the LaPoint and Dodge Brewery Company where the best and only the best beer is brewed, known internationally as Two Feathers and a Rose. Betty Bolton, Chief Problem Solver in two hemispheres, has been proclaimed by leading scientists the female Einstein. Not only has she time for problems in the organic world, but she also has time for problems in the inorganic world. Miss Bolton recently married William Rodd, the famous track star of today, who has found a way to run faster than anyone has ever run before. (It is our private opinion that for once he didn’t run fast enough.) Barbara Brewer recently won the Jitterbug Contest in the state of Vermont for her fine footwork. She has been running dance in Danville for the past six months, ably assisted by Dorothy Bruce, Waltz Queen of New York State. Bouncer Brodien keeps the Danville dances clean. Francis Boutett has perfected a way of dissecting animals without bisecting. For this achievement he has been awarded the Clay Hill Prize in biology from the Howard Eastman Foundation. The late Howard Eastman who established this fund gave his life with the French Foreign Legion during the battle over King Tut’s harem. Mac MacDonald, four years All-American Quarterback at Granby Tech, lias become a contortionist. This is due to his superior ability to run around his own end in good old Tech days. Patricia Hamilton Katherine Shores P.S. Any significance in these predictions is purely intentional. 28

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JUNE 1948 Rowena Bennett, Hildegarde Bedor, Marion Clark, and Mary Abbott are telephone operators in the Podunk Hollow District. They are planning a trip to Europe and hope to introduce a telephoneless telephone system there. As a result of a sad love affair. Connie Hackett has decided to remain a spinster. Donald Blodgett has married Janet Moore and taken his wife to live on Mount Washington. Marion Butler is running the paper mill in Gilman singlehanded. Gwendolyn Watts led the recent revolt in India against the dictator government set up by Theresa Guyer. Miss Watts declared Miss Guyer was illegal and unjust. Miss Guyer was unavailable for statement. Joyce McAllister was head chorus girl at the Latin Half. She has created a new tap routine called “Am I Loaded”, with the assistance of Jackie Roach, who insists that Katherine Shores really created the routine. At this writing, Miss McAllister and Miss Shores have taken the matter to court. Margaret Skinner, secretary to Miss Shores, who, by the way, has just returned from a vacation to the Caribbean region, swears that Katherine had nothing to do with the creation of “Am I Loaded”. Miss Skinner pins the blame on Betty Urie, who has mysteriously disappeared. Perhaps Miss Urie has been the guilty person all along. In two months the court decision will be known. However, Miss McAllister has lost her job at the Latin Half. Lucille Cushman, famed as seamstress all over the world, is making all the clothes for foreign weddings. At present she is working on the clothes for the marriage of Madelene LeBlanc to the Prince of Rumania. The Prince is having to abdicate to marry the woman he loves, but nevertheless Miss Cushman has agreed to make the finery. Betty McFarlin is raising sheep dogs on a ranch in Paraguay. Richard Gero and Doris Provost are co-editors of the Goss Hollow Gazette, a gossip sheet missing none of the scandals of the neighboring towns. Margie Dow, Arlene Pollock. Eleanor Carroll, and Barb Thayer have left on a husband-hunting expedition to Siberia. They hope to meet Stalin and plan to persuade him to shave off his mustache. Jody Pillsbury counted on going with the expedition but she hated, to leave her lucrative position as president of the National Date Bureau in Montpelier. Her motto: You select them—we’ll get them. Neil Hall has been driven to drink by the women and is taking a rest cure at the Beauvue. Joyce Goss is painting his portrait at the present time. She hopes it may be hung in the Fairbanks Museum. Carolyn McLaren is raising prize-winning corn in Mclndoes. Erma Guy is assisting her. Robert Johnson is the end man in the minstrel show in which Grace Jacobs does impersonations of A1 Jolson. Lorraine Plant, drama critic for the New York Times, says the show is the best thing this side of Passumpsic. Betty Ash, Alberta Ash, Irene Gervais. and Helen Drew are teaching the natives in Samoa the Gregg shorthand system. No luck as yet. Alice Babcock has invented, in collaboration with Betty Lou Petty, a new lipstick. They are to be presented the Nobel Cosmetic Prize later this month for fine work in the field of How to Get Your Man—and Keep Him. 27

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JUNE 1948 CLASS ODE OF 1948 The muffled sound of the closing door — Shut forever on those carefree days. Then the pang of sorrow and regret amidst gladness. The years are slipping slowly by. But vanished not are the joys of youth, And other doors will open. Rays of sunshine through the clouds Memories — shadows on the wall of time All that remains. To dwell on these echoes of the past means failure; To embrace them and go on — success. —Natalie Litvich 29