St Johnsbury Academy - Lamp Yearbook (St Johnsbury, VT)

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20 THE ACADEMY STUDENT 1 was over in the probate court this morning and I had a long talk with Alden Sears (You know lie’s a judge now) and 1 got caught up on some of the old Academy students. Did you know Don McGrath is dead? ’Tis rumored 'twas the fast St. Johnsbury life that did ’im in! Enter—Red Johnson. Red—(J imme a pumpkin phosphate! Hi! gang. I’m up here to cover the game between the Dinosaurs and the New York Yankees. Did you know that Carl Kuniholm recently became the World’s Champion wrestler, greatly aided by his manager, Franklin Barney? Also, Phil Bovee and Alan Colburn have a match for the world’s heavyweight boxing championship soon, in Madison Square Garden. The winner will succeed Joe Louis who recently retired, undefeated. Dot—Just what are you doing now, Red? Bill—Didn’t you know? He was recently made chief sports announcer for NBC. Red—On my way through East St. j. I saw Bob Gannon. You know, he is now the mayor of that metropolis as well as being Commissioner of back roads. Eire alarm sounds— Mac—By the way, Neil Burrington is head of the Fire Dept, and Bob Porter was elected Sheriff of Caledonia County and Victory. Bob uses a door bell on his car as a signal to close in when making a raid. Bill—Fred Bassett is in charge of all Caledonian Record sales boys. He shows a keen insight into their problems, gained from his own experience as a newsboy. Mac—Jacqueline Begin was recently elected the first woman president of the United States on the gold standard ticket. Her campaign manager was Arthur Berthiaume, who helped to show the country what the policy would be by offering a gold dollar to each person who voted for Jackie. Dot—Betty Lou Bell, who recently married the scion of one of the oldest Pittsburgh families, has achieved nationwide fame as an educator through the success of her experimental school in Kalamazoo, Michigan. Kay—Ida Bennett is running the only Men’s Shoppe for ladies in town, declaring it more profitable from the standpoint of both the men and women. Bob Emmons has decided to become a buyer for this shop. Mac—Regis Bernier worked up to become manager of the St. johnsbury branch of the First National Stores. His lovely wife, the former Marie Bradley, helps him as assistant manager; and their three children act as clerks. Bill— Two well known lawyers of our class, Malvern Blodgett and Charles Ashworth, have recently become more prominent in a breach of promise

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THE ACADEMY STUDENT 19 PROPHECY SCENE—Parks’ Palladium PROPRIETOR—Theron Parks TIME—1957 Enter—Dorothy Whaley, successful editor of that sophisticated magazine for sophisticated people, “Spec.” Dot—Gimme a pumpkin phosphate. Enter—William Lyster. Bill—Gimme a pumpkin phosphate. Hiya Dot! Dot—Hiya Bill! What are you doing up here? Bill—Oh, I’ve come 'way up from Virginia just to have one pumpkin phosphate ! Dot—What have you been doing lately anyway? Bill—1 ’ve just been elected mayor, first selectman, and cemetery commissioner of East Swashback Center, Virginia. Of course this takes a lot of time from my tobacco plantation but it gets along all right without me. Know what’s cooking with any of the other members of our class? Dot—Well, I had a letter from Arlene Amey the other day. She just opened a private hospital for injured baseball players. Jeanette Begbie’s her head nurse; and boy, they’ve got a rushing business since Skitch Weymouth started running the St. Johnsbury Dinosaurs. Enter—Katharine Powell. Kay—Gimme a pumpkin phosphate. Hello Bill, have you seen the latest Strauch girl ? Dot—What do you mean, Kay? Kay—Well, Carolyn’s drawings have taken the place of the Petty Girl and Gene Tierney as the army’s favorite wall decoration. Gloria Tubman’s her model and Armand Blake is applying his knowledge of mechanical drawing in designing the frames. Dot—Oh! Did you know that Mary Dean McLellan is up here on a visit. It’s the first time she’s come back to St. J. since she closed up her Wee Shoppee in West Danville and moved to Bunchabananas, Venezuela, to be with her husband, who’s stationed there as the representative for one of the large steamship lines. Oh, look, here she comes now! Enter—Mary Dean McLellan. Mac—Gimme a pumpkin phosphate. Hi Kids! I’ve been visiting all around.

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THE ACADEMY STUDENT 21 case. In this case the judge, J. Joseph Killilea, awarded Helen Thurber the sum of two million dollars. The consensus of opinion is that it was a put-up job because, soon after. J. Joe married Helen and they are living on this money. Red—Say, Beatrice, where does Parks get the pumpkins for these phosphates? I want another one. Bea—He gets them only from some farms around here which are run by members of the Class of ’42. Some of the farmers are well known for other things, such as Chandler Nelson and his blue-ribbon heifers; Milton Whitney and his chicken ranch; Winston Adams, who raises a variety of corn which grows 8 feet high ; and Warren Blodgett, who raises purebred Jerseys; but they all raise the excellent pumpkins which we use here. Bill—By the way, Kay, what are you doing now? Dot—Didn’t you know? She has conclusively proved that Einstein’s theory is wrong and also discovered the 7th and 8th dimensions. Mac—Clementine Babcock recently became president of the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to the New Hampshire Forests in recognition for her work as tree primer for the white oaks. Red—Frederick Barrows is the owner of a row of theater seats which he uses as a gum parking lot. Dot—Life’s ambitions often change, at least in some cases such as Elsie Bovee’s. Even though nursing has been the chosen profession since infancy, teaching South Americans how to rumba now takes its place. Kay—George Cawley, after successful appearances in The Walrus and the Carpenter and Rich Man, Poor Man, will appear on Broadway this fall in a revival of Charley’s Aunt. Red—Betty Coakley has achieved her greatest ambition of being a home economics teacher. She is now a member of the faculty at the University of Vermont. Mac—The Class of ’42 is well represented in the FBI, as Stanley Collins and Julian Collins recently joined. They were immediately assigned to the code deciphering department when their handwriting was examined. Dot—Lovers of poetry and solitude look to Marjorie Cook’s daily column in the Syracuse “Chique” for a new cure for the annual epidemic of spring fever. She says her success is due to the fact that she never uses her cures, but just prescribes them. Bill—Velma Rash and Mary Toney recently won the Ladies’ National Doubles Bowling Championships. A great part of their success was due to pin-boy Joe Corbin who set up their pins and put up twenty pins each time.