St Johnsbury Academy - Lamp Yearbook (St Johnsbury, VT)

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THE ACADEMY STUDENT 19 Agnes Keneson is delving in the works of Tennyson. She wants to find out how Sir Arthur came to be king so she can tell “him”. It would be nice to have royalty in the family. Bob Andrus is still in M. I. T. But we have hope that he may get out this year since Larry Canning is desperately trying to coach him. Phyllis Murphy’s face is being spread on bill boards all over the country as Chesterfield's “Girl of the Month,” with the famous slogan “She Satisfies”. She won a contest for this honor with a photograph taken by Donald “Birdie” Beer. Barbara Bean and Ed Murphy take turns demonstrating beach wagons to male and female prospective buyers respectively. The Home for Elderly Spinsters was founded and is being run by that well-loved character “Papa” Simpson. Two of his first and most popular inmates were Grace Downing and Josephine Darling. The class has three farmers; each farmer has three wives; each wife has-----------but that’s a different story. We have heard that Roy Campbell, Francis Drew and Wilfred Wright are all descendants of Brigham Young or was it Rudy Vallee? Your old funny paper friends, Mutt and Jeff, are now in the movies. These famous characters are portrayed by Glenn Pelow and Jimmy MacDonald. The supporting cast includes Kathleen Stanhope as Mrs. Mutt, Bob Bedard as Cicero and Germaine Pepin as Cicero’s cat. Charles Strong is modeling for Kreml ads while Rose Langlois is on the modeling staff for “Mademoiselle.” The “Flanders Girl” has been substituted for the “Petty Girl” and the “Gibson Girl” in “Esquire”. Hazel Warrell is the model. In the educational field we have a number of people. B. Abbott and E. Placey are running an air conditioning college at the North Pole for eskimos. For a number of years A Moore has been Dean of Kozy Kindergarten and is greatly aided by M. Holbrook, who teaches the children to hold their books right side up. y Speaking of aviation (or were we?) our ace pilot and plane manufacturer is Robert Peters. He says “When Better Planes Are Built I’ll Be Out of a Job.” The first and only fatality in the class so far was that of Bryant Buck. His death came as a great shock to all his classmates; and they were still more shocked when he was restored to life by Dr. Ray Fox’s astounding invention, “The Cure-All”. (10c a bottle, 2 for 25c.)

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18 THE ACADEMY STUDENT The “Grande Dame” of the stage. Carol Boynton, after several attempts to retire, is appearing with the leading contemporary comedian. Bishop McGill, in Velma Vance’s drama, “You Can’t Take It With You” or “Hey, McGill, Come Back With It”. In the wrestling ring “Bone Buster” Boutwell has recently performed the super-human feat of throwing “the Angel” under the guiding hand of manager, water hoy and general handyman Elmer Morrison. Prior to this bout he trained on the “Old Maids’ Angora Rabbit Farm” run by Ranny Boyce and Mary Miller. At the present time a very small percentage of our class have taken the plunge in the deep dark pool of matrimony. This is probably due to the fact that during our four years at the Academy we were a very studious and conservative group and had no time for mere frivolities. We have retained this attitude up until the last few years when Rejeanne Mary Daigneault flew off to Timbucktoo with “Two-Buck-Tim” Higgins. This has broken the precedent resulting in a spree of marriages which, according to Philip “Cupid” Astle, head of the newly established government marriage bureau, has reached the unequalled height of 13. The most sensational of these was the parachute jump-wedding of Frannie Lindsley and Dick McGill with the Very Reverend Barbara McCrae officiating. In the sporting world Roberta Faufaw distinguished herself by a solo hike across the Sahara, and Helena Davison established a new record when she skiied down Mr Everest. Speaking of skiing, George Farnsworth is running a chain of ski hospitals in the Rockies. Luella Drown, Ruth Meigs and Inella Daniels arc managers of the three largest establishments. The Ladies’ Undies Inc. has stopped production because of a violent disagreement between the Silk Lingerie Union and the Petticoat Makers Union headed by Geraldine Bean and Josephine Desilets respectively. So far we have given our prominent classmates the most attention in this report. But there are others who are enjoying the satisfactions of life to the utmost. We find R. K. Furse recovering from an injury which he received when his W. P. A. shovel broke. As for Freddie Eastman, recently we heard his newly inaugurated radio program on which he reads the Sunday comics to the younger children. You can easily recognize his program by the theme song. “You’d Be Surprised!” Doreen Fraser, as traveling companion to Yolanda St. Laurent in her tour of Vermont, while in the vicinity of St. J. came upon Nick Economou in his position of bartender at the newly established bar in Butt Alley. Betty Dinsmore’s Daffy Doo Dads Inc. has just put on the market a braille system for blind dogs. They read by their tails. In collaboration with her, Annie Whitehill runs a dietitian kitchen for dogs in the Blue Book.

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20 THE ACADEMY STUDENT Richard Cook, unlike Columbus, long- ago had a smak'ng suspicion that the world was fiat. Within the last three years he has pa m. hed a map proving his theory. Barbara Witters, manufacturer of Witter’s Water Wings, has a startling guarantee, “If they don’t work, come hack and Witters will refund”. Ila Alger and Irene Amell are running a dance hall in the St. J. A. O.d Chapel. Due to the reduction of prices from 10c to 5c a dance and the importation of a floor show consisting of “Hot Foot” H. Cunavelis, “Nimble” Norma Brewer and Jitters Margaret Gillander, it is doing a thriving business. Ruth Carrigan and Allene Beattie are joint proprietors of “Ye Sille Dil-lie Hatte Shoppe”. ’Tis said they have orders for Sille Dillies for the next decade. Celina Duquay is manager of the Vermont Division of the Women’s W. P. A. and Ruby Page is treasurer so that she can count money. Delphine Heath and Irene Dolgin are going on that long talked of trip to “West Podunk and a Half”. Betty “Take a Letter” Cross is public stenographer in the other half of West Podunk. Information concerning the following will be greatly appreciated: Robert Beverly when last heard of was in the Peabody Conservatory of Music majoring in voice. So far we’ve heard no news of his graduation. Hellene Heath and Kathleen Rosson were on the way to I lotto Spotto, Africa, to sell waffle irons to the cannibals. Another member of the class, Gerald Heon, has not been heard from since his letter two years ago to Keith Macey. Writing from Baluchistan he said, “In my capacity as missionary to these poor benighted people 1 have made several inquiries for you, but 1 do not sen that the possibilities for establishing a chain of grocery stores here are very great.” Catherine Cairns is raising Cairn Terriers on her southern estate, Rhode Island. Hilda Handy is helping her. It is said that Hilda is very “Handy”. And last, but not least, Jean McKenzie has r.n hour on WDEY at 0 o’clock. Her fan mail is increasing daily as more farmers have discovered that the cows like to listen to her soothing playing at milking time. Announcements concerning the 25th Reunion this summer have been sent out. We hope to see a goodly number present. Time- June 30- Place-St. J. A.