South High School - Tiger Yearbook (Minneapolis, MN)

Page 16 text:

IO Class Boo k, 1904 Simpkins. Sally ! Sally Oatcake!! You've forgot your mail! O. John!-----I'll he denied if I’m going to run after any spring chickens. Xo, sir! I can't spare the time. • My business is too large. (Enter Jones and Perkins, talking.) Jones. Yessir, the hog made quite a find when it rooted up that ’04 sheepskin. All the other hogs were jealous and the billy goat hutted in and wanted to eat it. So we named the hilly goat “Hilly Newton.” Perkins. It’s a well known fact, you know, that a turkey gobbles. Jones. Yes. Perkins. Well, that fact isn’t so well known about the Literary Society but you ought to see them eat fudge. Jones. I know. I’ve seen Westerson eating it! Perkins. You remember the big hill back of the town— Jones. Yes. Perkins. And you remember the clay bank back there? Jones. Yes; what’s the matter with them? Perkins. Well, doesn’t it seem strange to find Clay near the Hill. Jones. Xo: Clay and Hill used to be found together quite often when I went to school. Perkins. I tell you. tho e hogs are proud of their find. It is just like those good old championship foot-ball days to see them root. Jones. Those times were great, weren’t they? Perkins. You are right, they were. Hut what’s become of the senior class of the year we won the championship? Jones. Let’s buy a paper. Maybe we can find out more in there. I heard Harold Winslow, the Seven-Corners newsboy, hollering “all about the hog’s queer find.” ( Buys paper.) Perkins. Hogs are the ones that generally do make the find. That was a great class though—the class that made Minneapolis famous. Old Han McKenna was in that class! He is head of Teamstsers Union Xo. 9 now. Boss Bauer, too. He runs the Eighty-nine-cent Store down on Washington. We have some famous women from that class as well.

Page 15 text:

Class Book, 1904 9 In nineteen hundred four, King Philip won renown And ’twas in the year of nineteen-four that Reuben came to town. Great Alfred burned the cakes in nineteen hundred four; And when the angry dame came back, A1 ducked behind the door. She could not find a flat-iron, so grabbed a cord-wood stick— Rut, as I told you before. Great Alfred was too quick. 'I'lie great year nineteen-four heard Paul Jones name resound. In the same great year a little more of radium was found. We bought Louisiana in the year of nineteen-four; ’Twas the same time that young Georgie made Cornwallis feel so sore. King Solomon went to court in nineteen hundred four. Jones built a house that year, it had a hardwood floor; Noah sailed his Ark in nineteen hundred four. The arc-light came out then, twas never seen before. A great many more I could tell to those who may he waiting around to hear. But pause I must, for a cause that is just—To wipe off a pensive tear. For, in that year, a famous class went out of South High’s door. 'Twas the greatest class, of all the mass—The Class of Nineteen-four. John. Going back to those Shakspere plays again, you remember the scales Shvlock had to weigh out Antonio’s flesh with— Sally. Yes ; what about them ? John. When he was forced to give them up to the state, it was the cause of his downfall. Sally. How do you make that out? John. He lost his balance and could never regain it. John. Speaking of the old times reminds me of home (becoming serious). It reminds me of Mr. Jones, too. I guess I’ll be going. Sally. That's so. Ma will he wanting them stamps and the mail. too. Guess I'll be going. John. Let’s go together, then. Sally. All right. Give me a two-cent stamp. Mr. Ximpkins. (They leave, forgetting the mail, which Ximpkins discovers on the counter—runs to the door).

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CI a s s Boo k. 1904 11 W hy, we’re even represented at that big hotel at the lake. After aimlessly wandering around the country for some time (for her health) Blanche Haverstock was sought out for the position of superintendent—of the dish-washers. Say, Jones, did you know that Earnest Crew was up at the insane asylum? Jones. No; how does that come about? He never studied at school that I know of. Perkins. Xo: it wasn’t that. He worked so industriously down in manual training that they gave him the position of instructor in that department at the school for the feeble-minded. Jones. W ell, what’s become of Jim Bowman, then ? I haven’t heard anything about him. Perkins. He used to study his English lit. I le is one of Crew’s pupils. Jones. So St. Peter took them in ! Perkins. And since the real thing has disappeared, Kixmoeller and Stromme have been faking as the Siamese twins. They are all tied up with ropes, you know. Jones. They were bound to be together, weren’t they? Perkins. You remember how dramatically inclined Myrtle Pendergrass and Alice W inter used to be? Jones. Yes. W hat are they doing now ? Perkins. They are starring in the great melodrama “Pair o’ Dice Lost.” Martin Hovde takes the part of Timid Tim, the villain, in the same play. Jones. I hear that Harry Hoover is proprietor of those new bachelor apartments down on Park. They say that many prominent men are staying there. Perkins. Yes, even W illiam W’ingreene, that gentleman of leisure and model of fashion, has taken up his residence there. Jones. That reminds me. Can you figure out how W illis Xevvton made such a large stake with that enormous appetite of his. They call people who arc always reading, book-worms. I guess lie must have been a grub-worm. Perkins. Folks say that suckers bite on grub-worms. Jones. You remember Bennie Zimmerman—his head of wool always reminded me of a sheep.