Shelby High School - Cruiser Yearbook (Shelby, NC)

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PROPHECY There have been no limits to man's accomplish- ments. He has split the atom, he has discovered the wonder drugs, he has produced machines which, with astounding speed, can travel miles into the stratosphere. Is it not conceivable that man could advance his mental facilities so as to enable himself to look into the future? With self hypnosis as the basic facility, my somewhat feeble mind as a factor, and by the application of the secret given me by that master of medi- ation, Snuffy Smif, I suddenly find myself able to peer into the dim, dark future. The year is now 1975. As I enter the gigantic industri tropolis of Shelby of all universal tra e y L. B. Izzi's discovery- Wray Rabon and jack Gold. These extrava- ganzas, strategically placed, are designed exclu- sively to discourage the sending of flying saucers by the Martians. Strutting down the street, smoking large black cigars and dressed in the most expensive suits that the fashion center of the universe, Pluto, can offer, are the prominent poolroom operators, Bill Mauney, Milton Bridges, Squirrel Hawk- ins, Cordon Shull, and Buddy Miller. They are currently being sued by the World Covemment for tax evasion. They can't escape justice because Tommy Roebuck, that ruthless, man-hunting head of the F .B.I., and his undercover men, Joe Hamrick, R. B. Costner, and George Magness, of that prosperity-essential material-Musicaph- ' are keeping Weathered eYe5 on them- Qe Eraudus, or'Broad River Mud, I am mueh surprisecTaTfindTng fhe business section virtually the same as it was back in '53. Upon asking the town bums, Charles Horn and Dave Byers. I am told that it was because of the crusades of Ann Kennedy, Barbara Allen, Ann Sherer, Ann Greer, and their Ax-Angling Avengers, who fought and won the battle to keep uptown Shelby as a memorial shrine for posterity. As I look about at the vast array of figures scattered over the city, I recognize most of them, for they have changed very little. Strutting around among the populus, flexing his muscles for all to see, is Gorgeous,' Fish King, now Heavyweight Champion of the world. Sitting on a bench in front of the corner drug store are All-Americans I d Jim Horn, who now coach the Shelby Athletic Supporters, who have for many years led the National Professional League. Led by wain, Chuck Cockrell, and Whiz iWhite, sons of the family prosperous all ndy, and Dean, who were stars in '53, e Joie have been holy terrors on the gridiron. The Shelby Farmers are now coached by ' ' and Bill Kir .E I ., E . . 1 - kdall, oldetime Ne.uLYork Yankee Stars. Sitting on another bench are Patricia Carpen- ter,.- Bobbie Guthrie, Marjorie Wilson, Jean Grealish, and Io Ann Roberts. These masters of artistry, after three years' work, have just com- pleted several one-mile-square portraits of Sarah As I look across the square, I see Andre i e and Richard Wortman's ultramodem cafe, The Sudden Deatlin' just as I enter, the wrestling matches are getting to a frenzied start on the large SSF V fSee-Smell-Feel-avisionl set. Featured tonight are the World's Women Heavy- weight Champions, Dru Weiland and Barbara Webb, who will take on the number one con- tenders, june Sarratt and Phyllis Henderson. L am guite astounded with the DU-U1bEL,Qf celebrities present tgglay, Lgoking around, I see two Nobel Prize winn - ' s d for his best s he Woods Bill Padgett, renowned for his discovery of several ancient documents CMiss Crow's birth certificate, etc., -and two of the World's outstanding women athletes, jo Ann Byers and Gay Runyans. Whoop- ing it up also are a group of famous hunters just in from a day at Jupiter. Among them are Gene Gamble, Mfszstop, Virginia Higgins, Lettie Jo Cummings, Gail Falls, Joy Blanton, and jewel. Qganrfagd. Gene and Bob are universally known as big game hunters and the others are renowned -f?' Men hunters. Huddled over in the corner discussing strategy are the joint Commanders of the Space Force, Thomas Ramsey and Beppie and Caroline de Vries. Several movie stars-Shirley Roberson, Beth Beam, and Dot Carpenter, all beauties of our class-are furnishing the floor show. They are supported by Lib Moore and Shirley Kitchen,

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MANAGER BUS DRIVERS GENE GAMBLE TOMMY WILLIS CAMERA HY SENIORS GENE GRIGG JIMMY LANE PI-IATE MCSWAIN JIMMIE RODGERS MCSWAIN GORDON SHULL JIMMY TUCKER MARTHA WILSON QUEEN, Post Graduate X3 STORE BILL PADGETT MILTON BRIDGES

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PROPHECY the original, old-time Red-Hot Mamas, and also by a chorus line of those bodacious beauties of Broadway-the Rocket's, composed of Shirley McIntyre, Lorene Davis, Annie Barber, Ruth Guthrie, joyce Fisher, Shirley Randall, Martha Wright, and Helen Spangler. Glancing back to the SSFV, I see that it is now time for the men's wrestling. There before me are some of the largest, most ferocious, Gar- gantuan hunks of humanity imaginable. They are: Harold Eskridge, H oward Abemathy, Donald Hughes, Summie Lee Hendrick, Kenneth Ledbetter, jim Hardin, and Richard Bivins. I also recognize the referee as Gayle Wylie, who is said to be the tallest midget in the world. Hearing a deafening noise, I rush out on the street just in n --- - 1- ' -' - '- - - - , Bobby Hambright, 1 H f- - nd Gene Grigg go roaring by in their jet l While out on the street, I see Mayor Snow Hendrick, Animal Confiscator fDog Catcherj, john Hunter, and vir oso of voice err Hill and Vicki Plaster. They are all standing in ront of Henry Fogle's Used jet Agency. Along with them are Bill Self, now manager of the A 81 P Store, Dickf Shull, Edwin Turner, and Slim Lane-the latter three having been so good at cutting fclasses and suchj work in Bill's meat department. As I stroll down the street, I pass the Baldy Dome Beauty Shoppe. Here the beauticians Dorothy Bell, Burnie Borders, and Carolyn Bailey Crisp are busily at work changing Martha Wilson Queen's, Patsy Shepherds, and Grace Yelton's hair coloring to the current fad of pastel green. Next I pass the store owned by Phate McSwain, the man who made the 12 dollar landing gear possible. Glancing in the window, I see Boss Charles Toms and his henchmen, Tommy Willis, Bob Towery, and jim Mauney, collecting the weekly protection money. From the radio of their parked jetmobile erupts the unmistakable sounds of The Grand Ole Oprey. Immediately I recognized the melodious voices of Carolyn Kidd, Margf Killian, Lunette Lewis, and Ioyce Grigg singing The Great Speckled Bird. They are accom- panied by the yodeling Cackle Sisters, Billie Ann Roberts and Martha Singleton. Deciding to visit the old Alma Mater, I board one of the quaint old Shelby Transit Buses. My money is taken by Frances Kelly and to my horrification I find that Carol Mabry is the driver. Sitting in front of me are the town gossips Barbara Lovelace, Pat Ledbetter, and Kay Lee talking about the scandalous party recently given by the Society Leaders, Carolyn Dedmon and Barbara Hopper. Stopping to put a few gallons of oil into the picturesque antiquity in which we travel, I find we are in front of the Shake It Off Charm School. There Christine Davis and Doris Capps are teaching jo Ann McSwain and Ruth Williams the art of driving men to insanity. Downstairs is the blood center, where Doctors julia Abernethy, Elinor Moorhead, and Barbara Francis are getting blood from jimmy Tucker and Richard Beam. This is no easy process. Every few minutes it is necessary to blow the head off it so it will go into the bottle. Finally reaching the school, I am warmly wel- comed by the principal, Doris Poole. jo Ann Bridges, Doris Ramsey, joan Kilpatrick, Edris Blanton, Irene Beam, and Dorothy Hamilton, now with the aid of the completely visual edu- cational system of teaching, are vainly striving to teach our kids and Charles Howell, who is still taking biology. But alas, my mind is weakening under the terrific strain and with great reluctance I retum to the present. In my short visit I saw that we, the class of '53, though loudly proclaimed by our elders as being of weak mind and of ir- responsible nature, will in the future make a better world. And as I retum, a feeling of con- tentment floods my being as I think of the promising future that awaits the class of '53. sf f H ' Lori: SMITH Prophet 0 ,sl -- - , 'o f. CD I3 K X f N' 'l V .23 V 7' O