Schuster School - Proscenium Yearbook (Cincinnati, OH)

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bespanglcd coslumc which she struggles to hook. 1 Kin you beat these costumes? Honest. lwouldn't ask a dog to wear 'em! Why, they're so old they're fallin' to pieces! 1 should worry! I ain't no seamstress. 111 go out with my back stickin' out before I'll sew a stitch! Say, why, why won't the thing hook? CALL BOY Over-choor - OoO-ower-choor! MILLIE l-Sinlfs info flier chair, almost in tears. I It wonat hook! It won't hook! lt worft hook! Whafll I do? I'll never be on! iShc springs up, wrestles with 1'! again, gives it up- stufs a powder puf in the bosom of the dress, pins on a false curl at an awful angleiii'ifills her mouth wifh pins and aliacks the dress once morej CALL BOY O-ver Choor! ! ! ! Tem-pust. MILLIE lShe spits pins in every direction, and dashes for the door, crying I---Comin y' rummie, keep yer shirt on! Hold that curtain. Comin' I says! Wait a minit. Comin'! Gee, this is some show! CURTAIN Our Chorus Girl Correspondent Class of 1911 Page seventy-nne

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can stick 'em down with soap! Who thought to bring soap! Gee, ain't they no runninl water in the room! WatIIl I do? Well, Iill never be on! ITO herself. I Shut up, Millie, you'll be on an like it! ITbere is a bang al the door.I CALL BOY Say! Tempest! Y' never signed the book! MILLIE Well, fer Cawd's sake sign for me.r It wont give you writer's cramp. You know Ijm here! CALL BOY Say, wadaya think I am? I ain't yer mother! MILLIE Aw, sign an' shut up. CALL BOY Irin an enormous voiceI Fuf-teen minits, fuf-teen minits. Evibocly on stage when I call overchoor! MILLIE Ichanging her shoes for pumpsI Gee, I'll never be on! VOICE. OF TAILOR Ioff stageI Tailor! Any glose to be gleaned an' hressed? MILLIE Igrabs up a shoe and Fires it at the doorI Beat it. No! we ain't got no Clothes to be cleaned. Wadaya mean, comin' round when we're hurryin, like this? Get out! I She begins to dress her hair. I CALL BOY Iat doorI Laundry! Got any laundry to be sent out? MILLIE IwildlyI Say, will you git away from that door! We ain't got no time fer laundry now! An' I ainit gonna pay you for What you done! Them towels is awful! IA sbort squabble between them, then -I Get out! ISbe qus the other shoe. Suddenly she stands iransjixed She stares about, the picture of terror. I Who's whistlin, in here? Mary Foster! You poor amachoorl Wadaya mean, whistlin' in this room? It ain,t a superstition! Every time anybody whistles in a dressin' room, the person next the dodr gets Bred! An' I'm nearest to the door! There ain't nothin' you can do now. Well, go outside an' turn around three times, an, cross yourself. Gee, I'd rather have the witches, curse on me! Well, fer the love of Mike, will you look at that Foster girl's slippers! She's got 'em on the dressin' table! Kin y, emagine it? It's the worst luck you can haveli Sure sign youill walk out an' never come back! EShC takes a cigarette from her make-up box and lights I'LI Huh? Wadaya mean, No Smokin'? Well, I don't believe in signs! Iwa goes behind the sheet. A moment later she emerges in a Page seventy

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JUNIOR WIT Junior e Why does Laura Hoffman resemble a violin? Seniorel don? know. Why? Junior Uacetiouslyyw Because she's so often seen with a beau. HEARD IN MAKEUP CLASS Mr. Agin was explaining the fact that Eucalyptus was used in a certain kind of make-up. Huh, said Betty Langmeier, looking up with the putty nose she was trying to blend in with her own features dented queerly in the middle and ludicrously point- ing sidewise, HI thought that was some kind of fits. AT REHEARSAL FOR HTHE BRIBE The Director e Monday night, dress rehearsal. Edna Rohan e But my costume won't be finished. Mr. Agin tinnocentlyy- 0 well, just wear a suggestion. SCANDAL IN THE OWL! Dignified Member of Schuster School Faculty Reported Engaged in SNOW FIGHT IN COLLEGE HILL It is reported that the Dramatic Director of the Schuster School deported him- self in such a manner on the Sanitarium grounds that one of the keepers mistook him for an inmate. The leading man was thIOWn dOWn twice, and several of the girls' faces were severely chapped when they next appeared at school. QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS What length ought Gertrude Brice's petticoats be? A little above two feet. What is the first thing Clothilde Heiman looks for in Church? The hymns thimsl I What does A1. Cash take from you before you know it:J Your photograph. Why is Edna Rohan like an umbrella? Because she is accustomed to reign. Why does Miss Griffin often call the moon the silver moon? Because it comes in halves and quarters. Why is Clothilde Heiman like salad? They both take a lot of dressing. - Olga Reinstatler. Page seventy-two