Saugerties High School - Sawyer Yearbook (Saugerties, NY)

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CLASS PROPHECY by HERBERT LACHMANN Assisted by ROSE SIMMONS, PAUL AMROD, and ROBERT DOYLE Scene: 'Courtroom in Saugerties, June 28, 1954 Usher: William Goff-Hear Ye! Hear Ye! This court. is now in session. The case of Muriel Ferraro, '44, versus Robert Doyle, '44, is now before the court! Honorable Judge William Kauf- man will preside. Judge-The prosecuting attorney, Wil- liam Brinnier, shall begin. Defense-I object, your honor. All the jurymen are members of the Saugerties High School Class of 1944. Since this case is involved with a class reunion I believe that this jury is biased. Y Judge-Objection overruled. None of these jurymen was present at this class reunion. However, each juryman will explain his absence. Usher-Miss Therese Bittermann. T. Bittermann-My boss, Mr. Robert Lang, President of Twiddly Toy Works, had a date with his girl, and Hazel Tobi-as and I had to work that night. Usher-Miss Helen Cashdollar. H. Cashdollar-I cou1dn't make the re- union 'cause Rose Vanderbeck and I had to take part in a special chorus number for the President's birthday party. Ulsher-Miss Katherine Anne Knaust. K. A. Knaust-Miss Charlotte Heese -and I just returned today from South Africa, where we were vacationing. Usher-Mr. John Cox. J. Cox-Bob Waters, my co-pilot, and I were on our way from Chicago, but had flying weather held us up' for a day. Usher-Miss Jennie Greco. J. Greco-Lillian Lewis and I were very busy that evening finishing a dress we fashioned for th-wt very notable dramatic actress, Miss Virginia Mason. Usher-Mr. Herbert Hymes. H. Hymes--Albert Greco, Albert Buono, and I had a special engagement with the Glasco Hot Spots at the Rain- bow Room. Usher-Miss Shirley Snyder. S. Snyder-Sonja Warnecke, Eleanor Knauss, and I, in our nursing capacity, had to take care of Paul Amrod at the Geneva Institute for the Sane. Mr. Amrod was suffering a nervous break- down from modeling men's clothing. Usher-Miss Olga Max. 0. Max-Douglas Axtell, the mathe- matical wizard, and I were desperately helping Mr. Einstein solve his Theory of Inverse GEOTRIGRICOSMOPOLEY. Usher-Miss Betty McGoey. B. McGoey-My friend, Charlie Cole, and I, were trying to win first prize in a rhumba contest. Usher-Miss Ren-1 Rusconi. R. Rusconi-Mr. Harold Van Etten and I were with the party that was lost in the Canadian Rocl-:ies after breaking the world's record by scaling a mountain 200,341 feet high. Usher-Mr. William Tompkins, Jr. W. Tompkins-For your information, Mr. Robert Ricks and I were in Wash- ington, D. C. demanding more rain for the Farmers of America. Usher-Miss Florence Weikel. F. Weikel-My rival, Ethel Stay, and I were competing in a swimming race from Honolulu to San Francisco. Na- turally, I won! Ethel is still one day's swim from San Francisco. USHER-Before the prosecution be- giI1S, it is announced that all witnesses will testify from their seats. W. Brinnier-Miss Ferraro, take the stand please. Miss Fernaro, tell us briefly what happened at the tenth re- union of the Saugerties High School Class of 1944. M. Ferraro-Miss Jennie Burhans and ,I are members of the Metropolitan Opera Company. Naturally, -as part of the program, we were asked to sing. So, standing next to the piano, we were singing a duet. Mr. Joseph Stycos, the world famous piano virtuoso, accom- panied us, and Mr. Robert Doyle turned the pages ot the music for Mr. Stycos. Suddenly, the lights went out! I faint- ed! When the lights came on, I dis- covered that my 3100,000 pearl necklace was stolen! At the same time I noticed Mr. Doyle coming from the cellar. He was standing right next to me before my necklace was stolen. W. BRINNIER-That is sufficient for the present, Miss Ferraro. Will Loren Beatty, take the stand and give his story of the disappearing necklace. L. Beatty--I was talking with Miss Juanita Zeigler, the famous woman track runner, and Miss Kathleen Snyder, the baby food specialist. Oh yes, at the time, Mr. Edward Van Gaasbeck had just finished demonstrating how his factory produced 3 million articles for babies a day. W. Brinnier-Mr. Beatty, did you see Mr. Doyle coming from the cellar after the lights came on? L. Beatty-Yes, I did. W. Brinnier-Th-at is all, Mr. Beatty. Will Miss Dolores 'Donlon st-and to testify. Miss Donlon, will you please tell the court what happened before the lights went out? D. Donl-on-Miss Doris Maclary was telling Miss Gertrude Smith and me about her job as personal secretary to Mr. Franklin Delano Roosevelt. llf you can keep a secret-Mr. Roosevelt plans to run for ia seventh term!! W. Brinnier-That will be all, Miss Donlon, I'll see you after court. Miss Marion Koehn will stand. Miss Koehn tell the court what you were doing.

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SALUTATORY The easier part of life is over. We are past the mole hills, and the mountains are yet t.o be scaled-mountains that are big as any ever faced by a class. We hope that we are ready to climb, and we are confident that our teachers have given us ade- quate preparation. There is no way at this time that we can sufficiently thank our teachers for their efforts. Such things can be answered only by what we do in the future and not what we say now. We are grateful to the Board of Education for providing us with such a competent staff. Our parents have guided us, our friends encouraged us. To all of you we are deeply grateful. Tonight our class meets for the last time as a group. Tonight this group greets you -and bids you welcome to our commencement exercises. JOSEPH M. STYCOS VALEDICTORY For four years, we have been visualizing and .awaiting Commencement, the night when we would start showing an eagerly waiting world that we are .ready to make it a better place. On that night, we would cease being the concern only of our families, teachers, and friends, and a bored, listless public would become our animated co- workers. Suddenly, it's commencement, our night-to do what? The question where to go from here arises in our minds. The question is not too difficult to answer-circumstances have decided the des- tiny, at least for a few ye-ars, of some of the members of our class. However, the question of how to go about living as an intelligent adult, remains. We have received what is termed a liberal education in subject matter as well as -actual practice'in leadership and good citizenship. Now, when we are placed in situations, especially those forced on graduates by the war, we wonder if our educa- tion should have included rifle practice rather than Shakespeare or a study of lma- chines rather th-an the Constitution. We must realize, however, that the diversity of our education will enable it to come t.o our aid in any of various activities. Huxley has defined a liberal education as one which trains the body to serve the will readily, and the education which we h-ave acquired in high school fits t.he description. We have learned in our various courses the standards that others have attained and the methods that will enable us to maintain these standards. In -all our courses, without realizing it, we have been learning how to live intelligently, subjecting our actions to our wills at all times and in all situations. Now we realize th-at tonight is truly our night, not to start displaying our tal- ents as we had been planning, but to begin molding them to the world's requirements as high school has taught us. RUTH GRANWEHR WE ACCEPT THE CHALLENGE We have had but to ask, From their books and minds, they have given, We had only to seek culture, In school, they have shown us. Taught, inspired, shown, Now we must move on- a Out to meet destination we go, To find success or failure as we choose, To struggle with impartial fate, To convince an indifferent world, Dazed by problems unknown, Still we must go on- t Over harsh mountains of struggle Guided by education, We will scale the heights of uncertainty To view our hard-earned reward. Dazzled by this promise We turn to go- 4 The present can only challenge, And obscure our distant goal, In darkness, we accept the challenge To climb the mountain for stars The future is at hand, Eagerly we reach out- by RUTH GRANWEHR CClass Poeml

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M. Koehn-Miss Kathleen Newkirk and I were arguing as to whether Miss Alice Short, beauty specialist, could do a better job of burning your hair than Miss Patricia Elliott. Of course, no one can beat Miss Mary Farrell at hair singeing. Miss Patricia Hackett, the greatest woman south paw hurler of the year 1953, interrupted us. W. Brinnier-That is all, Miss Koehn. Will Miss Carrie Lewis please stand to testify? Miss Lewis, please tell the court what you were doing. C. Lewis-I was talking with our charming hostesses, Miss Winifred Snif- fin and Miss Anna Riccardi, about the sudden migration of kangaroos to Cali- fornia. It appears that, according to Shirley Sullivan, leading chef at S-an Francisco's Shirley Temple Cafe, kan- garoo steak will be an American dish. W. Brinnier-That. is all, Miss Lewis. Will Miss Geraldine Mauro please stand and testify? Miss Mauro, what were you doing before the blackout. G. Mauro-Miss Ruth Granwehr, the great bass tuba virtuoso, and I were engaged in a conversation with Miss Isabel McClure, the leading trumpet player on Broadway. We wondered if Miss Beverly Hommell could yodel All Or Nothing At All as clearly as Miss Doramae Saile, who takes time from her teaching to enter yodeling contests. W. Brinnier-Miss Geraldine Mauro, at the moment before the lights went out, where did you see Mr. Doyle? G. Mauro-He was standing about three feet from Miss Ferraro. W. Brinnier-That is all Miss Mauro. Will Mr. Richard Shultis take the stand. Mr. Shultis, tell the court what happened during the blackout. R. Shultis--Miss Beatrice Delanoy and Miss Clara Petramale, the famous columnists of You and Your Weather Problems, and I were discussing the advantages of cows in relation to our weather problems. Miss Alice Muller and Miss Mary Sickler, the authors of Pigs, Cows, and Mice in Our Democracy, stat- ed that the extreme sensitivity of cows to slight vari-ations in weather have warned this country of many storms. W. Brinnier-But what happened dur- ing that brief blackout period. R. Shultis-Well, immediately after the lights went out, someone almost knocked me down. He was going in the direction of the cellar. It was Mr. Doyle. W. Brinnier-How did you know it w-as Mr. Doyle? R. Shultis-Dolores Winnie, my co-star in the musical comedy, Tenth Re- union, and I recognized his voice when he said, Excuse me, please. W. Brinnier-That is all, Mr. Shultis. The prosecution rests. Judge-The defense will now present its case. H. Lachmann-It appears, according to Mr. Shultls, that Mr. Doyle, during the blackout, grabbed Miss Ferraro's pearl necklace, and then proceeded to the cellar, where he hid it. Mr. Doyle, please take the stand. Why did you rush to the cellar? R. Doyle-I went to see what I could do about repairing the lighting system. H. Lachmann-That is all, Mr. Doyle. Will Miss Rose Simmons stand to testify? Miss Simmons, you were in the game room of the cellar at the time, weren't you? R. Simmons-Yes, I was. Miss Shirley Beers, Manager of the Transcontinental Helicopter, Inc., Miss Virginia Beatty, Vice-President of the Home for Home- less Children, and Miss Helen Hrabar, M. D., Physician to the Home for the Homeless, and I were supposed to be playing bridge. But in reality we were discussing methods of transporting chil- dren to be adopted from the East to the West Coast by air transport. H. Lachmann-Was Mr. Doyle in the cellar during the temporary blackout? R. Simmons-Yes Sir. He asked Mr. Mike Turco, Mr. Thomas Buono, and Mr. Richard Whitaker, the famous social playboys, where the switch box was. H. Lachmann-Thank you. Now, with the permission of the judge, I would like to have the whole scene of the blackout and the supposed robbery reenacted. Judge-The permission is granted. Proceed. H. Lachmann-Miss Ferraro and Miss Burhans, will you please stand by the same piano, which has been brought here from the reunion room. Mr. Stycos and Mr. Doyle, please take your places. Will the class electricians, Mr. Ever- ett Mower and Mr. Harold Ricks, please retire to the lighting box? Will you please repeat exactly what you did on the night of the tenth re- union? tThe two sing It's a Mystery To Me, until the lights go out briefly. The lights are flashed back on and Mr. Lach- mann is seen probing about the inside of the piano. He removes a necklace from the piano.7 M. Ferraro-My necklace ! ! ! H. Lachmann-Can you identify this as your jewelry? M. Ferraro-The clasp has my initials on the inside. H. Lachmann-The initials are here. You see, Miss Ferraro, when you faint- ed, you fell against the piano and your beads must have fallen inside. Judge-Miss Ferraro, will you please withdraw your charges against Mr. Doyle? M. Ferraro-Yes, I agree. Judge-The case is dismissed and the tenth reunion of -the Class of 1944 is, after all, judged a success. THE END