Sarnia Collegiate Institute and Technical School - Collegiate Yearbook (Sarnia, Ontario Canada)

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THE COLLEGIATE IO7 gator Judge-- The officer says you were acting queerly last night. Prisoner-- Not guilty, your Honour. fudge- He states that you were climbing a telegraph pole. Prisoner- Judge, I climbed that pole to get away from a pink alli- and two blue elephants that were chasing me. Judge- S25.oo and costs. P14 :lf Pk George Clark- XVhat kind of dog is that?7' Bailey French- That's my new police-dog. George-'glt looks like a terrier to me. Bailey- It's a police-dog in disguisef, :iz Pk 73 Magistrate- After you were held up, did you call the police? Victim- Yes sir, everything I could think of in three languages. ff 24 :r sk Muriel Teskey- XVhen the tourist arrived home, he fell on his face and kissed the sidewalk of his native city. bi ting the irr Ross Nicol- Banana-oil. Muriel- No, banana-peel. Mary A: :k ai: :Ez Simpson- My, you look snappy to-dayf, ,lean XYheatcroft- lim sorry, l haven't a quarter hc Mary S.- Say, canit you take a joke? 21 P51 X Pk Famous Last Words He home early, boy. ls that so? NYe're out of gas. l'll walk thanks. Go to the office. Detention to-night. You're through at school, lind a job. Pk Pls Pk 211 The Optimist Dora- l see your cracked lin is getting' betterf . 'I . . . . 'D lb . ,, Irish- X es, l've quit kissing girls at partiesy D o r a - Or have they quit kissing you? lrish- Oh no, they're peeved about it.', :uf :k a: i43.Ck ie- lYhat is the best method to prevent the disc iscs ciused by insects ? Leek Teacher ie- Don't bite the insects. as :aa ve Student- Nine, Sir. 'l'eacher- Are you the oldest? Student- No, my father is. :ac sk :ii Pk - How many are there in your family 33 The next person to interrupt the proceedings will be sent home, said ate judge. Hurrah, shouted the prisoner. Pk ff if is Misner- I've Got a Parker pen date with my girl to night Z: pn Simmons- How come. Misner- Unbreakable

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IO6 THE COLLEGIATE. l g HEHQQ , ' Q f my s I s - eeffff' Mrs. Urquhart- Rose, can you give the derivation of 'Auditorium'. Donald- From Audio, to hear, and Taurus, bull. -A place where . Mrs. Urquhart- That will do, that will do. if if if :lf Seems too silly for anything, but we'ye simply got to ask some one how the hot dogs keep that way in the winter time. Naturalists tell us that black bears are not dangerous. Indeed, he says, if you put your hand out in :i friendly gesture the bear might lick it. But if you appear nervous or menacing the bear might mistake your hand fo-r a pickled pig's foot. :F 2? if The little lamb that follows Mary to school these days wears a jazz sweater and balloon pants. I 2? is Pk Dis XYhen people ask you to sing, don't be bashful-go ahead and do it. It will be their own fault. Pk is 2? Some girls use dumb-bells to get color in their cheeks and lots of them use color on their cheeks to get dumb-bells. as X Pk 251 IYhen the farmer's son returned from his hrst spell of soldiering, his fond father asked him how he liked the life. KK1 3 I 1 75 v 1,1 7 BCI I if F I i d I ' . N C1 t s not so Jac. yi as t e ansyy er, but can t get use to being ca e by a number instead of a name. At church parade last week. the clergyman said: 'No. 3751 Art thou weary, art thou sad?' and because I had the decency to say 'Ilhat's all right, old bean, get on with the service, there was the very dickens of a shindyf' Mrs. Jones Cto her husbandj: Henry, I wish you had better manners. I noticed that you dusted the chair at Mrs. Blake's before you sat down, and her little son was watching you. Henry: Yes, I was watching him too. I'm too old a fish to be caught on a bent pinf, Q, I. .l, .v- 'b ' , 'P 'P Do you collect anything?l' I collect my thoughts, sometimes. I-I'm. The specimens you get must be very rare. Are you fond of Hogg's tales? asked the lady visitor, striking up a conversation with the picturesque shepherd. Yes, I likes 'em roasted, with salt on, was the response. No, no, I mean, have you read Hogg's tales? No,,' volunteered the rustic, My hogs is all white er blackg there ain't a red one amongst em.

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I08 THE COLLEGIATE Freshman- Say, could you tell me how I could find the Chemistry RUO111?H Roy Brown- Sure, ask somebody. Mcfiibbon- Do you know XYendv? H H A. Kennedy- XVendy who? Don- XN'endy we eat. .5 :fc 4: :Ia Miss Harris- XVhy did Hannibal cross the Alps? Brush- For the same reason the hen crossed the road. You don't catch me with no puzzles. :a :sf BOYS OF 4A Carmen .Tones is strong and fast ln athletics he's in a single class McGibbon too is very good XYhose plunges in rugby can ne'er be withstood. -Timmy Richards short and sweet Comes to school hve days a week, Un the high bar in gym he is very zealous , . fo make the other fellows jealous. Leland XYemple has a permanent wave, lYhich will go with him to his grave. He learned to dance a while ago And now you ought to see him go. Dwight Simmons with his big feet, Can step half way across the street, On the high-bar too the lazy chump Doesn't even have to jump. Shirley Logan is almost as long l haven't it done. is his favourite song. Fat Kennedy too talks during French And has long ago received a front bench. Kenneth Porter is our shiek, And knows his lessons every week. He also is very fond of the girls, He tickles their chins and smooths their curls. Mr. Andrews- I Want a pair of spec-rimmed hornicles-I mean sporn- rimmed hectacles. Confound-I mean heck-rimmed spernicles- Shopwalker- I know what you mean sir. Clerk, show the gentle- man a pair of rim-sperned hectacles. ' P79 Tom ton visit to Detroitj- VVhat have you in the parcel. Stubbs- One of those new portable radios. McKay- See if you can't tune in The Star Spangled Bannerl' and we might perchance get a good seat in the grandstand.