Sarnia Collegiate Institute and Technical School - Collegiate Yearbook (Sarnia, Ontario Canada)

Page 18 text:

IOS THE COLLEGIATE. M. Weaver- XYliy can't you spell Cupid? Dave Mac.- When I get to C. U. Qsee youj I forget everything else. wk ai- rr ak Miss Jones tafter lecture on Yes Sir and No Miss j- Brown have you your French exercise finished for to-dav? Brown-f No l Miss jones-- No what? Brown. Art- No book. ai: we ar wk Miss Clark- XYhy do you say that twice ten' is the same as twice eleven? Lebel- Because twice ten is twenty and twice eleven is twenty-two ftoojf' :if ak :if :sf Dorothy- XYhat do you suppose Harold meant by sending me those flowers? Blair- He probably meant to imply that you were a dead one. sf is wk at E. Nichol- Some men you know, are born great, some achieve greatness. Helen Mac.- Exactly! and some just grate upon you. at as an :ef Freshie- NYh0 was Hamlet. Dad? Father- Such ignorance! bring me a Bible and I'll show you who he was. wk as :ic if Mr. Dennis- XX'hat makes the leaves turn red in the fall? Allaire- 'l'hey are blushing to think how green they have been all summer. :if as :if at Miss Harris fgto Healj- XVhat makes the Tower of Pisa lean? Ralph- If I knew I'd take some myself. at :of if 14: Bellhop fafter Kennedy has rung for ten minutesj- Did you ring, Sir? Ted- No, I was tolling, I thought you were dead. ff :ig ak :ic Art Brown Qto clerk in Music Storej Can I hear your 'Smiles'? Clerk- Nair, but listen while I laugh. Pk :ic 1: :of Teacher- The whale got his prophet out of the water. Clarry- So does our milkmanf' Pk :ac :ic :sf Little Brother- Bet he'd kiss you if I weren't here. Big Sister- You naughty boy, leave this room at once. Blondy- A man follows me home. How can I stop him from doing it? Y. Couse- Let him catch up with you. we an :sf :sf G. Lang fwithout her specsj- Is that the head cheese over there? Clerk- No, the boss is out. wk :of af :oc Brown Magic-Katherine Garrets' eyes. XYhite Magic-Baking powder. at :sf fe bk Murton Taylor Cto Gardinerj- There's something preying on my mind- Shrimp- Never mind! It will soon starve. as :sf ik ak Teskey- What is this you have brought me? IVaitress- Chicken soup. Teskey- lYell, there is no Chicken in it. Waitress- No sir. They don't have dogs in dog biscuits either.

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THE COLLEGIATE I07 the head. Men were very deformed in 1923. The eyes were crossed, as we observe by looking at the pictures of a man called Ben Turpin, and the feet were turned out like those of Charles Chaplin. Funny names were usedg one man's name is nearly blotted out, but we suppose it to be Rhubarb Vaseline. One picture has proved Darwin's ancient theory of man's descend- ing from the ape. The actions of Douglas Fairbanks show us this very clearly. The clothing worn at that time appears humorous to us. In a sur- prisingly short time feminine dress changed from long sleeves and extremely short skirts, to no sleeves and long skirts. No doubt the women were very athletic and took pleasure in showing their legs and arms, although they are not what we to-day would call muscular. A tomb consisting of three stories has recently been revealed by ex- cavators near the ancient city of Sarnia. Many rooms were set apart for the use of departed spirits, but why a tomb should contain a huge amphi- theatre, two gymnasiums and a swimming pool, with many heating facilities, can not be understood by scientists. Thirty-one skeletons have been found, and modern physiognomists say that all these once had very stern. menacing features. Blair- XYhat makes the music so catchy? Dorothy- lt must be the traps. er rr 21: is Hr x Couse- lhat snappy fellow you just danced with is in my class. Olie- You flatter yourself. Harold Johnston Ctranslating Latin J- Let the wicked and ungrateful depart. Mr. Grant las bell ringsj- All right class-pass out. 1: :ff X Miss Ferguson- Arnistrong, when does civic holiday come? Jini- lYhen Miss Harris is away. if wif :if x. Member of Collegiate - It's awfully warm in herefl Grace-'KBetter see the circulation manager. Maid- The garbage man is here, sir. .-Xbsent-minded Professor- Dear, dear, tell him I shan't want any to-day. Kennedy Cin Taylor's Shopl- Say Wlif. do you want a belt in the waist? Hand- Do you want a sock in the jaw? U Let me kiss those tears away, sweetheart, he begged tenderly. She fell into his arms and he was very busy for a few minutes. But the tears flowed on- Can nothing stop them? he asked breathlessly. N h d lt l f '-ltof l l o , s e ausn ere . s my evel Ju go on nlti tie treatment. 53 J! Miss Brown- ls that door ajar, Lampel? Isaac- A little vase. :lf fr ff X Lebel- How did you enjoy your ocean voyage? Grace- Dunno, I made the trip by rail. X vs :ie 4: Lampel- Say Mint, what is it that is so easy to get into and so hard to get out of? White- Bed.

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THE COLLEGIATE 109 A DARK DEED He sits alone in a darkened room Alone in the fading light XVhy is his brow so heavy with gloom And his cheek so deadly white? But though his heart is faint with care His courage never tlinches His eyes are hxed in a glassy stare NYhat is it his firm hand clinches? A little courage he murniurs, yes A little and all is wonl A choking gurgle, more or less: A gasp and the deed is done. lVithout a shudder or eyelid wink Oh! It makes the heart recoil That he should so calmly drink A dose of Castor Gil. -I. McKeown. ji. Miss Harris- 'What do we learn from the attack on the Dardenelles? Hand Qdreamilyj-i'That a strait beat three kings. She- Don't you think that talkative women are the most popular. He- XVhat other kinds are there F Mr. Dent- Class, I am dismissing you ten minutes early to-clay. Please go quietly so as not wake the other classes. She are gone Her has went And left I all alone Must I always go to she XVill her ever come to me It can never was Her is went from I Me is gone from she Us will no more Together is Him has took her Her has took he And them will think No more of me How come it was? Ever lose a hotel pillow And wake up with frantic fear? Hunt it frantically in darkness, Find it stuck behind your ear? Yes, and for the sheet I've hunted VVhen I could not see a speckg And where do you think I found it? NVound just twice around my neck.