Sarnia Collegiate Institute and Technical School - Collegiate Yearbook (Sarnia, Ontario Canada)

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122 THE COLLEGIATE The honor system prof. all trust-untrue false. Goofez gazarks gimlet glug-untrue false. Test No. 3. lf a cucumlmer is more like a hilliard hall than a frankfurter, stand on your heacl and sing .'Xnnie l,aurie : hut if cheese is thicker than water and the square root of the differential is less than twice the arc of the llitchegesian flea take a high dive oil the Campanile. Test No. 4. Prove hy Geometry that if any triangle is as to its hase as a given tri- angle the hypotenuse of the greater will he less than the sine qou non uf the former and will vary indirectly with parahola of the meridian. If the above is ahsurd take a nice long' drink of sulphuric and tell how it tasted. Test No. 5. 1. .X-l-1 equals C, and D is less than P.D.Q. Find the perpendicular height ot the circle if one side equals lC.L.l2. 3. C is greater than ll and less than H.Y.D. hut not so great as A.l-LC. plus li.R.ll. Solve for hy substituting for lil. Klstopf, Now the mental deficiency test is over. Hy our new and improved sys- tem of grading, students will not have to wait for their marks. All Colleg- iate readers got one hundred plus, plus. All others received minus ten. Gahler- Your honour, it is true that I was speeding but I can explain, if you will give me a little time. Aluclge- Ten days. is X wk PK Doey- How du you make ethylene? Doug.- Feed her at the Dominion. yy Fred Pugh- Say, Snowhall, is London the next stop? l'orter- Yes, sah. Brush you off, sah? Fred- Nopel l'll get otjf myself. wk :K if Pk llarher- Your hair is getting gray, boy. llarge- l'm not surprisedAhurry up. as we as if Hayes lto l'lotel-Keeper at Xkioodstockl- Say, guy- did you ever hear of the straw that hroke the camel's back. Landlord- Yes, why? Buzz - XYell you will lind it up in that hed in No. IO.H 75 71- if 35 Miss Story lnight of The Senior l- .-Xll ready. Run up the curtain. Stage-hand- Say, lady, what do you think l am-a squirrel? Mr. -?- Young man, the lights of this house go out at eleven o'clock. l':11lIllZ11l+u'lll'l2lt suits me. Don't delay on my accountfl -lllflgf-Uxkllllt is the verdict of the jury? I l Foreman- Your honour. the jury are all of one nnnd-temporarlly insane. as :ac DF Pk Macklin- I dreamt I died last night. P!! Gates- XYhat woke you up. Macklin- The heat.

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THE COLLEGIATE l2I gee ee or O . to W 5: eeee fm . t...,1ii.D Enigma. Sezirrow- l Ivy, lierg.. l would like to see you zipztrt for Il minute. lliilm- ISIN,kifl,wh1ulil11yuh think l zini. L1 puzzle forthe little ones. ii ' ' ' -lziekf l could d:mee on like this forever. XYin.- Uli, l'm sure you don't mean that- x'ou'rt bound to A xt 1 A , , iiniiro ' z Miss ll:u'1'is-'AXX'liz1t liziiilieiiecl to llziliyloii, flzii'x'ie? 'Chic'- lt fell. Miss l'lzirris- iXml what lizipiieiiecl to 'llyl'L'?H 'Chie'f lt was punctured. As Idle As A Painted Ship lQz1iiclol1ilii S:1y, do you know our Collegiate sliortstoli reminds me uf the .-Xn-:ient Al2ll'l1lClA.H Co1'eyf l low Clllllk' Y lizinrlolpli- l li- blilllllftll one uf tlirei-. Ullie- 'xX'liy clou't you wezu' ezilieo :my more? Frzinees- Uh, l hate tu see myself in print. lilll'llCS-uxlllllllf iuzilies you so smzill, Cliristie? Christie 4briglitlyJ-- XX'ell, you see, when l was :L bzilw' uiy mother fed me on ezuinetl milk :ind now l'ni condensed. ig: sg Mr. Dent fin elieniistryl- l lIll'l-QIICSS, what does the syiuliol .X stand for? Ross- .lustz1 minute, l've got it on the end of my tongue. Mr. Dent- XYell spit it out, its arsenic. pg gg 25: rg: HOW TO MEASURE THE VOID ABOVE YOUR EYES Mental Capacity Test Do not write zmytliing' until you are told to begin, then write nothing. If you are unable to do at problem don't. Test No. l. Candidate can write on any two of No. 1. 1. If the obliquity of the ecliptic were 55, how long would it take to get a book out of the lib? 2. If higlipoehloriel-c acid contains more water than Lake Huron, would it boil while freezing. lf not, why not? Test No. Z. Rearrange the following' cross-eyed sentences and indicate whether they are untrue or false. But none the bench upperelassnien warm-untrue false.

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THE COLLEGIATE I23 My bonnie looked into a gas tank. The boy stood on the burning deck The depth of its Contents to SCG, And uttered with a chortle. He lighted a match to aggigf hini, XYhen columnizers hear of me Oh, bring back my bonnie to me. They'll make my fame immortal. Enid- l suppose your father will be all nnstrung when he hears about your exams. llannah- Uh, no. I wired him last night. yy XYaiter- Tea or Coffee? Eddie Robinson- Don't tell me, let me guessf Daddy McRae- Say, Bud, why did they make the Duke of lfiuskingham a Knight of the Garter? Parsons- Because he was one the li1ng's -:hiet supporters. Miss Harris- XYhat intiuence have the Ancient Greeks on a modern college education ? Spears- XYell, we still throw the discus a little. SC 5' 9 S: Annie- XYho made this fancy ink well? Yerna- Search meg l didn't even know it was sick. Delmargul wish I were a star. Helen- I wish you were a comet and then you would only come around once every fifteen hundred years. Ik 2? IK Ik 3C CLASS Viola Lannin, daughter of the chief ls very fond of taking French leave. XYhen once upon a subject she gets a grip, Then her greatest delight is that class to skip. Speed Mactlregor, the typewriter champ Lost her speed in trying to vamp. And now poor Bessie. much to her woe. Can only about fifty words per go. Next Sambo Hobbs, smartest in the class, Who chases dogs to make us laugh. XYhen she begins to speak in Spanish, All her audience starts to vanish. Grace Bedard, Turkish delight, Sleeps all day and growls all night. Wihen upon her bangs you look. You think of a 'lap girl in the book. Helen Smith, a bright young student, XYhen in class is very prudent. Though she laughs all day, she works quite fast, That's how she's in 3C class. Florence DeAth is a bright young hopeful XVho never looks very sad or doleful.