Salem State University - Clipper Yearbook

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1932 S. 71 C. only on paper, but Mr. Phillips always used to say that the world's business was figured on a paper basis. Look who's flying around on a beautiful pair of white wings'Mary Conley. Mary, during her stay on earth, became a play producer and was said to have written, produced and acted in the worst Cand incidentally in the bestl shows ever shown on Broadway. Mary tells me she was talking to Mamie Russin a few clouds away, and found that she married a certain dentist. Mamie always did have a weakness for dentists. Betty Goldman spent her life as an acrobat in Sells-Floto circus. As a sideline she studied the status of society with a view to improving it, but now the world and society just ain't no more. This proves Betty's life-long contention that study is a great waste of time. Now, I wonder who this little fellow is? Oh, yes, I thought he looked familiar, Musty or Professor Muniz. Ahern! Sees all, knows all, and never misses anything. Wherever Musty is, Cohen must be too. We all remember Mr. Cohen's skill in arith- metic at S. T. C., and since opposites attract, Mr. Cohen, so it was reported to me, married the belle of Marblehead, his former student in algebra. Wonder what all the excitement is over on that white cloud? Why, someone is being helped up the ladder from earth to heaven! Late as usual-it's Alice Kiember. Well, I'm not so surprised as I might be, for after all you just couldn't expect Bubs to be on time. She made a dramatic appearance at the eleventh hour for her wedding. Bubs' life work on earth was that of congresswoman from the State of Holyoke. You say that's a city? You see, even Teachers College graduates can't know everything. It was made a separate state due to the wide publicity given it by A. A. M. Kiember, Ph.D., M.A., etc. Dot Lucia, sitting peacefully on a cloud, states that she has chosen lecturing as her work. She spoke on any subject from A to Z for any desired length of time, and was awarded the title of the worId's greatest lecturer. Dot Ernst, Kay Powers, and Evelyn Murphy were chemists of wide-spread fame. Dot spent a life of earnest effort to prove the value of a one-mouse power lung. Kay definitely established the fact that the most important things in life were the shortest, while Evelyn worked on the theory that 'tis better to have spoken and have been heard than to wait until you are called upon, and then give the wrong answer. Roy Goren worked on the Like and Unlike Theory of Twins. I was just talking to Helen Henderson and asked her how she spent her days on earth, and to my surprise she answered in bed. You see, she was a night-club hos- tess. Suddenly it begins to grow dark, and I can just see Mildred Rose, who reports that her life had been devoted to the interests of international affairs. All things must have an end and so did my dream with the sound of the Chapel Bell. 27

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The Tall' Woof 1932 With the announcement of the Yiafxrt Book staff we were glad that several of our class were honored: Mary Horrigan, Business Manager, Alice Kieniber, Associate Editor, Kay Powers, Humor Editor, Dorothea Lucia, Photography Editor, Kay Santamaria, Printer, and Roy Goren, Typist. Is it any wonder that our book is one of the best ever? Due to the fact that a bill was before the State Legislature to change the name of the State Normal School, Mary Conley. chairman of the Ring and Pin Committee, had some job before the pins and rings were linally ready for distribution. Can it be true that our senior year is a thing of the past with graduation,classes, all too soon mere memories to be recalled and relived with the aid of mental tele- vision? Since such is the case, Fellow Classmates, stand prepared to meet the many challenges which the future holds and rest assured that the history yet to be made will be fully as brilliant as the history of your college days. EVELYN MURPHX' Z1 Qllnmmertial Seniors Erwin The world has ended and all the people thereof are standing at the golden gate of heaven. Well, said I to myself, here is a good chance to see all those people who didn't appear at the last reunion of the Commercial Senior Class of 1932, and find out how they have been treated by the cruel, old world. Standing head and shoulders above the crowd is Marion Macdonald, and as usual, she is furnishing music for the occasion. Suddenly I spy Kay Santamaria standing placidly awaiting her turn to enter upon her eternal reward. Of course, Kay has no doubt that she will be given a pair of wings, because since june, 1932, she has been editor of the True Love magazine and has helped many love-lorn and torn hearts out of difliculties. She tells me that one of her most constant customers in this line is Mary Horrigan. Ha, look hereeFran Altieri, sound asleep, but I wake her up to see if she knows any news. Fran always seemed to have gotten in on everything. She herself, since '32 had been secretary to a Turkish sultan. She had also satisfied a life-long desire to travel, having embarked on the matrimonial seas more than once. In her travels, Fran encountered Sophie Baranowski who spent her life on earth singing in a church in Algeria. Anne and Kay Shoppes were known everywhere throughout the United States and Europe. Anne used to do the buying and Kay the selling, but somehow they never made any profits. They finally hired a first-class accountant from the firm of Donahue, Inc. to help them out. Helen Donahue could always make a profit, Of course, it was 26

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The Tear Boob 1932 last will mth Zlliestmnent oi Tins Coixixiizizcui- SLNIHR Cihxss County of Fun 1 To all who have any time State of Madness I to spare and will listen - Having reached the climax of our most impressive careers as students of the State Teachers College at Salem, Massachusetts, we feel it only fitting and just to future classes, not so gifted as ours, to bequeath certain of our most valuable and unique possessions to aforementioned classes. With this most generous thought in mind, we do make and declare this to be our last will and testament, containing the following provisions: Fran Altieri leaves to whosoever dares to use it, her famous wink which plainly says Maybe I didn't give the answer you wanted but this one is fully as good or better. This requires hours and hours of practice with waves of hand at stated inter- vals. Sophie Baranowski leaves her unusual record of never having missed a day in her four years at this institution. Bubs Cotherwise known as Alice Anna Mary Kiember-my, what a long name for a small personD leaves her knack of making dramatic entrances. In other words, her ability to come to each and every class late, and get away with it. Wouldn't advise you to try this stunt as you haven't Bubs' capacity for looking innocent nor her eyes. No one has. Anne Chaisson leaves to Eleanor Sargent her theory of The Power of Silence in Classrooms. You know still waters run deep, but figure it out for yourself. Israel Cohen leaves to some adventurous Junior his ability to take and carry on Education, Foreign Trade classes, etc. They laughed when I stood up at the desk, and when I started to teach-they kept right on laughing. Dot Ernst leaves her ability to entertain. 'Member Gloucester and house- partiesn? Any connection between the two words? Nuf sed! Roy Goren leaves her ability to wallop a ball to Peg Gates. CConversation before a gym classj: Oh, Roy, are you on the other team? If so, then the team where she wasn't just lay down and died. Helen Henderson leaves her ability to climb up and down ladders without hesi- rating. Mary Patricia leaves her oratorical skill in sociology classes. She should also leave her good-nature and happy frame of mind 'cause who ever heard of a good- natured school teacher? Betty Goldman bequeaths her charming smile to a Junior for use solely in Mr. Sproul's classes. 28