Salem High School - Quaker Yearbook (Salem, OH)

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country school until she entered S. H. Sf as a Sophomore. Graduating from there with great fame, she sojourned to New York, where she took up Grand Operag but her voice being naturally weak, failed entirely in a short time. Francis Fisher, successor to Belasco, her first manager in Grand Opera, gave her up with great relucta.nce. She then tried moving pictures and became the star of the Movies. CBoy arrives with eablegramj L.--QOpens it, reads, sighs joyfullyj then: Say, B., can you make a good front page and red letter story out of this? Creadsjz Miss Mary Bustard, while traveling in Europe, kidnaped by Gypsies. Rescued by Crown Prince of Poland, who was traveling in disguise. Resulted in romance-wed- ding date not yet announced. B.-That surely will take the town by storm. CPhone rings. B. hurriedly answersj O, yes, H. S. Observatory. Cecil Chessman has found valuable ways of using volcano gasg great discovery-much fame--to be sure 1'll make it up in good form, By the way, has Clarence Farr found the right place to set the world so he can blow it up? No? Well, that is too bad. Eh? What? Oh, he says he still has hope? Well, 1'm glad to hear it. Yes. Good-bye! CB. writes busily for several minutes, at last L. asksj : L.-Say B., did you attend the Chautauqua last night? B.-Yes, and I have to make a column out of it, too, but that will be easy, for Nellie Lewis spoke several pieces in dialect and was vastly appreciated. Then there was a lecture by the well known historian, Dorothy Lease, who has just completed a twenty- six volume work of Exploits of Bacon Down the Mississippi. L.-And, by the way, I forgot to tell you the Gearhart Circus will arrive here some time next month. The manager, Mr. Gearhart, is a famous mandolinist and uses his talent in a thrilling scene, where he charms a lion and ravenous cobra into submission. There seem to be a great many celebrities in the troupe. One, Glenn Bates, is a favor- ite clown, who produces much laughter through his ability to stumble over all obstacles in his path. It is said he gained this ability by practicing on the study hall floor while a Freshman. Another, Leah Burton, has become quite a famous tight-rope walker. Some ay she showed signs of genius along that line while in high school, by her well balanced remarks in History IV. B.-Well, we sure will have to push that, and see it also. L.-INell, speaking of old friends, I met John Cavanaugh just the other day. He said J. Rockefeller, Jr., had just given him the contract to construct a gigantic bridge connecting America and Europe for the Rockefeller family's private use. He says that he expects to make some money on it, and at the christening he will take a honeymoon trip across the bridge as a special concession from his employer. B.-That's great news. I hear that Russell Campf is still working on a reflector which, when finished and applied to his hair, will eliminate all need of matches, flash lights, and electricity in his home. L.--Those items surely will attract attention. l will give them plenty of space. B.-VVhat did you say about society? L.-I said your society column was so meagre this season I made it a little longer than usual. l think with this important headliner it won't be so bad, Creadsi: It is said that Miss Dorothy Fox has decided to be a missionary in order, to test her ability as a charmer on the natives of Borneo. From her marked ability so much in evidence in her high school days her friends have no doubt as to her success in for- eign fields. B.-Here's another item of interest which goes with tonight 's issue: Misses Edith Lentz and Augusta Snyder, former secret serviceiagent in the employment of Mexico, have started on a walking trip around the world, which they expect to accomplish in l91Q days. They are taking their aeroplanes alongginvcase of accident. L.-Have you noticed how extremely popular our Luke McLuke's Random Shots are becoming? page thirty'

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Chili, will be gratefully received by District Attorney Wright of Guy Building, New York. The latter is executor of a two million dollar estate left Miss H. by a maiden cousin. . L.-H'm. Wish I were Miss H. Tapping at the door. B.-fAnswers-talks low, then turns to li. with several write-ups in crude form.j B.-Well, that youngster Brown surely is making good. Here' are a few write- ups about several of our most noted citizens-finished up in great style, too. Just listen Clieadsj z Miss Mildred Hutcheson, until recently known as Jude,'l has secured a specimen of the genus homo in the form of Count Adlephus Sextet Von Lucia. The romance in- volved is very thrilling. Miss H. has been the prize hair dresser in New York, spent her last vacation in the wild and woolly Alaska, where on account of her knowledge of hairs, she saved the famous count by a hair's breadth from falling over the Klondike. Immediately she was heralded far and near as the heroine of the age and before many moons had elapsed she was engaged to the noted Count. After their honeymoon to Stumptown, Nebraska, they will remove to his place in the Stony Mountains of Hun- gary, where it is said they will dine on fish three times a day. li.-Well, I guess l'll have to promote Brown. He 's too good to be a cub any longer. Guess l'd better make a memorandum of it and raies his wages Qtakes note bookj. B.-liisten to this. He seems to have interviewed Russell Gwinner: 'Rus' Gwinner states that he will enter the ring for the featherweight championship of the United States. He has just returned from the West where he spends his leisure hours and seems as buxom as usual. li.-Well, that surely will come in right to till up that extra space in the sporting column. Anything else for that department? B.-Yes, Connors has turned out to be the best coach Harvard ever had. lt is due to his vast experience and also to the lively enthusiasm of his little red-haired wife, who never misses a practice and whose loyalty to the heroes of the gridiron is unques- tioned. Ii.-Now, l always knew that those two red-heads would make their mark. XVell, l'm glad of it. What have you there that ls interesting? Out with it-don't keep me in suspense. B.-To be sure our paper would lose its popularity if it weren't for old steady Blake. He came in the first thing this morning with some Pinkerton news, mostly a big joke, I guess. The staff didn 't want this laugh to get out, but depend on Blake to find it-here goes freadsjz , Jim Wilson, new Pinkerton man, has just made his debut on the detective statf. NN'hile traveling down Peanut Alley in the fashionable district of New York, he discov- ered a strong scent of strange perfume. His interest was aroused, he began walking swiftly, ever keeping the scent in view and his spirits and big hopes of discovering Diamond Dick, noted for perfumery, were high. Also he desired to raise his salary. He traced the scent through thirteen consecutive streets, ten tenements and four ceme- teries, and at each step the scent grew stronger. His heart grew light with visions of a large purse, a fair Helen and much fame, when at last he espied a dark figure -in the distance? Ilastening on as he used to do in the relay, he at last overtook the object of his journey. Sitting dejectedly on a milk stand, swinging his feet dismally to get them warm, was Leon Hcnault, noted perfume and patent medicine vender of New Albany, Ohio. As a result Jim 's fame has increased, but not his salary. L.-Cliaughs heartilyj NVell, I guess most any one would make a good story out of that. Just a little change and that will be ready for print. What 's on that pad there at your elbow? B.-CTurns, picks up pad and s1niles.J O dear me! I nearly forgot to give you my interview with the Great Movie Actress, Mary Pow, commonly known as the second little Mary Pickford. These are the facts: Born in Salem untold years ago, she went to the page twenty-nine

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li.-Yes, Miss Mary Wilson surelydoes have some original statements. C Both listen.l B.-What in the world is that awful noise? L.-Oh, I know,-it must be Miss Cole, who is the leader of the W'omen's Brass Band, which has been touring the world. for the past five years, practicing. B.-And she has taken rooms just opposite our office. Well, we'll see that she does her practicing some other time. L.-I second the motion. Nevertheless all that practicing results in some fine music. Don't you agree? B.-CNods assent. Picks up unopened letter, tears open and readsj Here is an answer to one of the For Sale Ads. It reads: I wish to buy the rocking chair offered for sale along with the other old junk that the S. H. S. has offered for sale. I want to keep it as a remembrance of meals I en- joyed while occupying this particular chair. Very respectfully, MR. HARRY GOLDY. L.-How perfectly absurd, but 1 can't recall what it all means. B.-Why, don 't you remember 'way back in the Senior year of our old school days he always had a fondness for rocking chairs, especially at the noon hour when he took his dinner? And he used all kinds of means to get that particular chair before any- one else. fThey both laughj. L.--Well, guess that ends our work for the day. Q By the way, B., do you realize it is twenty years today since we joined forces in this newspaper venture? B.-Impossible, I don't feel that old yet! L.-Nevertheless 'tis true. You remember we had some diiiculty on account of the antipathy of the people toward a paper edited by women? B.-Yes, but they seem to be reconciled to it now. Of course, that constitutional amendment granting woman suffrage was quite a booster to us at the critical moment. Ii.-Yes, and furthermore our paper has a circulation at present rivaled only by the New York Sun. B.-Let's celebrate. L.-What shall wc do? CClock strikes 4 p. m.j Goodness Gracious! I just hap- pened to think of our engagement at 4:30. We surely will have to do some hustling. B. VVl1ere? Oh, yes, Hope Leeper's studio tea Kas she puts on her wraps and gathers her belongingsj L.-We can talk over old times as well as art with Hope, and we'll end our cele- bration with a little party at the new Metropolitan, where Madam Berlin, our old friend, Mabel, sings. B.-That will be fine! CTurns and both sayj Au Revoir, dear old oflice! pale thirty-one