Rush Medical College - Pulse Yearbook (Chicago, IL)

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If you wish to see a good joke, turn to page 659 of Lyman's Practice, and read the seventh line from the bottom. Perhaps the Professor himself has never noticed it. They say, with faith all may be saved, But we can see no hope For the man in the dissecting room XVho stole the toilet soap. 5' The young man with the ticket in his hand hunting his seat has been here this year as usual. Dr. B. is rather hard on himself. In class re- cently he made these two remarks: Some- time ago a gentleman came to my office who was looking for the biggest quack in Chicago, . . . . . . and. . . . . . NVhen I was a young man I spent eight or nine years in an insane asy- lum. 5' No more we gamble for what's left Of our dissected stiffsg No more we scent our boarding house With dried cadaver whiffsg No more we boil or bury them, For with emphatic tones The demonstrator has announced, The collqge' ketyvs fha bones. 5' The new and improved methods in foot-ball and in surgery go forward hand in hand. Wie heard one of the D. jfs explaining that the building of the College of P. and S. was the Phosphorus and Sulphur college. So much for D. J. chemistry. 237

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Elppenoiciti Q5 tg? A . CJ ' X. Y , . rig g x AVE you got the new disorder? ,I-H., 1' ,Q 3 Ld If you haven't, 'tis in order ' Ji? To succumb tobit at once without delay. iw. It is called appendicitis, A Q ' .l? ' 9 2' Very different from gastritis, Q - ? Or the common trash diseases of the day. f' m ll - , . Q V--' X lt creates ahappy frolic, D l A l' Something like a Xllinter colic, ' , I That has often jarred our inner organs some. Q ., A Al. Only wrestles with the wealthv, l, F ' , ' 6 And otherwise most healthy- I-Iaving got it then, you'r'e nigh to kingdom come Midway down in your intestine, Its interstices infestin', ls a little alley, blind and dark as night, Leading off simply nowhere, C. 'h' atc ing all stray things that go there, As a pocket it is clearly out of sight. It is prone to stop and grapple VVith the seed of grape or apple, Or a soldier button swallowed with your pieg Having levied on these chattels, Then begin internal battles, That are apt to end in mansions in the sky. Once located, never doubt it, You would never be without itg lt's a fad among society that's gayg Old heart failure and paresis Have decamped and gone to pieces, And dyspepsia has fallen by the way. Then stand back there, diabetes, For here comes appendicitis. NVith a brood of minor troubles on the wing, So, vermiform, here's hoping You'll withstand all drastic doping, And earn the appellation, Uncrowned King! 99? A recent applicant before the Medical Examining Board of Texas was asked: What is histology? Histology is the history of medicine. ...TCW i ' What system of medicine do you practice? ff The Vanderbilt and St. Louis systems, and some- times the homeopathic system. , 1 What is the homeopathic system, as vou call it? 'V Sweatin' the patient. J 2 I Ag - . fl -- lr . x He got his diploma. in 5-'39