Rush Medical College - Pulse Yearbook (Chicago, IL)

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tbow it tbappcneb. - There have been so many ugly rumors uttloztt about Mr. D. Edmund Smitlfs intention to X study for the Homeopathy that the Pulse has investigutetl the mutter und is glad to be able to ' explain satisfm-torily. We give Mr. Smiths explanation of the matter in his own words: ' 'Twas dis way. See? Me and Doc Minnick was shztkin dice in Wolfe place when in rolls Ks, Sport Meiklejohn and Doe Goldsbury-see? Well der iuces was nearly full and me mustache was X' tloatin' so I Sezfsez If 'Let's tling' de pasteboards ft bit' . . . fer me pockets was lined wid Velvet and I see dey was tztpioeas in sight. Well. Meiklejohn. he's a dead smooth duck wid de pictures. A he is. und he sunk me wad fer twenty Cases on de tirst splash. See? Pretty soon Goldsbury was skutin' on his uppers and Minniek ducked his nut an' dat left me and Meiklejohn to scrap it out. see? Well I trung de spots meself. and bein' ante man slung down it plunk an' sez 'dztt's one flat. ye hear me talkinf for de sky was de limit. see? IrVell Mike he boosted to one- seventy-tive. un' I met. fer ye see I had tree ladies to pull to. Den I sez, sez I, 'what ye w2mt?' 'I got 'nuff' Says Mike . . . so I chewed me tongue und left him put while I pulled to de ladies. . . Well I didn't better. see? But I had 'nuff to see de two un' hal t' dztt Mike slapped on de green an' 'L riskin' de blutt I sez, sez I. 'Flu-es up.' Well he showed two Johns un' at pair o' belles wid rt tree spot belnnds to till de bluti. hte, 5 no tt ll sen I. we ie d 5 u get de queens. I get tree meselff 'Let see Ile bu.cks.' sez he, an' by the Pabst Select. de bzxeks was ull de SILIHG, 'You'z playin' crooked here. see?' sez he. Hut I only give him de l1f,b1'St -liltllgll low down an' svotquetl de cases. lXieiklejohn. he quit de joint and yelledf'I'll play ye square. ye poor imitation ol at Dime Museum Advertisement, you.' un' de next ting I knowed he was lettin' on dat I told him I wuz goin' to be ft homonkeyopath but I'll do 'im yet. see? Say you ztin't got no eatin' tobacco in your clothes l1:xVeye? 237

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Gore, 1140 fllborc. Blood. bones. teeth. and skin. Tissue, hair and l1t1e111z1ti11. Muscle, lierve. lyllllvll, 111111 1-hyle, Sthnmeli. liver with its bile. Do not lie 1111011 tl1e l'lO0l', As they tlitl 111 alzlys of yfwe. I11 tl1e mlisseeting ITDOID. Sulpluir. onions. SRllL'l lil'ill1t- Li1nhe1'ge1', skunks, 111111 lard trim-il 11t.H Stock-yauls. 1l1llSlil'ilCS, and pig-stys, Fetid flesh z111dp11iso11etl flies. Cl1a1'uete1'ize 1111 inure the gore, As they did i11 tlays of yore. In the dissecting 1-1111111. H lalllellt- Oh for ll sight of tl1e fail'-liziireil girl. YVh0se skeleton I own: H6l'lJ9lll1tj'. gmce, z1111l lm'eli11ess. ls Dl'llYCll lay ezleh lblllllf. I know full well that dial sl1e nnuve Again, on Lifes great stage. I should not fail to ask her. To share my pilriuiuge. 236 1bow Eotb? Huw 1,l11tl1 the little l'll'l'Slll1l1lll Illl11l'UYl' the shining Illllllliv? , . , . . . ,,.. ,,. .. . . . By -11n1l1n,h1.13 illltl x11'1t111u'l111111e .Xml t1'5'111u't11lv1- 111 lt, See hnw the l0ill'llt'll llimlmlle-1n:1n IllllJl'1IVI'S 1-at-l1 fleeting' mluy. By inaking the 1-1v11111lexin11 nl' His l11'a1i11 :1 lurely graiy. 'Xml lIlPfOtll1'WHl'lllj' S1-11ie1'. lVl11'1 spenfls his 1Il'Ul,'lUllS time I11 1'z11s111u'l,11-z11'1ls unvl tleinu tlnines 'I'l111t1l1111'r lmuk well in l'llj'lll6. -Xml new what cloth the l :11g11lty'! Tlieynnt:1111i11L:tel11se. lim syn-111l flltll' tlllll' 111 plninninu Svllvll e 'lle raise the SlQlUl1'llIAS 1l11es. lVl111t ilnth the old -hllllllllllS Tf1keel1l1i111i11 the lll1Sll? V1-ites letters 11,1 T1111 V1-111-1'sv1.11 Wlii--l1sp1-11k11f 4i1uN11H1.11 liI'SIl-i What mloth the luekless lmtit-11r then If tl11ct111'S ill'L' tl1isI1111l'? ll'ell that w1111l1l alll tlepeml 1111 the lxeligifm that lie lnnl.

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