Roxbury Memorial High School for Boys - Bostonian Yearbook (Boston, MA)

Page 25 text:

To MR. CRAMER, we leave a signed statement by Dever that he will run the monotype faithfully. To MR. ERHARD, we leave a new Ivy League tie, consisting of 30% rag and 70% of unknown fibers. To MR. PEARL, we leave Auditore’s car, and Auditore to drive him to Teachers College. To MR. MAHONEY, we leave the fleas of a thousand hairy camels. To MR. SMITH, we leave a free pass to see all of Bridgette Bardot’s new pictures. To MR. LAQUIDARA, we leave the use of a job press in the “Big Shop” for the time when he finds out offset is a failure. To MR. BORTNICK, we leave our condolences, as we couldn’t think of anything for him. To MR. HANRAHAN, we leave the key to Mother Memorial since it is being changed to Technical next year. To MR. RICH, a pension from Court Square Press in case he loses the one he has here. BARRY WEINGART leaves MR. McCORMICK his first edition of “How To Speak, Read, and Write Spanish Fluently.” WILLIAM McNEIL leaves his locker filled with homelessons to MR. KEANE. The boys’ cast in the play leave MR. KEANE two passes to “BUY JUPITER!” The boys in the office staff leave MISS McMORROW a boy who will sort mail without MR. GROSS’ help. We the undersigned, having proved ourselves in a state of confusion, do hereby testify to the fact that this will is completely ridiculous and wish it to be read at BIRDLAND on February 30, 1959.

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Class Will We the class of 1959 of Roxbury Memorial High School (Boys), being of sound mind and body, and having been inculcated with the superior wisdom attainable only through a Roxbury Memorial education, do hereby assert this to be our last will and testament and do bequeath the following: To the JUNIOR CLASS, we leave our superiority, our good looks, and all the expenses of the senior year. To DR. CRUDDEN, we leave our sincere and heartfelt thanks for the three years of advice and guidance he has given us, and the knowledge that in our hearts he will always remain a strong inspiration. To MR. BROUGHAM, we leave our sincerest thanks and gratitude for being the greatest senior class advisor as well as being a strong worker for our school Newspaper and Yearbook. To MR. SHEEHAN, we leave a book entitled, “Nothing New, Just Review!” To MR. KEANE, we leave a device which will compute government marks to the nearest thousandth. To MR. COVENEY, we leave an honest homelesson boy who will faithfully do his own homework. To MR. McCORMICK, we leave seven periods of all-girl classes. To MR WALSH, we leave Steve Lerner. To MR. GREYSER, we leave a full page want-ad for a typist. To MR. GROSS, we leave MR. KEANE. To MISS BOGAN, we leave our sincere thanks for her guidance. To MR. MORAN, we leave the Cleveland Browns. (Good Luck!) To MR. BROWN, we leave a tank of laughing gas, so the juniors will laugh at his jokes.

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les Prophecy It is now the year 1984—twenty-five years since the illustrious class of 1959 has graduated from ‘Mother Memorial.” Its members have since reached all parts of the world and have established themselves in all sorts of occupa- tions. It is with the utmost difficulty that we have succeeded in compiling this history of their achievements. After twenty-five years of driving his ‘53 Chevy, Salvatore Auditore finally saved up enough money for four “border walls” for his wheels. Lennie Sorin, now 43, after having completed his ten-year stint at the helm of the Boston Celtics has agreed to take over the coaching of the Harlem Globetrotters. Harold Bausemer, after all his hard concentration to pick a profession, chose one he has hated all his life—teaching. David “Fizz Foster” Carmos will soon put into production a new toy which is certain to take the country by storm. It is a talking rabbit which he is going to call “Jupiter.” Harvey Golner dethroned Henry Cox from his Heavy-weight Boxing Cham- pionship last week in a thrilling battle which lasted the full four rounds. Cox knocked Golner down four times in the first round, but Golner came back to win the fight by way of a split decision. The referee, who was in the way most of the fight, was Robert Hirschorn. Robert J. Ciccarelli now is the proprietor of a joke shop under the overpasses of the once well-known West End. Anthony D’Arrigo finally is becoming a success under the orders of an Irishman. Larry “Pocket-Rocket-Rocket-Pocket” Albert broke an all-time record by being the first hockey player to ever fall through the ice in a game. Barry Weingart has just taken over the Advanced Spanish Department at Madrid University. He also has written a new book entitled “How to Read, Write, and Speak Spanish Fluently.” Hal Davis of New York, Mike Mallick of Boston, and Marty Brackman of Philadelphia have merged to form the E.C.L.H.C.A. or the East Coast Lonely Hearts Clubs Association. President-elect Mallick calls this a great day in the history of Lonely Hearts Clubs. It’s finally happened—Killer Kowalski has been dethroned by none other than that king of the mat-world—Larry Glazer. Glazer used his famed double reverse hair-lock and was quoted after the fight as saying, “It’s good!” Alan Kaplan will open a new T.V. series entitled, “Don’t Have Gun— Will Run.” The MacNeil Locker Co. has revolutionized the production of school lockers by giving the student a double-locker, one for his homelessons, so he can tell his teacher that he left his homelesson in his locker.