Roxbury Memorial High School for Boys - Bostonian Yearbook (Boston, MA)

Page 67 text:

Ciara of f Q36 lil? .iff l l l Amateurs' Discoveries Slcarlzle Scientific World ROXBURY, MASS. - Former radio hams at the Roxbury Memorial High School. Bernard Carver, Hal Miller, and the now illustrious Sumner Q. Koppel, T. V. A., have joined hands with Marconi and Prof. Einstein, This formidable group succeeded, after many years of unsuccess- ful search, in unearthing that previously inaccessible PQVH-26 ray. Overbrimming with school spirit the former alumni persuaded their colleagues to rename it, RMHS-36? Have you read Prof. Gilman's new book? HMUTINY ON ALGEBRA An excellent sequel to his last book MEN AGAINST GEOMETRYH Accept no substitute D. KATZ KOSHER SLAUGHTER HOUSE Pigs killed reasonably Special rates for Memorial Alumni Disconlcenl: in Pennsyltuclcee PENNSYLTUCKEE, FLORIDON IA- The state is now on the verge of revolu- tion today as citizens' committees, lc-l by E. Malsberg and M. Grishaver called a mass meeting in the main hall of the Bouncemout Theatre, the only large building in this pioneer village. Manager Price is cooperating with civic leaders by promising to chase all stray rats and cats from his supper-deluxe theatre, to make room for the patriots. This new state, founded by the famous explorer and sailor, Robert I. Glassman, has ever since its formation, suffered un- ,old hardship. First the birds refused to iiy, then the water stopped flowing. Now, just to be mean, the grass is growing back into the earth. Glassman says that if the committees attempt to oust him in favor of Sebel, the salt who just escaped drowning in a plate of soup, he will call out his army, navy and marine corps. I.O.U. News Service says that the first consists of Manuel Ostrov, the second of Samuel Goodstein, and last of Bernard Rothberg. These institutions, the men- tion of any one of which produces fear in the heart of a strong men, will play an important part if revolution is precipi- tated. fMonkeyi Business in Congress WASHINGTON. CI. O. UA Of the sev- eral bills introduced in Congress today those sure to attract nation-wide disin- terest are that drafted by Representative Werby, Plutocrat, and that of Breakfast- Table Autocrat, Senator Kosta, The Re- imbursement bill, filed by Congressman Werby provides for Congress to reimburse ,J f -4 51, x ig3!E?:TTibSisllZl-'L Y., K ,f v 4 O Y ' XV- QU' M -' , f Q i he I I f ng 'A iw , ' N i g ' N i -K ' ' 'nga Congressman Werby 30.98 for damage done by a disgruntled brick-throwing constitu- ent to said Congressman's silk hat during the inauguration of President Carroll. The Bigger Handout Bill was introduc- ed through the efforts of Hobo King Ed- ward Pellagrini, who claimed his sub- jects were having a difficult time making both ends meet whenever they tried to button their dress collars. Pellagrini, apparently a keen student of history, has been tiracing against our statesman by his stirring plea of Give me liberty or give me a hamburger on rye! If it smells we have it NICHOLS LIMBURGER CHEESE CO. They never get on my nerves. HADLEY'S NOISELESS INDIAN NUTS Not a crack in a handful FISHY ELECTION HELD Newfoundland, Mass.-The latest election of the United Fish Peddlers Unions has given forth a remarkable group of officers. The new president is the Honorable 4?J Harry Grossmang Vice Pres., Joe Lanatag Secretary, Roy Atwell Baxter, and Treas., Carl Aloysius Naimon. Friends of the organization led by their counsel, Model and McDonough, have expressed best wishes for a very iishy term. ll HHN llllllllllllllllllliflllllIlllllllfllllifllllllll'llllllI?llll1l,'E1Ill1lllffillllllllllllllflllllllflllllll,II1Il13IIlT1lQ'lll1,fillll11iilEllllllJ3llli1Il'NNT,IlNNNlfN3IliIliN1NNI5iilfllil!.QllllIlI'1lliq,'IIllll,.I!1!11ii,IIiN1l!lililll!!iY'3flUi!l?If!'lli,I,,IlTl,,,E!lll,ifIl!f,1i3!1lIi1 W!!!lllf,'!ll1f'Ti,l, lll1Ilil ,Wlf 'lfll1iI.'.ll!Q, !l!1, 1311 1111 l l1,'I1I IfIfl3 '1llll3 'lll,'llllllilllllll Wh NH ll W ll l63l

Page 66 text:

X XNNN M H 'NQN' N M N N N N H' :':1N' Nlxl' N'NN : ' 'N 'll' ' !l!1! N '3' 3 'ix' '1 'A NNN' ': ' ' ' ' N ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' 'Eh 'l l Q45 C7.4i0lfLl:6ilfl The Magic Crystal Here's Mucl in Your Eyes ffrhe Nose and Throat of the worlan By Dirl:-Digger' Dan Chief Prophet RUSSELL T. WERBY Assistant Prophets Arnold Adelman Charles Manning David Berquist Louis Gilman Leonard Cohen Bennett Katz Bernard Scotch Congress Thought Kidnaped WASHINGTON. - The capital was again at ease today after it was discov- ered that the rumor spread by page-bov Paul Hurley, was false. Hurley had claimed that Congress had been kidnaped by lobbyists Benjamin Lockhart and Irving Baker with the help of General Hartstone's army of street-cleaners. Citi- zens of Washington have become con- vinced of the truth of Hurley's statement by the strange silence at the capital. How- ever, the situation was relieved by Nor- man Sherman, secretary of the society for the Perpetuation of Perpetuating So- cieties for the Perpetuation of Perpetua- ting Perpetuation when he revealed that the eerie silence was due to the sound- proofing of the Capital by George Ruby, famous specialist on noise under, Project 1-2-3-4, hop, skip-jump-ring twice. Ruby, famous specialist on noise under Proiect collection boxes for churches, was hurried- ly interviewed by Charles Manning and James Looney, the Nation's star report- ers. Ruby, muttering something about Hcolossal nerve , finally admitted to the newspaper men that he was responsible for the unprecedented condition of silent senators and quiet congressmen. He told them, I didn't tell nobody about it this modest reference to the engineering feat? because nobody had the least idea that it would work. By way of reinforcing his statement he added, This was a gov- ernment job. Flash! it is rumored that J. Gersh, ap- prentice to ,the third assistant janitor is that way about a certain blonde dish- in which that Way washer in the local night club he works. She says sheis not about him. but it's this way-it's hard to understand which way they are about each other ...... Bob Howlett, trombone player in R.ubin's-off Ivory Soap-Box Orchestra is expected to middle-ailse it with the daughter of a well known marks- man ...... Garlic to Patrolman Hanley for giving a ticket to patrolwagon chauffeur Mike Bronchuck-Mike was only carry- ing out orders. He was hurrying to f'Cubby Williams betting parlor to place a two dollar bet on Phil Frankelsteirfs famous horse, Wahoo , for Police Com- missioner Cowitz, before the raid took place ...... Daisies to Paul Lifsitz for his convincing performance in f'Nine Fools on a Jackass, now playing at the Copley. Flash! Barbecue M. Cohen, famous Hollywood producer, seen in town incog- nito...L. Knoff dickering for a diamond cutting job with I. Findgold, well-known miner ...... Puppolo, the fiddler, drawing good pay playing nightly at Eddie Tanzer's Bluehill Avenue beer parlor, the Cuspidor. Sol Goldmants Irish Minstrels playing at a rival establishment, 'fRuss Singleton's Chinese Barbecue ...... Seen in town -- the relentless Z-man Shatz, who has com- pleted his new book, I Cover the Fish- pier on Fridays from 9-12, phone USMell Pu-ooo . The book is so realistic it smells. Ccqzctral Jacobs' Amateurs going over strong. He's now sponsored by Shatu- chny and Kelly Pickle Works ...... Flash! 3 bouncing boys bounced into the home of John Dwyer, but excused themselves for they really belonged to John's next door neighbor, Michael Donelan, famous Russian tenor-boy! Is he proud! ..., The time has come when all good men should come to their senses-so this Dirt Digger Dan is bidding you a fond farewell, until the next time those funny men in the white suits let me out. Ask the man who owns one Have you a TAITEL TIRELESS TEARING TOASTER Ask Miltonius Feinberg, world famous hunter- 'tAfter killing three hundred lions, I am tired-so I sit down and tear a toasted herring on a. f'Taitel Toaster. I'm happy when the Doctors blunder For when they're dead I put them under. GROSSMAN'S FUNERAL SERVICE Why not be buried on Grossman's Installment Plan? 3 months to pay or out you go! ll!! l it Vi! M M T Wi M H it VWil9VQ3 W , , l 97'i93'7ilil? i3williY3l57'll3ViWlli!VMNM?t9l!l9VWll ill ,Ml ,W , , , 62 ww: ww ,ut tt M!!!-vi, ,tt ,W mu 1, H ,vw !,!!.,,!! 1. ,u ll, ,Um , I 1

Page 68 text:

Will! W HH Hillllhllzllil..?11llli.1ltHH1 ,zwmtiillll ill ,i .,ilal...lill. lil!! 'lllllllllllllvllllllllllllllll illMll!.1lll' 11NlNNN1lM-.WHli.'lHH1l'1H.illklllllll l11NlNNL.lllllll3,!illlQilii.,1l1 ml' 'W lil '1Wl.w11NHinlllluillllllllilllll lllih NNH.I31lHH'HHlllHH'lilllllllxzalllll,Iiilll.'.'l!lis.Hi.I1Hu, W .IEDM:Wil'lilAillH11111l1lllllI11ll1lI'I3l!,IWWI'IlI'. 1l.'lIll'3I.'lil HNUHHM l H 'll Moustache Mystery Solved DANVERS.-Due to the untiring efforts of Curator John'V. Dwyer and caretaker McLaughlin, the intriguing mystery here at the Art Museum as to whom has been putting moustaches on the paintings has been solved. Dwyer and McLaughlin, be- lieving the moustaches to be the work of Irving Kalman and Paul Lifsitz, prominent propagandists for the House of David, maintained an all-night watch over the portrait of Mona Lisa, the only smooth- shaven picture now in the institution. Finally' at the stroke of midnight a fig- ure stealthily emerged from the shadows. and made its way to the portrait to which it immediately began to apply a bristling moustache. Seizing the despoiler while his superior groped for the light, McLaughlin found the arch-fiend to be none the other than Al Shaw , alias Abraham Schlossberg. Printing Plant Abandoned BOSTON.-Messrs. Berquist and Sjo- quist, owners of the Quist Press, today an- nounced the sale of their plant to John Contini and Peter Bruno at a price ad- mitted to be an extreme sacrifice. The owners told reporters that when, a few days ago, they discovered A. Cunningham, R. Busa, R. Tanner, N. Seltzer and G. DiLorenzo dismantling all the linotype machines in the building and attempt- ing to construct a robot printer capable of setting type by mental telepathy, they became completely disgusted and decided to give up the business. John Contini, spokesman for the amateur experimenters insisted when interviewed, i'Why didn't they mind their own business! We were only trying a noble experiment! '36 Goes Hollywood in Big Way BOSTON, MASS.-With a showering of confetti and sidewalk bricks, that 'fgem of purest ray serene, Danny fBoyJ Cline, bid farewell to his Boston public from the step of the Hollywood Flyer. Boston's gift to the ladies was brought into the focus of the spotlights from the dark unfathomed caves of ocean deep by that most eminent, colorful director, Mel Van Levins, while this rather exalted' personage was on an eastern scouting trip. Dapper Dan, alias Dangerous Dan, was selected from a group of theatrical aspirants including Peewee Danny Kline, facetious Al Abramson, and gallant, flourishing Lenny Cohen. The picture in which Dan is to star, The Return of the Thin Mani Scientists Prepare ' for Expedition FRANKLIN PARK AIRPORT, Franklin Park-J. McGillicudy Wallerstein is now polishing up the shiny hull of his imper- vium ship in preparations for his new flight to Morton Street. Wallerstein will lf, V up Y ' I, 'J -' ' 4 , K ' , ,f ffff' , ,- ,, .mfg -r1'fgf,, -1 . A ria' ' , l in , X .2 2 .H -le - qty' If ' Wy. 1. 1 v ' -- V dial g7f1?. N 1 l .J f ffl 1. have an enormous crowd of six people to watch him take off in this exceedngly diflicult trip. Accompanying him will be Max Taitel, Professor of Science who will take care of all the scientific instru- ments, and goofy gadgets. Prof. Taitel has a new theory on how to regulate traf- fic at Morton Street and hopes to find a proof for it on the trip. LATE NEWS FLASHES NEW ARRIVAL WELCOMED March 14, Sunnyside-Last evening the patrons of the Snyder Asylum 'were dis- turbed in the wee-wee hours by at new entry. He gave his name as Thoms. P. Q. X. Johnson. When asked his particular ailment, he replied, f'My job in the third national as potato boy is too much for me? LOCAL BOY KNOCKS THEM OFF Boston, Mass. - Professor Mike Kelly has at last gone out of business. He has deeded his dancing school over to that famous ballet dancer, Mr. Binyomin Katz. Mr. Katz is adopting a new system. He is using the glide method. He has had the kind thought to equip his teachers with lead shoes. He guarantees to teach any dance from the tango to the mazurka. l vmluwlul lMEMlfM.1..4 ..llil if.lil if?llilllif iiitllliiil lii? lli?lliii llif lllllilllllEllllEl Eill iii?l E3'ii l if?ll li.. Iil 5lll 33231 l iil lf?l llif? llii li lliiiiiiiiil lF l57 ll F73 lllif lEl l ff l lllilll ffll l llls? llFil V51ll WE l fi l lif ll if l l li??E33i lliiilliillEl T33 51 ll llfliififrltllllr iw lwlw ll E641