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Page 16 text:
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Senior Class Prophecy The year is 1981 and as we pull in on the four-lane, freshly graveled Rosalie spur we notice a sign “Rosalie— Population 50”. As we round the corner and pull down the street we immediately spot a large neon sign reading “Roge’s hair and Beauty Salon”, “free beer shampoo”. Toward the end of the street we see Mario Posvar, Header and Stock Car specialist, giving his assistant Jim (Fosbitus) Anderson instructions on cleaning windshields. As we round the corner we spot “Arden Enterprises- Tutoring and Computer Dating Service”. Waiting in front in his daily position stands Larry Pullen on his lunch break from P.B.P. (Pullen Beef Packers) to see what his catch for the day will be. Off to the right we spot a sign on which we see the words Clyde’s Cassino and Root Beer Palace. Just above is a giant flashing picture of a sparkling face resembling Col. Sanders, but we recognize it as the likeness of our old friend Clyde Marr. Stopping off for a cool one we notice standing near the door our old friend Okinowa Novak tipping a quart of the foamy brew. Clyde runs up, gives us a hearty slap on the back and leads us to the bar where he promptly chugged a quart in our honor. After finishing off a few foamy mugs over lively conversation, we decided we’d better be moving along. Turning our wheels toward home we were shocked when someone landed his plane on main street. As the door opens, a red carpet rolls out and our old friend Judy Nelson steps out in her leather jacket, flying scarf, and marine cadet hat. On her back we see TWA and we im- mediately remember her lifelong hope of being a stewar- dess. As we fly along the streets suddenly from behind we hear the blast of police sirens. Pulling off to the side we see the town cop pull in behind. Rod Nelson steps from his ‘75 Volkswagen Fastback that He’d received as a long awaited graduation present, and walks toward our car. At his side hangs a deadly thirty-eight, the bullet in his right shirt pocket. As he removes his hat we see that he is bald—a result no doubt from constant close hair- cuts. Monogrammed on his lapels we notice the in- scription “J. F. I wish” tattered with age. On our way out of town we see Larry Pullen carrying a case of candy to his Volkswagen Van. We see at a nearby bar, Jim Daggett, neatly dressed in his Marine uniform turning the pages of “A Book of the Groshea” by Roger Nelson. As we leave the outskirts of Rosalie we spot two nuns, but the shock is too much when we recognize Fay Brum- mond and Linda Canarsky staring from their habits. After leaving our amusing episodes in the city of big “R” we sail off into the setting sun. Last WiK and Testament Of the Distinguished Seniors of 71” I, FAY BRUMMOND, will and bequeath to everyone anything that comes natural and curse them with any- thing that doesn’t come natural. To my sister, Lea Ann, 1 will anything she gets, because whatever it is she deserves it. To all upcoming Junior High, I will the Stamina to stick to it, and never give up copying. 1, ARDEN CANARSKY, being of sound mind and body, do hereby bequeath my study hall desk to any lucky ju- nior who gets it, my stolen pencils and ink pens to any- body who has use for them, and last but not least my Business Law and Bookkeeping books back to Mr. Stans- berry, my history book back to Mr. Shockley, and my literature book back to Mr. Gray. 1» LINDA CANARSKY, Being of competent mind and adequate body, will and bequeath my shy, quiet ways to Lea Ann B., my athletic prowess to Kathy P., my in- tuitive knowledge of test questions to Vawn N. and Pam N. (who certainly need it!), to Shirley B. I leave the pa- tience that comes only after attending school for many years; and last and perhaps least 1 leave my ability to stay out of trouble to Carol D. To all those I have not mentioned 1 leave you with the immortal words of W. C. Fields, “If at 12
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Page 17 text:
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first you don’t succeed, try, try, again. Then quit. No use being a fool about it.” I, JAMES E. DAGGETT, being of stereophonic sound mind and body, do herewith bequeath to Kenty—my hand engraved map to “Big R”; my punting ability to Timmy (the toe) Copple; my keg draining ability to (Duce) Bussel- man; the hole in the music room to Mike Kinning and Rudolf miles who spent many nights with Visine in their sore red eyes; to Ramone, 1 leave two shotgun shells to use on Gene of Gene’s Drive-In; to Rick (Marlboro) Miles I leave a pair of snow goggles for hunting albino jackrabbits; my ability to roll cigarettes, and my monogrammed smoking jacket, to Steve (Aloma) Casey 1 leave my return trip ticket to Warsaw and a case of diarrhea to drink on the way, to Lee I leave my Jethro Bodine Book of Ciphering (a compass to find his head), and a cow catcher for his John Deere Car, to Mark L. I leave my love of Watka, and lots of ice to keep the blob from burning up, to Gray I leave a case of clothespins, to Mark W. I leave all the pity a man can show for a person in torture, and last but not least I leave to Gary A. and Craig Novak my new address in Lincoln and a complete schedule of activities. I, CLYDE MARR, do beaueath and will my keg-chugging abilities to Gary B.; my Laredo cigarette maker to my sis- ter, Pat; my supercharged ’59 Ford funny car to Sonny Ger- ber, to sell as a weekend special; my lifetime credit card at the Dog and Suds to Tim C.; and last of all, my abilities to charm Bancroft women to my (BIG!) brother Mike, who already does a better job than 1 do. 1, JUDY NELSON, being of little mind, will and bequeath my grades in Bookkeeping and Business Law to Vawn N. and Pam N.-who’ll need it!! Greta, my green Buick to my little sister “Suds”; my ability to have fun and stay out late to Diane Red; my position on the volleyball team to Timmy C.; my GOOD paying job at Rubik's Korner to any girl dumb enough to take it; my long hair to Steve C.; and my desk in studyhall to the first dumb Junior who can get it. I, RODNEY NELSON, do bequeath my athletic abilities to the Freshman class, ’cause they’ll need it; the ability to have good parties to the student body of Rosalie, especially when someone’s parents are gone for the weekend. My drum playing ability to Mark Lindholm and Craig Novak and anything else to who ever wants it. I, ROGER NELSON, being of weird mind and athletic body, do hereby bequeath the following: My electric hair- dryer and hairnets to Mark L. who will put them to good use; to Dennis Christ my ability to try to blow smoke rings; my athletic ability on the football field and basket- ball court to Tim Copple; my ability to see turkey buz- zards to Craig Novak; my gross remarks to the whole stu- dent body as there is a lot to go around; and last but not least my size 34 underwear to Allen Steinmeyer. I, KELVIN POSVAR, being of 80% Bud and 20% Schlitz, do bequeath my Ramrod Mercury to my brother, Gayle. My ability to beat Mr. Gray in the 50 yd. dash to Dennis Christ; I also leave the location of our local dump to the preceding Senior boys. I also bequeath my abilities as girl chaser to Tim Copple. I, LARRY PULLEN, being of confused mind and scarce body, do bequeath to Dennis Christ my “Big Red” socks; my naturally curly hair to Randy Miles; my ability to im- personate John Wayne to Tim Copple; my All-Star Wrestling Schedule to Gayle Posvar; my abilities in track to Steve Casey; my pig-sticker ability to Len (Bloat) Hermelbracht; and last but not least my ability to ref the volleyball net to Allen (Steiny) Steinmeyer. 13
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