Richard Montgomery High School - Rocket Yearbook (Rockville, MD)

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I told Joe that I had heard that Mutt” Price was making a hit in Hollywood and asked if he knew anything about it. Fisher replied that “Mutt” was the latest “sheik” in the cinema community and that he had just received a large contract to star in Mickey Mouse films. I also learned that the two Norris sisters were now starring in the movies under the title of the “Hold Dust Twins.” As we sat in the darkness of the early evening the moon slowly arose from behind the distant hills and as it slowly traversed the starlit sky we sat engrossed in the fond remembrances of our school days and in this time I learned of the destinies of the remainder of my classmates. Lucy Knight, pursuing her school day literary talents, was now writing tense narratives for dime novels. Since it is not considered becoming for a judge of my standing to visit the follies, I was greatly surprised to learn that Amelia and Mary Farmer were now chorus girls in Gene Gooding’s vanities. Jack Jones, now a big cheese in the Noiseless Mouse Trap industry, was having the production of his affairs strenuously opposed by Grace Murray, Edith Koiner, Ruth Pratt and Ella Bennett, who had established homes for blind mice throughout the country. The above mentioned ladies’ main objection to Mr. Jones’ wares was that their noiseless operation «1 id not give the mice a fair chance. Charles Merry, who had risen to the rank of Commandant in the Marines, had invented a non-explosive gunpowder which would make warfare safe, hut when war went out of fashion due to this creation and Mr. Merry saw the hearts of the militarists of many countries broken because they were deprived of their favorite pastime, he grew so despondent over the outcome of his handiwork that he shut himself up to make an invention which would revolutionize warfare. Dorothy King, school day secretary of the Sportsmanship Brotherhood, was now endeavoring to establish a chapter of that organization in the Zulu cannibal village while accompanying Theresa Coleman on a gorilla hunt in Africa. Our air-minded schoolmate, Bill Reading, had recently met with a slight accident when his curls accidentally became entangled with a rotating propeller, hut 1 was glad to learn that he was rapidly recovering under the watchful care of Virginia Barnsley and Julia Offutt, two distinguished nurses in the hospital where Bill was being treated. (I had never thought Bill would try to curl his hair in such a manner!) I was greatly surprised when Fisher informed me that one of the teams competing in the present typing marathon was made up of none other than Helen Lowe and Josephine Keys, who were pounding the keys at such a terrific rate that asbestos ribbon and fireproof paper had been resorted to, to prevent combustion and the machines were constantly sprayed with water to keep them from melting. I 27 i

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ill Physical Education, Rockville had won the recent state championships in both tiddle-de-winks and munibly-peg. Fisher said Mason stressed good posture at all times. Ruth Hoskinson was now instructing the girls' football and wrestling teams. I next learned that “Peg” Lohr and Margaret Dronenburg were now organizing a drive for the organization of the Citizenship Society in every American school and that Joe Peace, who bad become a fanatic on that subject, was assisting them greatly. 1 remarked that I bad heard of a Paris clothing company under the name of Himelright and had wondered if it might have any connection with our old pal “Woody” Himelright. Fisher said that “Woody” was president of the company which dealt in “Latest Parisienne creations for the feminine form.” Woody’s Rockville branch was doing a tremendous business with patronage from Melvina Henderson. Hinda Fraley, Betty Moulden and other debutantes. Lee Fisher. Hilda Starkey, Harriett Lewis and Gertrude Fox were engaged as models for filestore. When I inquired if Otis Beall had followed bis school day inclination for the dairy industry, 1 was informed that he was now the owner of one of the largest dairy corporations in the country and that Oda McGaha, following his longing for the West, was now a cowboy on one of Otis' big ranches. In the course of the next half-hour I learned a great deal. Shirley Prescott had turned a cold heart to all worldly interests and although she was now a tortoise-shelled-spectacled secretary she bad settled down into the career of an old maid, much to the disappointment of her many ardent admirers. The radio profession had gained two excellent performers in the form of “Crooning Joe” Steinburg and Emily Markland, who accompanied Steinburg on the piano. It had been reported that since Joe had started on bis career of groaning, all the institutions for insanity had noted a fifty percent increase in occupation. Joe Webster Price, newlv-eleeted chief of the H vattstown Fire Department, bad established a wonderful record, for on his way to a fire he had struck twelve pedestrians (killed eight, crippled four), four lamp poles, seven automobiles and eleven push carts, and after quenching the fire it was discovered that two pieces of furniture were uninjured, one wall had not been broken and the water had not drenched the parlor sofa. Joe bad narrowly escaped being one of the unfortunates in the path of Joe Webster’s “Flying Ford.” Fisher, who was enjoying this overture of our classmates as much as I. now drew forth a picture from his pocket, and offering it to me inquired if I recognized the figure I saw on it. 1 said 1 understood the costume of the person to be that of a minister but that I could not quite recognize the face, although it seemed familiar. Fisher snickered and then to my utter amazement told me that the quiet figure I beheld was none other than “Jim” Floyd who had donned the ecclesiastical robes and was now on a missionary expedition in the Hobo Islands. 1 received another shock when I was told that Ruth Lampton was his devoted follower. As Joe was quite tired from this long narration we stopped our discussion long enough to swallow our dinner pills and then when we had allowed our meal to digest, we once more continued our talk on the cool veranda. I so I

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I was sorry to be informed tlmt two of our class. Ruby Curtis and Edith Carey, had gone the way of all nerve wreckers. They were now engaged as telephone operators in Rockville and were energetically discovering new connections for wrong numbers. Incidentally a short time after they had received their positions as telephone operators, Ruby and Edith had founded a new Rockville newspaper called The Open 11 ire which somehow managed to collect the most intimate bits of news. Oertrude Clagett and Ella Linthicum. who were efficient listeners of the “Elderly Maids Chatter and Stitch Club,” had received the positions of chief editors of this paper. For some time after we had finished our review of our classmates, Fisher and I sat peacefully in the darkness, the happy memories of our school days bearing lightly on our minds. There was, however, one question which troubled me and after some consideration I asked Fisher bow be came to be in such a forlorn position as he now seemed. “Well,” he said at length, “It’s a long story. Some time ago ‘Sleepy’ Nichols patented some of his famous insomnia tablets but when they were lirst placed on the market they were not a very great success and “Sleepy, broken hearted, vanished from his friends' sight. A few months ago. however, the public realized the true value of his discovery and the pills sold in miraculous quantities and ‘Sleepy’ is now worth millions. As I was a Boy Scout in my boyhood days 1 have taken it upon myself to hunt Clarence down and have the pleasure of spilling the good news to him. I have hunted far and low so far and am pretty sure 1 will come upon him soon.” For some time we sat in darkness, but at last Fisher stated in a low voice, “You haven’t told me what your success is due to vet.” Slowly I stood up and smilingly drew myself to my full height of seven and one-half feet. Then, in a meek voice I humbly confessed the secret of my success, “I owe my success to the constant use of Leava-Shine Tooth Paste.” Irvin Brookk. ( 2S |