Reading Memorial High School - Pioneer Yearbook (Reading, MA)

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J OUR ALPHABET

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PAGE FOURTEEN THE PIONEER still in class : ‘What’s in the sandwiches?’ — just like that, imagine it! Well, she didn’t notice what he said, so she said: ‘It’s a fish chowder over there in the cooler’. So he tried again: ‘What’s in the sandwiches?’ She didn’t again, so she said: ‘There they are right under your elbow on the platter’. So he said: ‘What’s in the sandwiches?’ That time somebody caught the idea: ‘Meat’. And then, you know, he took a bite, and couldn’t help but laugh, because, you see, the sandwiches were lettuce and mayonnaise”. R. H. S. SONGLAND Wake Up, Children, Wake Up ... General remarks of teachers I’m Afraid to Go Home in the Dark . .... Stanley Low Dancing Footsteps ..... Hazel Hach I’ll Close My Eyes to the Rest of the World . Lyman Belknap in class Here Comes the Showboat .•. The Operetta Missouri Squabble .. The Orchestra Only Making Believe .. Franklin Burnham Little Pal . Latin Companion Happy Days are Here Again.Vacation Lonely .... Students in the Math IV Class Melancholy . Helen Colley (?) Dixie Jamboree .. Senior Class Meeting Georgia Pines .Theme Song of the Commercial Geography Class Chant of the Jungle . Music Once in a Lifetime . No Assignments In the Hush of the Night . Latin 3 and 4 Homework being done Bigger and Better .. The Traffic Squad Turn on the Heat ... General Remarks to Tiny She’s So Unusual . Gertrude MacAuley I Can’t Remember the Words . Philip Parker reciting in French My Fate is in Your Hands .... Mrs. Mingo arrives at an inopportune moment I May Be Wrong .. Carney To Be Forgotten ... Detention Room A. T. and V. W. ’30.

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PAGE SIXTEEN THE PIONEER YE WHIRLPOOL OF KNOWLEDGE Question: Is world disarmament possible ? Answer: It is possible but not prob¬ able. If the seeker of knowledge cares to listen to Philip Parker and Stanley Low, he will receive much illumina¬ tion on BOTH SIDES of the question. Question: I am a love-sick young man infatuated with a beautiful girl. I am dying a slow death because she spurns all my advances. What shall I do ? Answer: Ordinarily Ye Master Mind does not answer questions of love or the future. However this is clear, if you are as bad off as you claim, you had better hasten your slow death by jumping under the first auto you see. I wish you the best of luck and hope the auto is moving fast enough to kill you instantly. Question : I have a very fine young lady with whom I have kept company for a long time. Her parents are very strict, however, and compel her to be home by 11:00. What shall I do? Answer: It is hard to believe that such a state of affairs could exist in this modern world. The best remedy I can suggest is that during the day¬ light saving of summer months you should set your watch back an hour and go by standard time. Perhaps your ingenuity will suggest a similar method for the winter. Question : Of what use is an alarm clock ? Answer: Ye Master Mind is con¬ vinced than an alarm clock is an in¬ strument of torture. Although the guillotine immediately puts its victims out of all their miseries, the alarm clock brings its audience into the rout¬ ine and troubles of a new day. Ye Master Mind urges an “Anti-alarm clock society” for the prevention of cruelty to humans. Question: What are “wise cracks”? Answer: Ye Master Mind says that a “wise crack” is an instantaneous thought which the originator thinks is a witty remark. Of course we can’t guarantee the effect it has on the people around. WE SUGGEST THAT: Gertrude MacAuley wear a bathing suit to Chemistry. Dorothy Berle dress at home. Two certain young men pay less at¬ tention to their “water waves”. Allan Temple study his French. Newer and snappier records be bought for the type-room. Arlene Browne use her telephone less. Kenneth Larrabee cease to be such a desperate woman-hater. Midyear and final exams be omitted. Earline Austin bring a couch to History. The Orchestra tame those “Wild Horses”. More contributions to the Pioneer be passed in. A skidding contest be held. Several have been getting a lot of practice lately. Lyman Belknap cease driving his car with the back curtain down. Sully use “horsemen” instead of stumbling with “cavalry”. Truesdell Fife study to be an orator. Mr. Gates tabulate in his vade me- cum the notations that hedonism is not the modern Zeitgeist and that the prevalence of epizooty among equine quadrupeds is extreme solely in entre-pots. Really though, Mr. Gates, we’re suggesting that you keep out of the dollar and a quarter words in class. William Burpee be called “Precious”. Talbot Emery take home a Latin book at least once a month. Helen Tibbetts do a type exercise right the first time. Ham Burgess join the Boy Scouts. Stanley Low and Marion Hilts learn a new dance step before the next dance.