Reading Memorial High School - Pioneer Yearbook (Reading, MA)

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Page Twenty-eight The Pioneer sentinel tramp. Up and dow he goes until silence reigns when he seeks five minutes’ peace. At this time I felt the need to try an¬ other subject so I turned to the stop en¬ titled “Musical.” I had an idea that perhaps Professor A. F. Simpson could be found here. Yes, he could and was. M}r. Simpson is now a great organist known the town over. At the same time I met Mr. Paul Wil¬ son who plays a real violin in a real or¬ chestra. I hear he gets his full meal every time he plays! We next come to one of the most humorous subjects in the whole list. It is the case of Captain Walter C. White. He is shown in full regalia of his rank as captain of the Rear Admiral’s Horse Marines. As Mr. White is very hungry he is dreaming of our classmate Mr. Walton “Fish” “Sugar” Crocker, the versatile ba Iketball-er-manufacturer of Ashkosh County, Arkansas. Near Mr. Crocker resides Mr. Richard Cummings, the celebrated eye-opener for near-sighted potatoes. Mr. Cummings is kept very busy in spite of his rather common profession. It was at Albermarle, Ohio (paging Mrs. Davis), that I found our friend Mr. Winthrop Cuteliffe. Mr. Cutcliffe as you perhaps know, is now the head of the Waiters’ Union of America. He has offices at his mammoth Ocean View Inn at Albermarle. Mr. Cutcliffe has a very able and effi¬ cient secretary, Miss Aldana Burrows. Miss Burrows has charge of all secre¬ tarial and clerical work done in the Wait¬ ers’ Union. A very high and respected position. Perhaps you didn’t know in ’26 we had a poetess in our midst. However, we did, and now we can claim as our own Miss Margaret Babine, the world-renowned lyric poet. Miss Babine is shown now putting atmosphere into a stone-age poem. In the same house with Miss Babine resides another giant, Miss Helen Dick¬ inson. Miss Dickinson has just been pre- ented a solid zinc medal for proficiency in Auto-painting. You know its all the rage now. She takes after her father. From there I skipped back to New York where by means of my wonderful camera I was able to photograph Mr. Fletcher Eames, the second Earl Carroll, at his domestic study of washing the dog in the sink. He had quite a write-up in the papers about it. It w r as in New York that I came across Mr. William Gaw T , the sole proprietor of the Hayseed Center combined Haber¬ dashery and Cafeteria. Mr. Gaw was then engaged in taking stock of the score for the rush season. He had already purchased the necessary 3 sets of overalls and two plows. While in New York I heard of the im¬ pending arrival of Miss Francis Porch so with all haste I rushed down to the dock via the camera and there I had quite a surprise. I met Chief Engineer Albert Hodson. Mr. Hodson had been testing his self-inking oil can and was quite overjoyed. As I turned to leave this interesting scene I came lens face with a very familiar figure. It vcas Mr., or rather Deacon Hook. Harlan is now president cf the Watch and Word Plus Society and was just reconnoitering. He was engaged in questioning Mr. Wendell Horton, the promising young journalist. Mr. Horton now has ab¬ solute rule over every corner from West to Forty-ninth Streets. I next turned the lens back to Reading. Here I found many of our former class¬ mates. The first was Miss Helen Badger, the dancer. Miss Badger is now teaching aesthetic dancing. She had quite a fol¬ lowing now T . At Reading High I found Madame Reed who is now teaching Franc ais. Miss Reed speaks French so fluently that even the French cannot understand her. From this department I went to the English classrooms and found Miss Louise Richardson in charge. This lady now teaches all the Freshmen and she looks all w r orn out. If she had had us to teach she would have been totally worn out. From Reading High I skipped to the Abbott-Porch School of Medieval Plumb¬ ing which is located in North Reading. It now has a total enrollment of 13 in-

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The Pioneer Page Twenty-seven chilling I mean in more ways than one because Sir Thomas is now official door tender and taxi caller for Henry Ford’s Submarine Taxi Service. But the greatest figure in our class, without doubt, is Miss Frances Fowler. Miss Fowler, to use her maiden name, is of majestic proportions, a massive figure, figuratively speaking. She is now run¬ ning a home for demented basketball players. Always full, too, of course I mean the home. Another majestic figure is that of Professor Henry Carleton, C. U. The C. U. stands for Culinary Artist, at which profession Henry ranks second to none. E. H. S. is very lucky to have Henry as senior chef. The fourth person of considerable equitorial protuberance to be seen is Mr. Ernest Gaw, Athletic Coach par excel- lance. Mr. Gaw is now devoting his entire time to the advancement of the noble games of marbles. The next group to be investigated is in a class by itself. This is the list of Private Secretaries—plus which we had in our class, together with other places of business: Miss Phyllis Clark—The I Bunkam Co., Beal Estate. Miss Nelcena- Copeland—Francis Brothers’ Pharmacy. Miss Leone Doucette—B. H. S., the second. Miss Dorothy McClintock—Boston Ele¬ vated Subway Co. Miss Marion Meuse—booking agent for Meuse Troupe of Giant Acrobats. Miss Dorothy Cronin—has charge of the great 13 book memorial library at Beading. Any of these can be guaranteed to mis¬ place, lose, forget, and neglect each and every note which they are trusted with. The next knob to the “ Secretary” one happened to be the one labeled “Beach” so I turned to it thinking as I did that is was rather foolish to expect anything in this direction; but, no, I was amply repaid because I found a Mr. Henry Lyman who was in my class of ’26. He is now a life saver at Bex Beach and re¬ ceives on the average of three hundred and eight proposals a century, especially from school teachers. Not far from this beach there was a famous summer resort. In this resort there is a hill. On this hill there is a path. On that path I found Miss Elea¬ nor Fultz. She is now the travelling companion to a widow Malore, who weighs at present two hundred and eighty-five. Next we discover Miss Doris Goddard in a pure white uniform creating teeth for those who have none left. Miss God¬ dard, D. D. S., is now the foremost bi¬ cuspid artist in the country. As I passed from place to place I felt the desire to take a peek at my old high school. So I turned to it and there I had one of the surprises of my life. I turned just in time to see Miss Edith Mellen touch a match to a long fuse which came from under the building. You know her ambition was to finish school. The sight of this, so struck me with remorse that I turned to Paris, France, to seek consolation. As I turned up and down the streets I suddenly came upon a familiar figure. It was that of Miss Shirley Upton, the internationally known buyer. She was here to chose from a complete stock of new styles for Ameri¬ can use. In Toujours, France, I ran across Miss Katherine Sweetser who now dictates what the fashionable people shall wear. She has one of her many mansions here in this beautiful little village. You know she rules the society world on both sides of the drink. From France I journeyed to Arabia where I found Shiek John Spear. The Shiek was then setting out on a three days’ journey around the world. He had the most wonderful tent I have ever seen, solid concrete. He spends his time now travelling. But the record for travelling is un¬ doubtedly ' held by Miss Jeanette Under¬ wood. Each day she does at least three hundred miles. The peculiar part is that she always ends at the same place. She now is head of a great taxi company. The second prize for distance covered goes to Mr. Boyd Stewart, whom I found at his home at Squeeclunk, Mo. Every night Mr. Stewart starts at one end of the hall and then back in a monotonous

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The Pioneer Page Twenty-nine dueling the teachers. After this I turned to Boston for prospects. In this city I saw the firm of Maxwell, Maxwell and Maxwell, elec¬ trical contractors. Unluckily Mr. Max¬ well was out but I was able to see the concern. The next person I perceived was Mr. Bussell Meikle, the lecturer and traveller. Mr. Meikle has kept a record of one set of his journeys which I believe would be very interesting, but as this is his per¬ sonal diary I doubt if we can see it. In Notabigga Park in Attabasco, Ver¬ mont, I first saw our man of leisure, Mr. Frank Norton. Mr. Norton w T as at that time bound for South America for the winter. With him was Mr. Lawrence Parte’ow who also was journeying south for the winter. Mr. Partelow has quite a few residences along the route. He blows bubbles for a living now. Perhaps yuu don’t know that Miss Elizabeth Berry is now making good as a big game hunter in the wilds of Bhod-: Island. She has just presented three skins of rare ring-tailed whoopenblatt to the Governor! Cur cute Miss Alice Englund, the financial wizard, now holds an office open on Canal Street, Boston, where she is showing Ponzi the dust. Leave it to Alice. Another person who is a P. C. A. is Miss Constance Hendon. In fact, she has her alcove on the forty-third story of the Woolv orth Building; that’s how high sne is getting. Miss Doris Kenney, with no ambition, is at home doing cross-word puzzles, in a cnair filled about her with cobwebs. One of our classmates washed to become President of the United States. Well all I can say is that Miss Merrill is now Pres- of the er- United States- Tooth¬ pick Company! But, as time presses, I will merely record the names of some of the other classmates, together with their businesses. Miss Hazel Morrison—B. M. steam¬ ship line. Miss Evelyn Lev ' is—The ‘ 1 Beadem and Weep” Joke Book Pub. Co. Miss Frances Mclntire—A Shaunessy’s laundry. Miss Mabel Merritt—Merritt’s Anti¬ que Furniture Manufacturing Company Miss Margaret Fitzpatrick—Demon¬ strator in a famous New 7 York reducing parlor. This last bit is perhaps out of the true prophecy line, but I hereby prophesy that if you, as individuals, will live up to the words of this following, you will make your lives a success: If any little word of ours can make one life the brighter; If any little song of ours can make one heart the lighter; God help us speak that little word and take cur bit of singing, Ai cl drop it in some lonely vale, and set the echoes ringing. John B. Howard, Junior, ’26. ©I)? ffllass ffitU In the name of yeomen, this twenty- fourth day of June, in the year of our Lord, one thousand nine hundred and twenty-six, we the Class of 1926, of the town of Beading, County of Middlesex, State of Massachusetts (and according to some of the faculty, of the state of coma), being aware of the uncertainties of life, and not unmindful of the fact that our four years of school activity are past, but of sound mind and memory, do make and declare this to be our last will and testament, in manner following, to wit: First, We give, devise and bequeath unto the school and faculty, our sincere thanks, not only for our education and culture, but for the patience they have shown in drilling and hammering that education and that culture into our so- called minds: to have and to hold unto said school and faculty, their heirs and assigns forever. Second, We give, devise, and bequeath unto ourselves, despite all contrary talk of taking things with us after death, the memories of our four years, something which we can give to no one, something wilich belongs to us, and which we hereby give to ourselves. The memory of how