Quincy High School - Goldenrod Yearbook (Quincy, MA)

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Miss Bailey—What were the immediate results of Caesar’s death: Pupil (hesitating)—A funeral. Miss K (Chairman of Class)—I don’t know what it is myself. What shall I do Miss Davidson? Miss D—When a teacher doesn’t know something, she asks the class. Heard in History—Every two years one-third of the Senate expires. Young (In history)—John Brown was finally captured and then hung. That was the end of him. Miss Freeman—What is the American Federation of Labor? Blake—Why the American Federation of Lovers is— Miss Giles (Criticizing Heap's recita- tion)—You couldn’t get that any more wrong if you tried. That was very well dene. Miss Bailey—Who knows Whittier’s “Snowbound”? Voice—Is he? Miss Galleher—A la bonne heure. Pupil (translating) Good for you. Heap (in history)—A slave was counted as three-fifths of a population. MacLeod—The postal officials were getting rich by raising the postage. Widlund (in history)—One of the prob- lems of reconstruction was the demoral- ization of the Army. Pupil (slowly translating)—Speaking lo his husband— Miss Freeman (Illustrating a point in history)—Let us take these three people here. Sometimes it is easier when you have something concrete before you. Found on a English History test paper —Edward III would have been King of France if his mother had been a man. Miss Galleher (to pupil in French)— Say it in English and keep close to French. An illustration of simile—Just as roll- ing stones gather no moss; so rolling dice gather no money. Freshman (browsing in the library)— “Last Days of Pompeii” What did he die of? Wise Senior—Oh, some kind of an eruption. Teacher (to a pupil after explaining a proof in geometry)—Now you go to the board and go through it. Miss Freeman—How did they raise an army in the late war? Widlund—The army was raised by sub- scription. Solomons (in English)—The route was an open plain cn horseback. Miss Freeman—What did the Shipping Board do during the late war? Foster—The Shipping Board made a lot of wooden ships that weren’t any good. Found in a secretary's report—The homework is to write an oral theme. Oliver Merrill Joke Editi r

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25 THE GOLDEN-ROD Poor Excuse Miss Thompson—Berman, you were late this morning. Where’s your excuse? Berman—Yes’m. We’ve got a new baby at our house. Miss Thompson—Well, don’t let it happen again. Mr. Collins—Where were you born? Maiden—Maine. Mr. Collins—What part? Maiden—All of me, of course. Miss Freeman—Don’t argue with me. Everything you say is going in one ear and coming out the other. Mac—That’s because there’s nothing in between to stop it. Teacher {who, after collecting the test papers, finds one with no name)—Whose paper is this? Pupil—'The name is on the paper. Teacher—It’s obliterated. Pupil—I beg your pardon; it’s Murphy. T.—Why don’t you talk louder when you recite? P.—A soft answer turneth away wrath. A parallel is two lines which never meet unless they are bent. (From Gould's paper.) Freshie—What do you have the first thing in the morning? Senior—Breakfast, little one. What are the rates at your hotel? Two dollars up to twelve. How much up to half-past nine? Miss Jones—This makes four times I’ve had to make you stay this week for being late. What have you to say to that, John? John—I’m glad it’s Friday. “Not Far Off At That” Miss Johnson—The Ku Klux Klan marks a new error (era) in the national government. Real Industrious Saylor—Who are you working for, Ber- man? Berman—My father. Saylor—What’s he do? Berman—Nothing. The First Football Game Wend. (translating Latin)—Then the anchor secured the ship by its fluke. Olson—They were lucky to get to land. . .—Why? Olson—Why, they got there only by a fluke. J. J.—Or perhaps two flukes. Mr. J.—Can you decline hug, Miss Boshan? Emily—No, I never decline it. On stude’s test paper: “Please write more legibly.” The next day stude went to Mr. Webb and asked: “Mr. Webb, what is that you wrote on the back of my paper?” Gems from Exams. Architecture in the beginning was heavy pillows. The school board repairs schools, ob- tains teachers, and sees that they are heated. Ford—Did you hear about the fellow at our garage who threw benzine into the fire? Flagg—No. What happened? Ford—Well, lie’s never ben zine since. Miss Giles—If you want to make a hit you must strike out for yourself. Thompson—Just a minute, Miss Giles. You’re mixed up in your baseball talk. If you strike out you can’t make a hit. Young—What’s the home work in F rench ? Al—Nothing. Young—Well, I’ve done it for once. “Did you give up anything during Lent, Sid? Sid—“Sure, hopes of graduation.”