Princeton University - Nassau Herald Yearbook (Princeton, NJ)

Page 12 text:

The Nassau H erald of forty-seven miles. And one day the Newark Sunday Call announced the marriage of the lady to the antique-and Love's young dream was shattered. Alas! Never rnind, Nor- man. just wait until you're fifty-eight. josh Brush has also had his little heart throbs. Every- thing was coming along nicely until last year, when the lady suddenly changed her mind and married the other man. Josh received a picture postal from her during the honey- moon. It read: Dear josh: Are having a fine time. Wish you were with us. It is an awful bore for Philip, to have to see that the bags are checked. W'e now approach Frank Keen, of the captivating blue eyes. Frank decided one day in December that he would like to go to New York-but it happened to be raining and he didnlt want to get wet. Suddenly an idea struck him. He went out into the hall and called over the banisters to the-he called to the-why, he called to the janitress. Ch, Kitty-I mean Mrs. Stevenson ?', Yiss, Mr. Keen. Have you got an umbrella you could loan me ? Yiss, sir. So Frank gave her three cents, took the umbrella, went to the city, and-lost it! But on his return to Princeton, having lost the umbrella, of course he couldn't return it-so he bought Mrs. Stevenson a pair of rubbers. Jack McDonald is a C.E. He doesn't get much chance for general culture of the brain in his curriculum so he tries to get some general knowledge by reading Current Events, the Literary Digest, the headlines of the New York Evening Journal, and questioning A.B. students. The other day he looked up from his Mechanics, and quite unexpectedly, said to his room-mate: Say, Squire, who's Pope now P Who's Pope? Why Pius X, of course. Well, who's this Pope Toledo I hear people talking about ? Rip Ropes heard the last rendition of Wagner's opera, Parsifal, in New York. Rip didn't learn much about the IO

Page 11 text:

Waslimgtonk Birthday Omtion brother sat below in the cabin and ran the launch. Brother had strict injunctions never to come up on deck before an- nouncing his ascent by the ringing of a bell. I wonder why. Eli Ogden dropped into a room full of seniors a couple of weeks ago, Anybody want a syllabus in history F No, Nop, No, Not to-night, um umf' etc. What's the matter, fellers ? said Eli, didn't write it!', Johnnie Scull is famous for his well known facial re- semblance to a member of the Faculty. Last Fall a freshman actually came up to him and said, Oh, Professor, will you please give me the Latin assignment for Monday ? Johnnie Scull's room looks like the office of the Editor of Town Topics with the-girls-all-call-me-Otto Sprague playing the part of the lady typewriter. Every few minutes there is a knock upon the door and the latest scandal of the Campus comes through the letter slot, Jimmie Blank and Billy Dash were just seen walking across the Campus! What can they be hunching ? says John, there must be a deal on. For why should they walk together if there weren't. Who ever walks together unless there's a deal on? I never do. Mercy, Gtto, make some tea. I must keep my nerves up ! It all happened in Newark, N. J., by the shores of the gleam- ing Passaic. Norman Carroll thought he had at last discov- ered his I-deal. Back and forth for months went the billets- doux. I-Iere's a specimen of the correspondence: Dear i I cannot tell you how I love you. Yet if I do not tell you how I love you, how will you ever know how I love you. Please answer in your next. Yours without a struggle, u NORMAN. For one year Norman kept the Horists and confectioners open on Broad Street and then-curses!-the villain entered. I-Ie was fifty-eight years old, and patted Norman on the head when the lady introduced them. I-Ie began to put in a strong bid for the maiden, and Norman being in Princeton most of the time was at a disadvantage, having to compete at a distance 9

Page 13 text:

Washingt01t's Birthday Omtion opera, but he knows all about the girl who sat next to him. You know the performance of Parsifal takes five hours, Rip says: I started to bicker with her right after the opening chorus. She dropped her opera glasses and I heard them drop, and so I picked them up and said, Are these your opera glasses, and she said, Yes That was right after the open- ing chorus, and as the opera lasts five hours, Rip had four hours and Hfty minutes to make good. And he did! I tell you it's very few of us who can compete with Wagner. While at the Northfield Conference with the Philadelphian Society this summer, Bill Ottinger went out on the river with another fellow in a sailboat. Quite suddenly the sky darkened, a squall came up, the waves dashed higher and higher, and the boat rocked fearfully. Bill, said the other fellow tragically, if this keeps up, she's going over. Neither of us can swim. Bill, in a few min- utes, both of us will be in Heaven. Bill, at the tiller, said, God forbid. Have you ever had tea at Freddie Stohlman's? Well, Fred- die gives the flossiest teas in college. It is raining steadily outside. It is four o'clock. VVe knock at the door of 64 Blair: Why, come in, wonlt you. Let me take your slicker . . . . Do step into the study. Fearfully wet outside, isn't it PU The study is done in neutral tints of green, and dec- orated with high art pictures. There is a very dim religious light furnished by an antique Roman lamp. I-Iow will you have your tea? Lemon or cream-Sh I-a little cognac P-two lumps ?-Will you light your cigarette at the lamp please-it is a custom we have here. At this point Harry Black is discovered through the gloom vigorously engaged in puffing on an unlighted cigarette. Fred- die sits down and says, Well, I-Iarry, have you been reading any 'Oscar Wilde' lately F Yes, F reddieg I have ust finished Lady Windimereis Fan. f'And how did you like it, I-Iarry P Well, I'll tell you Freddie. It was clever, scintillating, bril- liant, marvellously witty and perfectly ridiculous! II