Princeton University - Nassau Herald Yearbook (Princeton, NJ)

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H Washington's Birthday Oration O fudge !', said the Boller -KI could do something real desperate. That awful person, Elliott fyou will pardon me, sir-I am quoting? Thank youj only gave me 98? in Wood- row's course V, Too bad, that! Why I suppose that it will bring the record of his whole college course down as low as 99.4411 pure! But it is peculiar what strange things sometimes happen around the campus. Now there is Brown Hall-wonderful place, Brown Hall! All the literary lights in college reside within its sacred precincts-save one. The exception? Why Arthur B. Reeve, of course, the talented author o-f that touching ditty entitled My Pipe, or How to Look Happy though Seasickf' No, but Brown Hall has the same kind of a hold on the literary talent of the University as The Daily Prmoetonicm has on the Monday Night Club. You guessed it, Brute Hodgman: a strangle hold. Well, as I started to say, in the spring, when the fires of countless keg parties burn as guiding beacons in Potterfs Woods, when Hank Reynolds and Normie Donald, Eddie'7 Loucks and Red Green may be seen stealing surreptitiously past the French Club- armed with tin cups and a strong thirst, ther-e congregate on the ixerrace, back of Brown Hall, various groups of intrepid swains holding sweet communion with such fair damsels as beautify the str-eets of Princeton of an evening and have lain among the potsi' by day. Sitting on the fire escape outside- my window one night last May, I could not but hear the following conversation, rising from below: Now, Mr. Tillinghast, do try to behave yourself! No, you must not! Donit do that-now you stop! O! please stop- you're hurting me-O! DON'T! Look here, woman, broke in Tiddle's raucous voice, if you donit shut up I will stop I There was a long, long silence. rs No one ever found any such silence in the vicinity of Al. Schultz. The other day some girl told me a frightful tale of suE-ering and torture. Do you know, she said, I think you college men can be real cruel! Mr. Jess told me that Mr. Dana and Mr. Robinson and Mr. Stratton and some other great, big brutes locked little 20

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fAt this point a messenger boy handed a telegram to Mr. Hibbenj, Ah! something for Otto Hack, I see. He is too far away, I expect I had better read it aloud. Ottois life is so- far beyond reproach that he could not object. Heavens! can I believe my eyes? - LAUREL IN THE PINES, LAKEWOOD, N. J., February 2261, 1903. Otto Hack, No. 6' West Brown, Princeton, New Jersey: Hope you missed your train. Miss you awfully. Good luck. EM. AND M11.LY. I wonder what that can mean? O! yes! I remember Jim Eddy telling me some scandal about Otto. It seems that Otto went to a concert at Lakewood the other evening. After the concert he received a daintily scented note requesting his pres- ence in the Ladies' Cafe. He Went. This is the result. They Were very kind to him-f'Em.9' and Milly,'-but Otto is an engaged man and it looks bad, I can only Wonder what would have happened if Otto had missed his train. Otto asked me, beseeched me, last night, to say nothing of this incident. For,'7 he explained, one of the ladies is closely connected with Mrs. George Gould, and I would hate to have my name get into Town Topics. He need not be ashamed, it was not his fault. How can he help being so attractive? The story about Billy Mixsell reminds me of one on Ran- dall. The other eveningfafter the concert of the Musurgia, Randall took the Club up to the grill room, but when he got them there, he found that he had no money. He spied Ike Hustead. Ike is easy, he said to himself and braced the unsuspecting victim of this hold-up, forthwith. Lend me a quarter, Ike, he said, I Want to set up the Musurgiaf' Modest desire! Almost as modest as 'Tolerj' Ho-vvell's. Poler', rushed around to the ohices the other day to get his marks. I met him coming out, his face as long as one of Harold Nevins' hot-air spiels. What?s the matter, 'Poler ?' N I asked, sympathetically. 19

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Mr. Schultz and a Mr. Eddy in a room together, and Mr. Jess said that when they went away these men shouted through the door: 'Therel darn you! Talk each other to -death !' I do not know whether Floyd Hurlbut ever got a chance to go that far or not. I do remember, though, coming upon his roommate, Clarence G-arbrick, one day, leaning over the radiator in the lobby of the library almost dotty from the heat. Why, what in the World are you doing, Clarence P I asked. He roused himself and turned a pair of blood-shot, Horton- brand eyes on me. Floyd has been away for a week now and I got kind of lonely, so I came over here to breathe in the hot air, it makes me feel almost as if I were listening to him againf' Such a materialization of the spirit of Bill Boys would have to be made elsewhere than in a Turkish bath, Bill doesn't use them. One day, however, he was backed up in a corner by an acute attack of Piel and was engaged in drinking his way out., Jack Ireland and Roderick Barnes happened in at about th-at time, looked him over, and sat down. ffBill immediately started to entertain by retailing a retrousse story that had done service at the time of the entrance of the Israelites into the promised land, New Y-ork. It .was one of the brand that The Tiger does not print, and before he had gone very far, Roderick shut him up sharp. When he and Jack left, the latter gave expression to his astonishment at the unaccountable conduct of Roderick. O, that's all rightf' apologized the latter. I've heard the story before and can tell it better myself, anyhow. Sit down -and Iill give it to youf' A Did anybody ever see Jim Miller without his hatband? I believe he wears it to bed with him, if so, he ought to have insomnia something sublime. An any rate, this fetish worship of his got him into an altercation with the Cap and Gown Com- mittee. They' got him one day and led him to the slaughter. When he had been measured for his gown, Dibby Baird asked him his hat size. Now, our handsome member of the chosen race had demurred at the gown, because it would hide his stylish and 21