Potter School - Shield Yearbook (San Francisco, CA)

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THE POTTER SHIELD Teacher: Do you smoke cigarettes? . Pupil Ctremblingj: I do-a-little-sir. Teacher: Then give me one, I left mine on the desk. -1,ll.11-iff Wife of Mormon to doctor who is attending her husband: Do YOU think heis badly off? Doctor: Yes, the end is not far off. . I Wife: But do you think I should be at the bedside during his last moments? Doctor: Yes, but I advise you to hurry-the best places are taken already. Perpetual motion, we have here, Yes, at last itls come- See that darling little dear Chewing, chewing gum. In spite of his mamma's appeals, Little Ben bolts all of his meals. Then to show it doesn't hurt Eats some nuts for his dessert- Nuts and bolts when in solution Build an iron constitution. .ll..l.-- Gibbons: I've just figured out how Venus de Milo came to lose her arms. Pillsbury: How? Gibbons: She broke them off trying to button her shirt waist up the back. First Student: Did you get the third problem? Second Student: No. First Student: How near were you to the right answer? Second Student Qthinkingbz Five seats away.-Yale Record. I hear she is going to marry a famous aviator. Yes. First time a queen ever took an ace. -Yale Record. You know, I think the day the prodigal son came back must have been an awfully slippery one. Why so? Because the Bible says that when his father came out to welcome him, he fell on his neck. -Ex. . 'WVhy is a slacker like a lemon meringue pie? Because he is yellow all the way through, and hasn't the crust to go over the top. -Ex. V Diner: Noodle soup, veal with tomato sauce, and a cream puff, please. Waiter: Bowl of submarines, camouflage the calf, and heave me 3, Custard grenade.-Ex. : Seventy-eight . H, cw 'ff' a Wifi f ' ww ' kingal Pal Spitting h' mem , Wifweism ln Pal: Wen 15 w t lell0W 5100 who f5urvl'5'in5 YF-9? I do He: oh, rm 4 tel-the . C Mile: Wllfduinl wi She: Well, ll Histfather: My bf Seeondfatherr T113 llillace: Did the dc Wallace: 0h.yes! i lhke and Pal rm! lalifm-1. Pan uw, lllhevefybest bnndyj mk'll1ebar-tender ww l alittle whisk- . hmdeofixim-'Q ii: look at the c .Wi MPP bar-tender lm! lm? Wvll. l ru lTm1y-Wm ddr. . , , R , 'i IO! ae isdumlsllallfnr ig, , iTalh 'nidx 4. ' ' hr, lllqgfgchokml' mii its 'bm nu. rm lliiteiml kh.,d.t'l 'l Nur fum- 5 ll!-ll. Q,

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lllhx ltr :limit ' 'illz Ilkhxshn ed 5' Sziizxq-i ilfkl while Hop! . , P0 DP. i iinrgy nights THE POTTER SHIELD Pop: Didn't you promise to be good? Sonny: Yes, sir. Pop: Do you know the difference between good and bad? Sonny: Yes, sir, except I get mixed. ' Pop: Explain how you get mixedj Sonnyr Well, you say the baby is good at crying and at the same time he is supposed to be bad. The doctor bent over the dying editor and shook his head. Poor man, circu- lation almost gone. The dying editor sat up and shouted, You're a liar 3 we have the largest circulation in the country. - I bought myself an aeroplane- I had a dream of bliss, I thought the lovely winged thing this like up right soar Would ' ,dnl him' He The minute that I started out ' The engine was the bunk- The motor balked and kicked and broke And fell to earth ker plunk. Griffin: What is a matrimonial bureau? Tommy: Oh, any bureau that has five drawers full of women's stuff and one man's shirt and a tie. Knight: Mr. Newsome is an exceptional gentleman. Lermen: How so, why exceptional? n Knight: Well, he got up and gave his seat to two ladies. 1lill - The angler lies beside the brook And casts his gaudy flies, ' And lies and lies and lies and lies And lies and lies and lies. . -ii A NEW ONE Esberg: Please, sir, my grandmother- Mr. Potter: Oh tell me a new one. Esberg: -promised to take me to the ball game if I got Off- Seventy-seven

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Rv You Illlllk her, is last nmmems? lose hc-r anm. lt up the back. mst have been an - I . WPICOIDQ hun' rust to go OW! the Ce. n puli. Sljaguswd f':1Vf' In i THE POTTER SHIELD TWW9191' V00 Waiterbr DO you serve lobsters here? Waiter: Yes, sir, we serve anyone, sit right down -Ex - Pat ilooking at Sign' twenty feet up in 94 SWUOHDZ Mike do you see that sign up there, No spitting here. Penalty 3100. Board of Health ? Mike: Sure. Pat: Well those health guys are poor sport . I'd b '11' ' fellow 3100 who could spit up there. S 8 W1 mg to give any - Mrs. A. Csurveying sleeping infantl: That must be a titled child. Mrs. B.: Yes 5 I do call him the -Prince of Wales. , He: Oh, John, I'm almost dead! I've carried this great can out fifteen times to water the roses. He: Why didn't you wait for me? u A She: Well, it looked so like rain I was afraid they'd never get done at all if I didn't do them at once. First father: My boy's letters from college always send me to the dictionary. Second father: That's nothing. My boy's always send me to the bank. f THE BEST ToN1o Willace: Did the doctor do anything to hasten your recovery? Wallace: Oh, yes! He told me he was going to charge me five dollars a visit. Mike and Pat went into a saloon to get a drink, and Mike ordered a nice big stein of beer. Pat thought for a while and then said: I'd loike to have a glass of the very best brandy ye've got in the housef' The bar-tender went off, and soon came back with a dusty old bottle. He took a little whisky glass and tenderly filled it with the brandy, and then set it alongside of Mike's beer. Pat looked from one to the other and then said: I say, Mike, just look at the difference in size, will ye? I ain't got one-tenth as much as ye. . The bar-tender looked up and said: Well, you asked for the best brandy, didn't you? Well, I want you to know that this stuff is forty years old. Forty years old! said Pat. What do you think of that, Mike? Mike thought for a minute and then said: Forty years old! Well, begorry, it's damn small for its age. ,i.ii..1-il- Father, said the small boy, what is psychology? i U 4 . Psychology, my son, is a word of .four syllables that you ring in to distract attention when the explaining gets difficult. Jessie: I was taken into dinner by that officer you introduced me to., He was quite gallant, and remarked upon my bird-like appetite- 0 , Maud: Well, he should be a good judge on that pO111'03 he runs an Qstrlch farm in South Africa. , Seventy-'nine