Piedmont High School - Tris Yearbook (Piedmont, WV)

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fel W1 Have you read the 'Wrath to Come ?' Yes, I just got a note from my wife. Eugene: Three thousand, four hundred and two elephants were need- ed last year to make billiard balls. Enid: Isn't it marvelous that such large animals can be taught to do such delicate work ? I say, old man, what's the matter? Been in a wreck ? Naw. Had a date with a doctor's wife and forgot to take along an ap- ple. Say, Bo, what kinda licker Was dat you was drinkin' last nite? Ah saw you layin' in da gutter. Dat was what dey calls chicken licker-two drinks an' you don't care Where you lays. How do you know he is in love? . What else would make a man absent minded enough to put his dirty shirt to bed and then jump down the clothes chute ? Engagements, like wine, are usually the result of much squeezing. Cheap skates never cut much ice. Sally Sullivan: Pardon me, but do you serve hard boiled eggs ? Waitress: Sure thing, old dear, as long as they behave themselves. H John Crist said that he would like to shoot the duck that Wrote What- 'll I do ? The fellow that used to cheat in solitaire is still cheating. He's black- ing the squares in the cross word puzzle that he can't fill out. Lot's wife turned to salt, but ours usually gets peppery. Wife: John, the doctor told me I must have a change of air. Radio Bug: Good, I'll see if I can get Havana to-night. Enid: I saw something last night I'll never get over. Morris: What was that ? Enid: The moon. America-The land of the bob and the home of the wave. Norman Jenkins: Give me a comb Without pyorrheaf' Clerk: Whadda you mean ? Norman: One of those Whose teeth Won't fall out. . Page one hundred one

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Fell rl a pair of lips that wouldn't fit ? Head of the House Qin angry tonesj : Who told you to put that paper on the wall ? Decorator: Your wife, sir. Pretty, isn't it ? Blinks: How would the fools get killed if they abolished all the grade crossings? J inks: Oh, they'd get in the garage, shut the doors and start the en- gine running. Eloping wife Csobbingj : 'I-Ive j -j ust had a t-t-telegram from my hus- band. Her lover fanxiouslyl : He doesn't want you to go back, does he ? N-no. All he wants to know is where I-I left left his clean pair of socks, the b-brute I Ode to my room mate: Four bits. That famous soprano you had at your dinner party last night sang like a bird. Like a bird is right! I was conscious of her bill the entire evening. Considerable excitement was caused among the guests at a wedding ceremony in a Havre church recently when the lady refused to marry the bridegroom. Such painful scenes might easily be avoided if the bridegroom arranged to keep one or two ladies in reserve. Debby: Last week he sent me a box of candy with a card reading: Sweets to the Sweet. Sarah: That was a ipretty sentiment. Debby: Yes, but this week he sent me an ivory hair brush. Horace: Is May the kind of a girl that gives you any encourage- ment ? Sally: Judge for yourself. The last time I called on her she kept wondering what it would feel like to have whiskers on her face. Sailor fwith parrotjz lCan'e talk! Lumme, lady, when'e sings 'The Village Blacksmithj the sparks fly out of 'is bloomin' tail ! Hard-hearted: I am through with all this. To-morrow we separate. Wife: Oh, Reggie, give me one more chance, and I'll promise never to put poison in your coffee again. Page one hundrzd

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fell W1 And how soon are you retired in the air service ? Generally about two years. Really? And you are retired as a colonel ? No, an angel. Old Lady: Why, I wouldn't think of renting this room. I ain't going Zo gay my good money for a box like this, and I simply won't have a folding I e . Bell Hop: Go on in, lady. This ain't your room, it's an elevator. It's all off now, sighed the sheik, as he looked in the mirror at his bald head. William, looking down the gun, Pulls the trigger-just for fun. Mother says in accents pained, William is so scatter-brainedf' John Crist says: A man's first attempt to hold a girl on his knee might be called a trial balance. Debby: Have some more pudding ? ' John: Awfully good-just a mouthful. Debby: Dora, fill up J ohn's plate. - Norman Hoffa fin restaurantj : How's the chicken to-day ? Waitress: Fine, kid, how's yourself ? Someone said Marie Walsh is so dumb that she thinks a tonsorial par- lor is a throat doctor's office. Thelma Schoppert: 'Tm going to sell kisses at the Charity bazaar. Do you think 31.00 is too high ? . Paul Thomas: Oh, no. People expect to be robbed at bazaars any- how. Harold Kight at 1 a. m.: I heard a ghost story the other night-by J ove it did make me start 1 Mary Hamilton: I wish I knew it. Mr. Rhodes: Julius Caesar didn't have a hair cut for ten years. Russell: I didn't know he was eccentric. Mr. Rhodes: He Wasn't: he was bald. Page one hundred two