Philadelphia Osteopathic Hospital School of Nursing - Cranium Yearbook (Philadelphia, PA)

Page 50 text:

IF If you can please the T. S. O. and the Doctors, The superintendent and the patients, too, The patients ' families and the senior nurses ' Twould seem that you have quite enough to do. If you can please the czarins of the pantry, The Napoleons who massage and bathe the hall, And yell at you for not walking on the ceiling, Or smile when you have lost your beau ' s phone call. If you can please the Internes and House Doctors, And hold your tongue when bunk they try to pass, Or when chambermaids and elevator workers Think your day is lost without their sass. If you can stay your tears when in the drug room They ask you when and why you want their wares, Send you back to your ward to get prescriptions, And make you climb what seems a million stairs. If you are serving two months in the OR. With tie my gown or hand me this and that, The wild excitement of the Doctors scolding. Still don ' t give up and leave your training flat. If you don ' t swear the night you ' ve got a heavy And are informed it ' s your turn to relieve, If you still stick when lying tongues run rampant, That those in charge seem disposed to believe. If you glide past them at nearly daybreak, Sign the book and make it look like ten, If you can fool the matron and the nurses When you go capless for a walk around the block. If you can keep your head when bells around you Are ringing till you don ' t know what to do. If you can keep your heart when handsome internes Are losing theirs and blaming it on you. If now that you have finished all your training You can look back upon the life as mild Yours is the earth, but I am here to tell you You ' ll not be a nurse, you ' ll be a saint my child. -Selected. THE CRANIUM, 1937 Page Forty

Page 49 text:

THE LOST WILL OOD TESTflmEflT OF THE CLASS OF 193? E, THE Class of 1937, of the Institution of Supervised Romance, County of Brotherly Love, and State of Insignificance, being of unsound mind, super -excellent efficiency, and uncomparable memory do make and pub- lish this our last testament, thereby revoking and making all former wills made by us heretofore null and void. Therefore we do give and begueath the following cherished individual pos- Long hours of classes (with subseguent Ischial irritations) to stay-behinds. Alice Powell ' s happiness to Birchall. Some of Pete ' s confidence to Yoder. The conguests of Hopfie to Wildenstein. Winning ways of Stradtman to Rapp. Ivory and ebony board of Willie ' s to Tracey (may the bumblebee fly without ceasing) . Late permits every night to Rubinkam. Lasting neatness of Miller ' s hair to Davis. Anne Mason ' s reticence to Alice Miller. Night emergencies to the operating staff. Doug ' s uniforms to Florence Green (sorry we can ' t supply a sewing machine as well) . Thelma Fyock ' s longies to the Department of Dermatology. Evelyn Kilmer ' s daydreams to Cohalan. Swartley ' s studiousness to Wescoat. The culinary arts of lones to Anderson. An unruffled spirit from Young to Clancy. Mary Kochut ' s alarm to Fidler. Energy of Jacoby to Brdwn. ' Nough of Greene ' s wit and sarcasm to last several years. The strangers of the fire escape to the occupants of second floor ' 15. Whereas: We do hereby ask that the Misses Peeler and Sterrett carry our bodies to their final resting place. Whereas: We do hereby appoint Mr. Stewart Caldwell to be executor of this our last will and testament. (Continued on page JfS) THE CRANIUM, 1937 Page Thirty-nine

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THE NURSERY NURSES ' PSALM The class is my bug bear, I shall not pass, It maketh me to study in a stuffy room. It leadeth me to troubles unseen. It dampeneth my soul. It leadeth me in the paths of doctors for education ' s sake. Yea tho I look thru the books of the medics, I will learn nothing, for I cannot study, but the pictures and sketches they fascinate me. It prepareth slight knowledge before me, in the presence of my state boards. It filleth my head with facts, but they will not stay there. Surely troubles and mistakes shall follow ms all my life and I shall dwell in the class of the dumbbells forever. M. I. G. THE CRANIUM, 1937 Page Forty-one