Pennsylvania Western University - Calnorsean Yearbook (California, Pennsylvania)

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7 Je Co ?crsecr 7 An Unprobed Leak from M. K. F. Initiation Are you dissipated, got any bad habits? Scared applicant, I some- times chew a little gum. What is the equator? An imaginary lion running around the earth. What two things did you refuse to eat for dinner? Breakfast and supper. Where is St. Paul? In heaven with St. Peter. What is a Republican? A sinner mentioned in the Bible. Wife ' s maiden name, if any? (Answer not heard.) Have you seen a fellow around here with a wooden leg named Murphy? What ' s the name of his other leg? Did you ever do any acting? Yes, was once leading man. With what company? Led dogs in Uncle Tom ' s Cabin. How do you account for your deficiency in spelling? Bad spells during infancy. When two horses finish a race neck and neck — is that a neck-tie? (Answer Muffled.) Would it be best for air planes to carry electric lights? Yes it would make it easier for the aviators to light. How would you shuffle a pack of hounds? (Gi ' oands heard.) Why do we call them angle worms? They ' re round aren ' t they? What time would you spade the ground for an auto truck garden? An- swer not caught. Sentry appeared. 141

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7 fe Ca ?crsea ? Wanted — A good yoke of oxen. Must have something dependable when one wants to go. An auto in exchange for good oxen, apply for further informa- tion to Prof. Claypoole. All are not boi ' n gie.it, Minn Charleton did not weigh over six pounds. Senior — Why are you taking Botany this spring? Fair Junior — Because the man I am. engaged to is interested in a plant of some kind and I want to be able to talk with him intelligently abcut his business. Milk isn ' t any better- or woi ' se in the dining-room since the price is up — for the farmers still keep watering the stock. You cannot retain the present — You cannot recall the past — You cannot retard the future. What is the difference between repartee and unsult? asked Prof. Fields? It depends on whether you or the other fellow makes the remark, said the noble senior. Guy Everly is carrying one study and dragging four. Miss Ward — Would you leave your home for me? Everly — Fd leave a baseball game in the ninth inning with the score a tie. I so love nature, sighed the young spring freshmen looking toward the river, It adds So much to the scenery. The crowd may not have been the largest, but it certainly was the densest, at Clarion, that has heard the inter-normal debators to date. Jim La Poe — I C3uld write this play if I had the mind. Heinle — It ' s a shame you haven ' t. Prof. Field — Well, there is one thing to be proud of: we have no class prejudices in this country. Ruth G. — H ' m, I guess you were never around when three or four sophs, got hold of a freshm.an. Heard in Chapel — Did the youth who ' bore the banner with the strange device ' really climb the mountain or was it a bluff? An answer achieved by a fresh in arithmetic — 62 and five halves. Pittsburgh Pastors preach dry sermons, saysasomewhat equivocal, headline in a Pittsburgh paper. You have to sit down on that senior occasionally. Yes — he ' s just about as hard to crush as an accordion. When the Star Spangled Banner is played, everyone stands. The Wacht am Rein is not heard, because nobody would stand for that. Hen Wilkins is so thin he could bathe in a fountain pen. 140

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7 e Ca ?crse(7 ? First x id x ssociation Hick ' s Red Cross Unit, S. W. S. N. S. The following students have received help during 1916-17. John Filby Headache. Got a prescription for an aching void. Raymond Filby overcome with a sense of his own importance. Letrick injured by colhsion with an intoxicated sidewalk. Werner overbalanced by a barber carelessly parting his hair too far on one side. Mary Dickey struck with an idea. Freda Hill seized with a fit of giddiness. Minn Charleton injured by a falling shadow. Fred Gillogly struck for excess laundry bill, by Registrar. Zana Smith seized with lockjaw while orating on ' ' Conservation and correlation of mental forces. Horner compound fracture of heart due to falling in love and out. Howard Sparks pocket book fractured by poker. Herrington seized with a fit in Sam Winer ' s Clothing Store. Irene Van Sickle paralyzed with fear of failure in State Board Exams. Marie Coleman crazed with joy at receiving an invitation to a dance. Son Mills struck dumb in class. Bertha Long overcome with emotion. -Jane Wells broke her collar-bane in the library trying to pronounce Przemysl. Thomas McAllister spell bound. Ch . ' -ch heart failure from excitement over a game of checkers. Hiinght tongue tied in presence of Miss Shaw. Hank had to have shock absorber used when elected contest debator. Wilkins is looking better, but he doesn ' t look good, yet. Everly cracked, because he went broke. Marg. Connelly was exposed to Physiology in Prof. Wright ' s class — but it didn ' t take. 142