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Page 53 text:
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A E The Last Words of cz Slzeptie PREFACE My physician tells me my days are numbered. But Iam not afraid. No, I am happy! Perhaps in the Great Beyond I shall find what I have failed to find on earth. All my life I have worshipped Success, thinking to find Happiness her Companion. Blind, stumbling cynic that I was! All who have read my essays, reports, and books have pronounced me great. They are wrong. My work brings no joy into the heart or home. Rather it appeals to the scientific world which is, after all, a cold and un- sympathetic one. Mark ye, then. Seek not Success to find Happiness, for Success's Hall is empty. Hark ye, while a disappointed old man relates to you the story of the Ulncomparable Fifty , who by their unselfish labor brought warmth to the heart, merriment to the eyes, and peace to the World. R. V. Courtland Professor of Archaeology, University of Pennsylvania. - - - -9 911111 4 I 'K f f ---,..-,! U U ,V :J f dl I rv, V 0 11, , 9- Af, 23' 'fl 'fa ff 1 af ff: XO. I -1 ' kigaivlx , ,fE'fbjo'!,lgE5l.gf new xx Page 49
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Page 54 text:
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t V gf n KZ--- 'rFlS-'--ji Q5 c:N?3jx 6, ' -4 1? M S O N ,iGf'va'fffiQ'2,fd'ff315il,42 7 :L p fl ill he Last ords of I N Page 50 cz Skeptic 'KW elf p 1 9 EJ O ' CHAPTER I. The many people who ride in their aeroplanes daily or take week-end trips from continent to continent seldom think about their forefathers who lived in the years of 1900 to 1950. Indeed, few are even interested. But it is to a small group of these early people that we owe our progress. During the years from 1997 to 1999 much was done to discover the wonders of the early part of the twentieth century. Eliminating all the lesser genuises, we find that to a class of fifty persons, belongs the great honor of establishing the basis upon which our modern civilization is founded. When the coffins of these fifty people were unearthed, it was discovered that on the black cover of each was engraved the numbers 1-9-2-0. This puzzled the archae- ologists and even the most learned men were mystified. Then a young genius sug- gested that all the prisons be investigated, thinking that some of the cells might be numbered 1-9-2-0. Countless theories were advanced concerning the explanation of 1-9-2-0, each in its turn proving fallacious. At last some man whose name is unknown to history stated that 1-9-2-0 meant the year in which these fifty people were graduated from high school. His statement was ridiculed far and wide. Many satirical essays were written about this theoryg newspapers commented freely on it. This absurd statement furnished interesting material for the humorists of the age. Everyone laugh- ed, jeered, and mocked. But the learned men did not laugh, and after many heated debates and an inestimable amount of research work, this famous theory was authenti- cated. Great was the amazement of the general public. Indeed, it is very extraordinary that all these fifty celebrities to whom we owe our undying gratitude should have been graduated in the same class. l I I n u I ff,'--it Q ' fd. 1 as 2 -s L, :P QQ. I N ! 3
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