Ohio College of Dental Surgery - Alethian Yearbook (Cincinnati, OH)

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pants. has been much discussion whether pants are plural or sine gular. PANTS t ANTS are made for men, and not for women. Women are made for men, and not for pants. When a man pants for a woman, and a woman pants for a man, they are. a pair of pants Such pants clonit last! Pants are like mo- lasseSethey arc thinner in hot weather and thicker in cold. Men are often mistaken in Such mistakes are breeches of promise. There Seems to us that When men wear pants it is plural, and, when they don't wear any pants at all, it is singular. Men go on a tear in their pants, and it is all right; When the pants go on a tear it is all wrong. If you want to make pants last, make the coat first. A fat man can not keep up his pants in summer without suspenders, but a dog can. llVVllyldoes a dOg wear It is evident This naturally suggests the query: more clothes in summer than in winter? that in winter he wears a coat, while in the summer he wears a coat, and PANTS! Where Were You WHEN Bradley aqked the origin of catgnt? Rinehart assisted in the operation. Hill was not one of the pikers? Kelleher started to sing? Lindcman led the wooing? Elias wasxft officious? Another man took Smiley's girl to the dance? Crawford wasnite important? Kelley was calleiflidown by Dr. H. A.? Greenburg pracfhhed ventriloquism? Degnon asked ahout Tennesseels temperance license? Thomas was bested by Miss Stock? Siegfried had the mumps? Kraatz passed the West Virginia State Board? Bradley dehned Pewee of the Antrum ? Mitchell said Hall he needed now was treatmentsii? Doctor Way failed to see you? Buckingham took a car in from Madville? Timmerman said held take Indiana State Board? Gories and Schwartz bought the Standard? Mondon spoke English in class? Hale: log, played the baby act? lioltz was chief of police at Newport? Burdettc and Compton lost their clothing? Dalton was looking out Mondon's window? Beaver proposed to the secretaryewhich one? Eaton went to housekeeping? Goshom had the'wrong girl? Kearns met the blonrle at the Emery? Lent got back what he lllent you? Marshall and Malouey grew to life-size? Edwards resigned from the picture committee? Greenfield quit his flashy dressing? Hall and Hall established their relationship? Krucker won the basket ball game? Ramsey decorated the mansion? Wood and Wright annexed the title of 'lRutlians'i? Thompson used Antihhlogistine? Smith made the ltechnicM bridge? Rothenbush got a vacation? Gott went to Blanehester? Nobody got sore, and everybody was pleased with The Aletlm'cm knocks.

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ABSOLUTELY TRUE, DOGt ON. IT! Being a short story of Army Life. ERACITYh is a rather fancy name for a dog, but, when the. particular dOg is a large brute, redeheaded and dreamyeeyed, it does not seem so extraordinary. tW'eracity't was the mascot of Company M, Twenty-eighth United States Infantry, Which, in 1900, was stationed at Fort Vancouver, Wash. When the com- pany went to tFrisco, the dog went along, and also embarked on the United States transport nGrantit with the rest of the soldiers. In due time the boat pulled out for Manila, and, during the first twentyiour hours, the rails were Very much in demand. ttVeraeity was as seasick as the rest, and it was a pitiful sight to see him chase up and down the decks, howling mournfully for some one to show him the way home. During his blind and sickly rambling he ran into the pointed end of the anchor, and had his one eye com- pletely torn out. He was taken to the hospital, where the vacant space was filled with cotton and the lids sewed Up. making a rather comical, hut sad, sight. With the-Ioss of the eye dVeraeity seemed to lose the friendship of most of the boys, and soon became a mark at which hardtack was hurled but no one had the heart to kill him. Upon arrival in the Philippine Islands hequickly made himself disliked by the Filipinos on account of his ehieken-steaiing ability, and caused such an uproar among the clear brown brothers that the captain ordered him locked up, After a weelds rest the company left on an eight-day trip to the mountains, taking the dog along. On the third day a ravine of a thousand feet in depth had to be crossed. This was about ten feet wide, and was spanned by a single log. The diabolical plan of getting rid of the dog started somewhere, and the men lined up on both sides of the ra- vine while ttVeraeity', was enticed across. Just as he was on the middle of the 10g he was knocked off, and started on his rapid decline with sickening wails. For fifteen Wit minutes we watched him shoot downward, his yells being no longer audible, when, with a noise like a cannon, he struck the rushing water a, thousand feet below. That deg must have struck the water at a mile-a-miuute gaitL for the water splashed up and nearly drowned a halfmdozen fellows above. With a last look at iTeracityis watery grave the company moved on, and in five days arrived again at their quarters. As they were all seated ion the groundt at their noon meal some one let out a frightened yell, bringing the com- pany to their feet, expecting the enemy, but, instead, there was Veracitytt back in our midst, as big as life! It may sound strange, but stranger still was the fact that during his five dayst looking for the company the dog had com- pletely regained his lost eye, and was as handsome as ever. The cotton had disappeared, and any member of the com- pany stands ready to corroborate this story. Yes, gentle reader, you may shake your head and say ttIncredu- lous Y, but- L. C. GREENBURG, i07. egg-h

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As We Know Them Kid Kelly. tiHankh Greenburg. itCatgut Bradley. Bill Goshorn. ttIke Rothenbush. uLou MK, Gott. HLiz Stock. DOC Bixby. ttRach Canon. Dukeit Lindeman. HH. 0. G? Smith, itSIeepy Eaton. uP. 1. G? Smith. ttAeonite Mondon. iiBuCk Buckingham, Foetusti Maloney. ttProf? Mitchell. ttGraft Thomas. ttRuntii Degnon. tiFuzzyi' Ramsey. Wahoo Crawford HTexasi' Thompson, hSister PurseiL HPill,' Hill. i'COp', Monahan, uMumps:n Siegfried, 'Whiteyii Kraatz. ttEasy Smiley. Virgin'i Compton. wealdyh Elias. Things That Can What became of Rinehartis money at Latonia races? Did he win? ? ? ? Why Dr, Smith said: 'iWe, as dentists, prefer the chair to the bed, explaining the use of the word Hclinical? Where the Duke got all the money to buy candy for the girls, take the boys to Peoples, and live luxuriously! What made Pursell remark at the Bank Cafe hre: Now, if the New Richmond fire department was here, the fire would be out long ago ! How Bradley cut his mouth? Some one said they heard him remark Hheid fergot heid jes, sharpened his knife when he went ter lick tlf terbaccy Off the blade? Where Gutzeit got onto an narsenic filling Y' Why Shelt became insulted when Greenburg com- mented on his technic, 'tlooks like it was made seven years ago. 91 Not Be Explained What makes Smiley look so downhearted? It is whis- pered that it is love failure! Who wrote the two-act comedy in which Barton, M057 baugh and Degnon starred! It was called iiScratch iEm; Catch iEm l , Did anybody have their band for their bandless Rich- mond completed before Lindeman? How Greenburg felt when the Duke butted-in On his lady friend, causing the hrst-mcntioned party to buy for the crowd ! Why Sheets always walks slowly, and rubbers into the window at the corner of Court and Plum. Who the ladies are that Siegfried manages to meet ac- cidentally in about the same place each evening. Why Krucker made that horrible blunder in the Physie ology Quiz.