Ohio College of Dental Surgery - Alethian Yearbook (Cincinnati, OH)

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OUR CONTEMPORARIES. HOW HE YVON HER. Ice Cream he bought his darling, And she ate and ate and ate 5 Till at last her heart she gave him, To make room for one more plate. -Harvard Lampoou. 18 'TVVOULD BE MORE UNEASY VVITHOUT IT Uneasy lies the tooth that wears a crown. -Cornell Wfidow. Q' THE VVAY OF THE TRANSGRESSOR. The way of the transgressor is hard-but not always on the transgressor. -Princeton Tiger. nf 'TWOULD TAKE A BETTER ONE. L' I'll beat your face? A Yer cantt do it wid yours. -Harvard Lampoon, 16' A STRONG CASE. g Possession, backed by a strong arm and a hefty boot, is usually ten points better than the law. -Pennsylvania Punch Bowl. ve' LITTLE GEORGE. Little George, precocious bunch, Took his skates right after lunch, Started out, the ice to try- IVhich he did-but here we sigh. As he cut a figure eight, Ice refused to bear his weight g Now he dwells where skates will melt, Telling dead ones how it felt. -Pennsylvania Punch Bowl. 130 IN ITHACA A miss is as good as a mile-for really it's only a dif- ference in the number of laps, anyway. -Cornell W'idow. iS THE DANGER OF BEING POLITE. She : Your step suits mine beautifully. He : How lucky 1 Especially as I dance so badly? -Harvard Lampoon. Q' CONTINUED IN OUR NEXT. Y Dinwit: 't Say, our backbones are like serial stories, aren't they ? Prove it Dinwit : 'L Continued in our necks -Harvard Lampoon. ve! NOTHING IN IT. . Shall I brain him ? cried a hazer g and the victimls courage fell. You can't, it is a freshman. just hit him on the head. -Sphinx. Q9 SONG OF THE AUTOMOBILIST. My cup is overflowing, I've joy in life's brief span 5 At last I have run 'over A mounted policeman. -Punch Bowl. vb' ON THE NILE. The monkey lost his hold and fell into the crocodile's waiting jaws. Even then his wits did not desert him. I just dropped in for dinner, he said, with an en- gaging smlle. -Yale Record.

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PERVERTED PRGVERBS A rolling stone gathers no moss, 'tis true, but it stops when it Ends a hole it can fill. .0 The man who said: H Twinkle, twinkle, little star, had the satisfaction of seeing them twinkle. So also had the man who said: Roll on thou dark blue ocean, roll I But how very disappointed must he have been who said: Backward! Turn backward, oh Time, in your flight. ' 0 Music may be the universal language, but it will always be Greek to some people. .0 Never forget that the under dog sometimes has the best hold. 0 A womanls worst fault is her inclination to believe everything men tell her. .0 Itls a short lane that does not turn once too often. .0 There are plenty of people you can improve your mind a lot by not associating with. 0 A man can always get a woman to have him by acting like he thought she wouldn't. .0 Some come to college to gain wisdom, while others come to lose their wisdomtteethj. I29 If some men were to lose their reputation they would be lucky. .2 To name a cigar after an actress doesn't make it draw any better. 0 Men set up the drinks, and the drinks upset the men. 2 A minister practices' what he preaches when he re- hearses his sermons. 0 The fellow who wears squeaking shoes has no music in his sole. .0 Some men resemble the bottom number of fractions- the bigger they appear the less they really are. 0 Wheii a wise man makes a mistake it teaches him something. ' .0 . Knocking a chip off the other fellow's shoulder does not necessarily mean that the knocker wants to fight. It may mean that he lacks ordinary discretion.

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PICTURES. WORD Three smart young men and three nice girls, All lovers true as steel g Decided in a friendly way To spend the day awheel. They started in the early morn, And nothing seemed aniiss 5 And when they reached the leafy lanes They in like rode twos this. They wandered by the verdant dale, Beside the rippling rill 5 The sun shone brightly all the while, They heard the song-birdls trill. They sped through many a woodland glade, The world was full of bliss g And when they rested in the shade They sat in twos like this. The sun went down and evening canie, A lot too soon, they saidg Too long they tarried on the way, The clouds grew black oterhead. ' Down dashed the rain I They hoineward flew 'Till one unlucky miss Slipped sideways-Crash ! Great Scott ! The lot Wereallniixednplikethis. 131 A PULL. I. Before I married Mary Ann, The corset was a mystery, But now each day she turns to me, And I behold, oh, hully gee ! That something surely is amiss, D Because the strings look just like this. II. Catch hold, she tells nieg I obey 5 I grasp the laces in each hand. Now pull, she says, with all yo And I begin that strenuous light, 'Till she rewards me with a kiss. as Us OJ, Q Q, 66 8 6 df, 6 .vt O .49 4 Q Z' We it ur might,