Oakhurst Collegiate School - Acorn Yearbook (Cincinnati, OH)

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THE ACORN 25 As a rule the plainer a theorem in Geometry is to a woman, the plainer the woman nWhy did Papa have appendicitis and have to pay the doctor a thousand dollars, Mamma ? KI11; was God's will, clear? IIAnd was it because God was mad at Papa or pleased with the doctor? HWhatts the diEerence between vision and sight? IIWell, see those two girls across the street? HYes. The pretty one I should call a vision of loveliness; but the other onew she's a sightW A SAD SEAL TALE. A mermaid sat beside the sea; Early she wept and late. IIAh! me! she sighed, Hard as IIve tried I caxft be up to date; For though I smoke and though I fiirt I can not wear a harem skirt. Maybe one has to dig for money because it's the root of all evil. uThe Christmas belles are peeling, remarked little johnny, as he heard a shoe drop in the guest room when sister's Christmas visitors were getting ready for bed, THE PARTIAL PIG. A Pig who to Hamlet was taken, Formed a theory that could not be shaken. nIn Hamlet? said he, IIA cipher we see That proves it was written by Bacon? ONE FAULT. FARMER BURR -- How do you like your new automobile, Ezra? FARMER ROOTrFWal, I canIt go to sleep on my way home from town, and wake up in the barnyard, like I could with old Dobbin m- Puck. A CHANGED MAN, IIAre you the same man who ate my mince pie last week? nN0, mum. I'll never be thI same man againww New York Mail.

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24 THE ACORN REALLY, ALL THE SAME. As the railroad train was stopping, an old lady, not accustomed to traveling, hailed the passing conductor and asked: Conductor, what door shall I get out by ?it uEither door, Maiamj' graciously answered the conductor. T he car stops at both ends. WHY HE WOULD LIKE IT. The little son of the minister, at Sunday dinner, said at the family table: Father, I wish I could be ta doorkeeper in the House of the Lord: as you said this morningfl Indeed? said the minister-father, with a pleased look across the table at his wife. ttYesfi said the boy, nfor then I wouldnt have to listen to the sermon.U COULDN'T FOLLOW HIM. John? said farmer Foddershucks to his college-bred son, who was home on a vacation, hev ye noticed Si Mulletts oldest gal lately? Strikes me she's gettin, ter be a right likely critter, hey ?i, ttSheis as beautiful as Hebe, agreed John enthusiastically. t'Aw, shueksW grunted Farmer F. uSheis a blame sight purtierh he be. Why he ain't no beauty. She gits it frjm her motheris folks? USING H15 FRIENDS. A visitor from New York to the suburbs said to his host during the afternoon: By the way, your front gate needs repairing. It was all I could do to get it open. You ought to have it trimmed or greased or something. ttOh, no? replied the owner. KiOh, no, thafs all right.n uWhy is it all right ?'i asked the visitor. ttBecauseIi was the reply, every one who comes through that gate pumps two buckets of water into the tank on the roof. MOTHER tto hve-year-old Johnyejohn, everything I tell you goes right in one ear and out the other. IOHN e Maybe thatis why I have two. When a lawyer talks freely some one has to pay for it.

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FRANKLIN SCHOOL May and Oak Streets 5! x. F f V? Cincinnati .RANKLIN has prepared for Harvard, Yale, Princeton and other colleges, more than 300 boys. Graduates of the School are admitted on certificate to Cornell, Michigan, Williams, Dartmouth, University of Cincinnati, and other colleges that permit admission by certiftcate J J J J- o'- If You Want the Best and Cheapest for Your Table :00 TO: KAHNS Forest and Reading Humboldt and Woodburn Aves. AVONDALE. WALNUT HILLS Garments Returned on Time Absolutely Clean NORTH 32 The French Benzol Dry Cleaning Co. 2243 GILBERT AVENUE. WALNUT HILLS Kindly manlfon THE ACORN when nllronizlng our advurtlurs.