Northwestern University Naval ROTC - Purple Salvo Yearbook (Evanston, IL)

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lnfroa'ucl71g! 3.14. Wolf A On the opposite page you see pictured a char- acter the like of which is seldom seen. He is what might. be described as aconvenienteombina- tion of wolf , man and goldbrick. This beast is best known as B. A. Wolf. His virtues are all of a negative value. He doesn't kill old ladies and he never spills his beer. But that is all he never does. In appearance he is a complete mess. Notice, if you will, his stance. lt is l1is favorite position. B. A. Wolf is usually garbed in a sharp-looking blue serge suit, bagged at the knees, shiney at the elbows, frayed at the cuffs, and liberally smeared with a choice assortment of chow, buttons, lint, and anchors of varying sizes. The whole outfit is topped off with a natty, il' some- what battered looking hat- that likewise carries out the chow and anchor motif. Hang an A.mer- ican Theater ribbon and a Victory Medal on him, and there you have Mr. B. A. Wolf. He is a creature of habit and ve1'y infrequently departs from l1is schedule of activities. The ever-present cigarette as well as the of ten-present beer provides another distinctive mark by which he may be identified. His natural aversion for work in any form makes B. A. Wolf a setup for the hibernation idea. In fact when ever the B. A. Wolf hunters tthey are people with gold stripes on their sleevesj are not around, you can usually find B. A. Wolf in his lair tThat's French for sack.J hihernating like hell. Possibly the only other force that can make him get out of bed is his vast hunger. It is this that causes him three times a day to reel out in an effort- to find food. Usually he contents himself with a meal that smells, rather than tastes, good. The previously mentioned B. A. Wolf hunters make it difficult for our hero to give natural ex- pression to his heredity good spirits. Whenever he can escape their vigilance, he is in good spirits, or at least in a place where spirits, good or bad, can be obtained for a small sum. But when the hunters hove into view, B. A. VVolf sucks in his smile, closes his big mouth, and in general tries his best to look like an exceptionally timid lamb. This action tlatters the hunters and they usually puff out their chests, then strut away without harming the charming cheat. From Saturday noon till Sunday 1900, our friend is more closely akin to a wolf than at any otzher time of the week. Howling away the night, he invariably seeks one of two, often both, things! You guessed it! He looks for wine and women, beer and babes, gin and gals, scotch and skirts, or some suitable substitute thereof. Girls, the biggest item in B. A. Wolf's cat- alogue of likes, are likely to find him a man of many moods. Depending upon t.he type of girl, B. A. Wolf may present a character varying from the Van Johnson to the Humphry Bogart. But whatever the style, the goal is always the same! B. A. Wolf's mental prowess is somewhat one- sided. The acme of perfection to him is any grade over 2.49. In his early youth eagerness was his watch word, but as he grew older he realized the folly of his ways and became what he is today, a thinking machine that never gets out of neutral gear. The only way in which he really shines is in the fine art of- thinking up new methods of avoiding work. I-Ie possesses as airy a disregard for the word rank as any six flyers in the Air Force of the United States. Once in a great while he will strain his moral code by permitting himself to salute one of his superiors. Usually, however, this happens only when that superior has enough braid to supply a dentist with enough gold to till all the holes he could drill in a year. B. A. Wolf is no athlete. Most of his exercise comes in lifting heavy fiaggons of beer from the bar to his mouth. Infrequently he will wander over to the gym for a session with the boxing gloves. This is his favorite sport because he gets a chance to use the two horse shoes that the Lone Ranger gave to him. Now and again our indolent friend gets the urge to put on the dog. He finds a rich sailor Cany storekeeperb and borrows a few thousand from him. Then with money in hand, girl on arm, bottle on hip, and teensoredj on mind, he offs to one of the local nightclubs where he takes great delight in rubbing elbows with colonels, majors and captains and beating said e's, m's, and 4-'s out of all the best seats in the house. J

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THE PURPZE 5341 V0 February, 1946 B P R XX 1 9 C C O F 'I' H E M4Wll RE.S'fRVf 0fl-'lL'ER.S' TRAININ6 C'0RP5

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v4dl77l7'df Klhg inspects N. 0. .falls