Northwestern College of Law - Norwester Yearbook (Portland, OR)

Page 67 text:

interest on the fifth and sixth fl naw a?W W f N aw we arrive at the a ge of mm, X -rmrg Where theirouter garmevzti' were .ruin ofzfin, 14 Q51 1327 P:+f:3'j,l 1g.Q' Ana' wrong: were redresxed by fre and Jteel, 4- . , Q9 YOU! I H And jzutice wax known ay trial by ordeal. WG SQ :Yi UHL, the feudal lord, sat at tJ3f?!'t?5.w,f ci. L, P -- f 1,9 I :Agi a-1' l the round table surrounded l t by his barren nights, Stan- gel, Hurlburt and Plep. Lord Parker l appeared before the court and after c X14 g B 031, breaking two can openers and a ,L 7 25,-f l-ls' i cold chisel in an effort to get his Q22 if ,123 W v visor open, informed the knights of vii , the round table that one Bloom was G26 'l l -1241-iff 9'W'fif1'i' l l in possession of his client, Wink- 1 In r ..:1, h .am 71.1 gil 1-,gfg . ia ,,,'l 1-MP? L 2,-ua M1 91 F4 will if E5 1 1 - 'L kewl 61055535 NJgs I :-:ji l ler's, house. Winkler, upon hearing a n CQ his name mentioned, dropped his 4' rf? V5 Hs. A' putter and craned a high ear in or- . 64:1-...bf ri. -- - - '74 za ff Qvvrri'-f. -f 1 . fluff-ffii der to understand the cause and ef- wsfgsimgf. evra fect of the argument. Parker went 'f7' gQ, E fi x -11' l on to explain that Bloom was cre- I X V ' A , UV . I ' l 5 B e 1 if E ating waste by refusing to pay the mortgage, reasonable street assessments, and that he was also mining iron for clothing, which act did not constitute an estover. Council for the plaintiff moved the court to order the defendant to walk on hot rocks. The defense council was composed of Scott and Plep, who immediately set up the plea of justification, realizing that at one time or another they had heard of such a term in law college, but nevertheless they employed a shrewd lawyer and orator to advise them in the premises. This great attorney was none other than the renowned Irish statesman, Sir Earnest Jacketta. He arrived on the scene with his authority which was in the form of titles to cases. During the taking of the testimony and the presentation of the evi- dence, Lord Hurlburt exercised many facial gymnastics and the Lords at the round table, surmising that he knew something of the particular case and the law as it should be applied, assigned the case to him for a decision. Hurlburt decided the case and in giving his verdict he supplied the cus- tomary calisthenics of his physiognomy and tetanus set in. The court took judicial notice of the fact that the defendant's feet were tender and ordered that the defendant carry a hot rock 200 feet and if it could be done without an expression of pain the court would hold that mining iron for a panoply would be considered an estover. Bloom, being a highpowered collector, was greatly annoyed at the decision, for his feet were tough and no fire could injure them, consequently he announced his intention of appealing in open court. Fifly-0111

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Down the long corridor, preceded by the Praetorian Guard, moved the royal procession. First, numerous law clerks, carrying parchment rolls containing authority, then the centumvir Schnitzer, beautifully draped on a mortician's slab which was pushed down the aisle. The band burst into Chopin's funeral dirge and Schnitzer came to and began talking and argu- ing. In his own astute way Schnitzer picked the indictment to parts and reduced the charge from petit larceny to mayhem. In his powerful argu- ment to the court Schnitzer showed the value of allowing a chariot to be driven on the wrong side of the street and informed the court that it was a common occurrence on the Appian Way of which the Romans thought nothing. The court and spectators having grown tired and sleepy and real- izing that the asps had not been fed and watered adjourned court and recommended the offender's chariot be confiscated. Schnitzer retreated to a short order house and in his chagrin bit viciously at a ham sandwich. Iiifly

Page 68 text:

ffl 1 I AINT ff V NEVER DONE Q ' 'x 'Eta Nomura' TO ,,. Noeoov 7 ,V . 5 -if if 1 ,x , .L A , ff? , , f w A-QL ,gifs .Ea v ,Q ' 1 Q Q LIAZERTQH ft - 1 A 4,g?4s4 fi .3552 E 'JJ' Q f ' Kgs L fiilN X 5 'i N Sita? A . N-:K gl. In .9 , 1 . 1 nazi 7 . ,m ix g Q fs ffl-E? tll g lillyf yx X! , fi 25.2 SQ! ' ' , I:-:Arita mu ' , U, .5541 , 37.-.ff- , ' . Admin al' wait- X l X, K .. - r A Y jf! , American jurtrpruderzcc we Jpmk of ltzitj Famzded an precedetzt, from the ltzuu of the pmt. Baird on righti and the retlren' of 1Uf07Zg.l', fztrtice tempered with mercy the criminal longf AJ the fine for hzwzicirfe j.l fi'Zl6 tlollam' pair! Of' he prover he'.r ilzmne and jluticc if .rttzyed Am! then with the .rfznze facts he pravcf hir .round mimi The .rttztc of coztrye his homli' zmhitzzl CNo 1u0ntZerRipley'.r Pl'0772f7l67ll'.D HE coroner's office in a large middle western American city. Closed season had, by act of the city council, been abated and now the rattle of machine guns was clearly audible over the rumble of beer barons trucks. Gangland was renewing its target practice after a brief holiday, in preparation for the customary eventide sport. The coronerfs office in the morgue was a rather dead place at the time, for the season did not officially open until six o'clock, when, at the great stadium the mayor threw and the governor caught 'the opening pineapple, which was later autographed and presented to some rival gangster. Spasmodically the phone rang and Yunkers, the coroner, hissed a hoarse answer through his heavy mustache. Yunkers informed his deputy that it was Cover, the district attorney, and someone had expired at a cer- tain place, with the instruction that the deputy should run over and take charge. Yunkers then resumed his sleep. The deputy arrived at the scene rather tired himself and was led to the scene of the crime. The body was laying in an unusual position, nine bullet wounds therein, a short dirk stuck in the torso, and the arms bound tightly to the victim, a gruesome spectacle fGood night little children of radiolandj. The deputy pronounced the cause as pneumonia and announced that no inquiry would be held. Fifly-Iwo