North Toronto Collegiate Institute - Howler Yearbook (Toronto, Ontario Canada)

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ll THE HOlVLER,1934 3H Mr. Forsythe Cafter doing an experimentl : Lights, please. Silence - zip - crash - tinkle. Kingsmill: Here you are, sir. Pk Pk Ik Pk Norah McCherry: Ain't Coutts 'grand'? Edith Johnston: Your French is all right but your eyesight is bad. at fr 4: af Pcrsoualtier If there is any Rumbling in the form we know who to blame. ar :of wr x Ken Coutts almost lost all his hair when we began to take up the extraction of roots in Algebra. ff af af :af You got to be Sharp to know the work. :of wk :sf ak The correct name for Hill should be Mound, for he is only 5 ft, 6 in. tall. as :k :lf Pk Mr. Frank Csubstituting for Miss Keageyl : VVho's Soper? Rousell fspeaking for classl : XVe all are! sf af af x Soper: Miss Sharp, please stop talking. Your badness reflects upon yourself. Miss Sharp: Then you had better never look in a mirror. af ar wk ar Mr. Reynolds fAlgebraj: Coutts, there are some little pieces of paper near your seat. Coutts: Yeh! I know! Denison just dreamt that he was married so I tried to oblige. an x sf :ic Miss Allen: Is Davis here ? Yes, Miss Allen. A few seconds elapse- then, Er-uh-er-yes, Miss Allen. Miss Allen: Russell is here but I have my doubts about Jack. lk lk Ik lk One scholar: Who broke that window F Another scholar: The slug-machine at the Roehampton Pharmacy. Page .Yirzcly-Sewell 3K Scene-On board the good ship Hearts of Oak, carrying a load of Canadian trees, bound for England. First Mate: Some storm, eh Cap ? Silence. First Mate: Some stomi, eh Cap ? Silence. First Mate: Some storm, eh Cap ? Captain: Say listen, that's fret' times you've said that. First Mate: I know, but I just wanted to ask what chance we have. Captain: Oh, we maple through. First Mate: Oh, how I pint' to be with my little ones. Captain: XYell spruce up, me lad. First Mate: Say Cap, I would like to ash you a question. Captain: Oak, go ahead. First Mate: VVhat's that I radar in the water? Captain: That's the 3-mile float. First Mate: Oh buoy, we haven't fir to go. At this time in punishing story the Second Mate appears, all aflutter and bursting with excitement. Second Mate: Captain, we've sprung a leak. Captain: Get back and fix it, that's the most poplar remedy. Second Mate: We can't sir, we're half sub- merged. Captain: Have Ht'III lark our papers in the safe and prepare to drown. Second Mate disappears down the hatchway. Captain: Walnut, what's it going to be ? First Mate: VVhat do you mean, sink or swim F Captain: Naw! It's going to be fliers, mit. Second Mate freappearing from the under- wear-pardon me, I mean hatchwayj: The white mice are under the trees and everyone has started to balsa. Captain: The mice wood be, fir heaven's sake. First Mate: Alas, my friend. Captain: You'1l ask me what F First Mate: Alaska to lash me to the elm.

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Ijufff IYIIIICI-Y-.Sil.l' :if Pk Pk wr Seekloff: XVhen is a chair like a lady's dress? Morton: Xl'hen it is sat-in. as PF :ze Pk vv Smith: XYhen is a man not a man. Magee: XVhen he is a shaver. 1: br Pk Pk 3F .1 Day in SF I0 illuxic Rising-Lazy liones. H56 2i.1ll.+l'VC gotta pass your house. Auditoriumslaearn to croon. 1'hysicsflJon't do anything l wouldn't do. French-Don't blame me. Algebraflle minus you. lfnglish-Thank heaven for you. I-atineIsn't it heavenly. Lunch-Gotta go. P.T.-I'll neve' be the same. History-Down the old ox road. Detentionelt isn't fair. Homework-Morning, noon and night. PK Pk 'Y IU- Col. lYood: A'Haven't you a tire extinguisher for this portable ? Mr. Gerrow: Nou Col. Hood: XVell, I guess they won't burn up if the place does catch on tire. Mr. Gerrow: Oh, they'll burn all right: they're not green. Line Qin classh : I have a new little brother at home. Is it true that he came from heaven E Teacher: Of course! Line: VVhat a fool to come from heaven to our house. wk Pk ai: :if Fetherstone: I started out after I grad- uated from high school on the theory that the world had an opening for nie. Teacher: And you found it? ' Fetherstone: NVell rather! I'n1 in a hole now. Pk vp ,if PF Scene I.-Juliet comes out on the balcony and whispers iiRO11lCOyl. Then silence. Romeo comes into view, chanting I'm coming, I'm coming, but my head is bended low: I hear your gentle voice calling Rome-e-e-0-0-O. THE HOIVLER, '1954 Scene ll.-Romeo and Juliet are sitting spooning when a knock is heard. Romeo hollers: VVho's there ? Answer: The Merchant of Venice. Romeo: That's fine, bring me some Hamlet and eggs. t Merchant: As you like it. How about a little VVelsh Rarebit, Romeo? Romeo: Oh, no, that would give me A Midsummer Night's Dreamf' :if wk :sf wk 3G Meen: Any motorist who rounds a sharp bend in the road with too much enthusiasm is liable to take a turn for the worse. 4: x Pk X Little green parrot In a cage In a rage. My word, XVhat we heard: Naughty bird! PK x bk ak Mally Brown says that going to extremes is having chilblains and a cold in the head at the same time. 7' 4 J' , .-:'- , ,LX ' :nu ff I y NW Wm, 'l.,,,,. : rp ffm, F4315 ivQl1g fllil-Q 'Lf lib' .ei2.:2iii1:i.f:i .-:Xt ju I K ? 4' v s. f .-.sriifgglff XT f f ' -J V ' Q i V i i ,l --,i--l- 'THE lZU68y aqfvce was 4 HUGE sucess.

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Page Ninety-Eiglzl 3L Tobias asked his grandmother to Reade him a story if he, in return, would XYheeler down to the store in her wheel-chair. She answered, I VVilson. It was a topsy Turvey story and How! She read: At the break of Don the Cock began to crow. Over Thayer a Weaver was seen with a Gray shawl around her shoulders. A very Rothschild named Tucker came along with a Newman-who was a Morter. They talked to the old lady and planned ill against MacInnes, lVittmann and Jones Co. -lust at this point of the story the clock struck four, and his grandmother said, No Morrison to- day. XVhen he would Nott behave she kept -lohn at him and told him to act like a XVar- burton, and then to-morrow she would Finish the story and tell him another about Poppleton, Hodgson and Kennedy. ai: :if :if wk Favourite S!Ij'I'IljlS of Our Teaclzcrs Mr. Gerrow: Incid3ntally . . . Thanks. Mr. Lewis: Gentlemen, please! Miss Tilston: You may go.', Miss Mahoney: XYould someone please open one of those windows ? Mr. Teeter: You can't find anything until you know what you are looking for. Miss Fenwick: Come on, you old ladies. Miss Allen: When I was travelling in France. x :if wk wk IVe IVOna'cr VVho wins the arguments, Grace Nott or Mr. Lewis. Why Tony Hargreaves always goes to Muriel Gray for back notes. If Harding likes writing poetry: He looks the type. If Genevieve really has a New-man. Does Gwen really crow like a Cock? 1: wk sf at 2A Mrs. Robbin: Jim, how is it that you have lower marks in january than in December? Jim: Oh, everything is marked down after Christmas. Om' Cafe' First Pupil: I just had ox-tail soup for dinner and I feel bully. THE HOIVLER, 1934 Second Pupil: That's nothing, I had hash and I feel like everything. wk ar 11: ar 2B Mr. Farmer: VVhat is a worm ? Cam. Grant: A caterpillar that belongs to a nudist colony. Ik if :ic as Miss Allen: McCormick and XVenger, stop talking. McCormick: You know birds of a feather stick together, Miss Allen. Cheeseworth: Yea, cuckoosf' x :r we :if Mr. Lewis ffavourite songj : You are my past, my present findicativej and my plu- perfect. 2C French Gccasional: Is this sentence com- pound or simple P Roberts: Compound to me but simple to everyone else. :if x wk an Tlzouglzfs of 2C Gillfillg an Ifxaili MarsHall llarrOn StunaP BakEr StanLey PortEr McI'herSon GanSby Miss Menzies was taking up Kerunont XVillie. lVe arrived at the point where Dickie of Dryhope runs the fausee of Sahilde through with his lance because he had ne'er a word to sayf' Right to the point, remarked Miss Menzies. - 2D Miss Laughlin: Clarke! lVhat have you been doing? Clarke: Taking part in a guessing contest. Miss Laughlin: But I thought you had a Latin exam ? Clarke: I did. :if Pk :if JF Flunked in Latin, failed in Maths, I heard him softly hiss, I'd like to find the guy who said Ignorance is bliss. l.