North Toronto Collegiate Institute - Howler Yearbook (Toronto, Ontario Canada)

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1 .S'v'z'c11ly-Eiglzl TH E H O U L E R 1 93 4 THE HOWLER STAFF WAY BACK WHEN ' ' mmosw Maw: me TMURIEL IHULLOY sag A , .Sky ,B+-xv, wg. -Af Ei? E , E: NV.. .,.. V if VONHLVH RFK ERTHEKIN if its A ., ' . -Y-'gr-M 0' mm sow har em

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THE HOIVLER, 1934 XVhy, I-Iodginoff, calm yourself. Principal Golightly stands up again to speak. Students of North Toronto Collegiate I understand that the Board of Fducaton in- tends to follow out its original entertainment policy of having the movie stars appear in person at the same schools where their pic- tures are being shown. By a great effort on my part I believe we will have the outstanding entertaimnent feature of the week. l have been able to obtain through a little pull, the services of Miss Ethel Barrymore, for next week. This, I may say is quite a victory for North Toronto, over vlarvis, who will have to be con- tent with Mae XYest. Another thing is-Say. where's the fire? questions the principal as the male student body heads for the various exits. In her eyes, sir, shouts Desmond P. Fitz- gerald. I know that- - er I mean-but boys, where are you going? To Jarvis, replies the male student body. lust a moment, I didn't know that you felt that way about her. I will arrange to have her come up and see you some- Go- lightly, realizing what he has just said, breaks off without nnishing the quotation. You see it was this way, boys, I thought that she Mae NVest' your time. The male student body sits down. VVell, I am glad that you are sitting down again. Ure could not stand that last one, replies the M.S.B. Yes, of course, er, oh this assembly is now dismissedf, mumbled a fast-sinking figure on the stage. In case you are interested in the time, it is now 2.15. Not only is this story entertaining, but it is educational. For what other article brings you the correct time. t And also the paper that it is written on, matches my little blue hat. Don't you think so, George ? - Yes, I think so Gracie, and I think that it would have been a good idea, if the matches got in touch with the story, before the publishers did.j While George Burns is saying those cute things, I will chronologically list the events from 2.15 to 3.30. 2.15-I entered the Chemistry room and Page Sci'wily-.S'cz'f'1z saw a Mickey- Mouse cartoon and the first reel of a picture on the Metallurgy of Silver. 2.-I5-I entered the French class, and heard Maurice Chevalier sing three new French songs through the medium of the talkies . 2.5551 started a systematic tour of the vari- ous class rooms and picked up dictaphone records, left for students who missed the les- sons of the previous day. 3.05-I wandered in the Ancient History room and began rummaging through copies of Ijatin papers. Finally, I am rewarded by see- ing my name on one of the papers dated 193-. I then wonderd if I could graduate, and if so, when. 3.15-I entered the bridge room and sat down at one of the tables with Don Lowry and Bob Mitchell. tYes, some of the old guard are still left in the schooll Not being able to find a fourth student, we decided to invite a Matlieinatics teacher, who was kibitizing at one of the other tables, to join us. Glad to, gentlemen. Nkhat are the stakes? You know it adds interest to the game. How does a fiftieth suit you, sir? asked Don. NVell, I believe that if we play .-173c for every G7 7-10 points, it would give you some added arith- metic training. Sort of killing two birds with one stone. Part II.-Paradise Los! At 3.30 the radio was turned on and the Principals voice was heard to say, Students of North Toronto Collegiate: I have hitherto given you the utmost liberty in every phase of our school life. Most of you appreciated this and disported yourselves very satisfactorily. Unfortunately, there were the odd ones who took advantage of this freedom. A few moments ago it was my displeasure to notice some of the students playing a game commonly known as 'African Golf'. I was then forced to take away their pair of dice. And this, dear reader, is how the students lost their Paradise. ai: if is :if Why do you look in the mirror so much ? asked the married man of the pretty new maid. XVell, the mistress told me to watch myself when you were around.

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THE HOlVLER,1934 Page St'1'u11ty'-.X'111e l EXCHAN T' ' -i i Like everything else, the Exchange page is very apt to become monotonous with its constructive and destructive criticism: consequently, in an attempt to escape from the beaten path, we are giving you excerpts from the magazines that have been received in this department. llluizaiz .'l1lt1I3'f.'t't1 Symbol-lY.0. A member of the human family. Occurence: Found wherever man exists. Physical properties: All colours and sizes. Always appears in disguised condition. Sur- face of face seldom unprotected by coating of paint or film of powder. Boils at nothing. May freeze at any moment. However, melts when properly treated. Very bitter if not used correctly. Chemical properties: lfxtremely active. Possesses great atiinity for gold, silver, plati- num and precious stones of all kinds. Violent reaction when left alone by men. Ability to absorb all sorts of expensive food. Turns green when placed next to a better appearing sample. Fresh variety has great magnetic attraction. Note.-CHighly explosive and lilcely to be dangerous in inexperienced hands.l Vox Lycei, Central Collegiate Institute, llainilton, Ont, af wt: lk an E1'0IIIflItlfltllI.v There is something definitely wrong with examinations. The defect is that they are too boring. They are not interesting enough. No- body's faltering spirits have ever been rallied by thc chilling words, XVrite a detailed ac- count. Nor has the awful phrase, ln about three pages, describe-, ever helped an aspir- ing scholar to pass. A good motto for those who set examina- tion papers would be, UA laugh every line. To this end, the numbering could be done in some original fashion. There could be con- tests in numbering questions, and the teacher who numbered the examination paper so that the student could not tell how the questions followed one another would get some little prizeva counting board for instance. A paper composed entirely of misprints, instead of only one quarter as they are now, would be a novelty lviirsiesillg many great adx antages. For instance each question would have three or four possible answers. Then there is the idea of aslzing questions without giving any marlcs for them. This nould certainly lfeep the pupil alert. lf he couldn't answer the question he would not lose anytliing, and if he could an- swer it the examiner would probably find out something he did not linow before. illotfrl I.I'ft'I't!I'IlI't' Ptifm' Question. the lfirstf Name any book you happen to have read. tlf the pupil is not in the habit of reading books he need not answer this question. There are no marks for it anyway. lt was just asked out of curiosity.l The Second Questions Quote from meznory the following gems: tal The Farmer in the l7ella20 verses. tbl ,lulius Caesar, .Xct 1, Scene Il, line 2007 to line '2lllU inclusive. Somebody has l'Jl'tJll'flll it to the author's attention that there are no such lines. That is all right. Nobody said there were. Pupils will do either questions one and two or fail. Lux 1Slebanaffmlttawa. :k ak lk fi: Also aclznowledging: The Twigwbniversity of Toronto Schools. The McMaster lNlonthlyfMcMaster lfniversity. 1. iarneau licho-lidinonttin, Alberta. Acta Ridleanafliidley College. Tech Tatler-Danforth Tech. lilevator-Belleville Collegiate. The Mitre-L'niversity of Bishops College. The Review-London Central Collegiate. The Argosy--Saclcville, N.B. Blue 8: Gold-Mount Herman School, North Point P.O., Darjeeling, India. The Kings School--Parramatta, Australia.