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Page 33 text:
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THE MIRROR THE FRESHMAN AND THE TEACHER or (A sad state of affairs) There once was a Freshman who usually dined On a diet of glue and grapefruit rind, And all the day long she ' d gleefully chew On this satisfying mixture of rind and glue. A teacher came hurrying round, and he said, Tut, tut, it ' s a wonder you ' re not in bed; I ' m sure that hard work will answer the best, For Fve never believed in a complete rest. The Freshman looked round at her glue and she sighed And, Teachers ought to know best, she replied, But much the most answering thing she knew Was that satisfying mixture of rind and glue. The Teacher stood frowning and shaking his head. Then he polished his spectacles slowly, and said, We ' ll try some equations, they ' ll please you Fm sure. And the declining of nouns is an excellent cure. So the poor little Freshman sat up all night, And worked till she nearly died at the sight Of a hard equation, or a difficult verb, Or a rather unusual Latin word. Then all day long she ' d be learning things, She knew the dates and could name the kings Of almost every land on earth — But she didn ' t count that of any worth! The Teacher gleefully rubbed his hands And said, There ' s nobody quite understands These cases as I do. The cure has begun. I pride myself on how well I have done. But the Freshman sat with her eyes shut tight, And happily smiled as she shut out the sight Of Latin and Math, and instead, her mind Was busily munching on grapefruit rind. P. S. There ' s meant to be a moral to this poem but I can ' t quite find it. !935 Page 29
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Page 32 text:
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THE MIRROR CLASS OFFICERS President Roger Butz Treasurer Larry Howe THE PERILS OF THE SANDWICH LINE (From a Freshman ' s Point of View) It was nearing ten forty-five when at the sound of the bell thousands upon thousands of seething Homo-Sapiens would pour forth from every door, nook and cranny, and with the skill that comes only after days of practice, make a dash for the Senior ' s room where the sandwich line starts. Strange visitors had better take heed from this article and glance at their watches, if they possess such, so that they will know at what time to leave the building rather than die a horrible death at the hands, or should we say the feet, of the thundering Herd. In case you don ' t know what the sandwich line is, it ' s where the Seniors, fortified behind their lock- ers, hand out the daily sandwiches. This sounds to one unknowing in the ways of Seniors, like a delightfully communistic idea, but my de-ah frens! it is far from such Usually a large proportion of the Freshmen, whose turn always comes last, go away with the pangs of hunger gnawing at their vitals, their appetites unappeased, as the Seniors take seconds or even thirds, and shout, No more. The sandwich line is literally lousy with graft and corruption. And all the poor Freshmen, who are so mistreated at the extra large hands of the Seniors, the large hands of the Juniors, the middlesized hands of the Sophomores, can say is that, There ' ll come a day. Page 28 . 1935
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