North Carolina State University - Agromeck Yearbook (Raleigh, NC)

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CHRIS WASHBURN VALVANO GIVES SHERIDAN THE BOOT USURPS!, 7C NCSU GETS SERIOUS ABOUT WASH UP TIME IN THE PROS 8C MOTLEY, OZZY TO ROCK REYNOLDS WHERE WILL WE PARK? 8B WOODY IN THE BOY ' S ROOM WOODY ALLEN: Hannah ' NOT A DIME WEDNESDAY, APRIL 1,1986 WEATHER: Ordained rain reign Plains and Maine; heavy snow, snow and more snow in Alaska; April showers bring May flowers. Non-color page. 12A. death tolls, ski conditions. 12A. BRICKYARD: N.C. See. at Agriculture James Graham drove in Friday to check spring wheat planting in the freshly tilled NCSU brickyard gardens. 2A. BUDGET: In a mock exhib- ition preparing for spring budget cuts, Chancellor Bruce Poulton cancelled NCSU sub to News Observer and Raleigh Times. IA. QUEEN SUICIDES: Parents urged to warning signs of small town beauty queens o; cluster of suicides in Our Town, lowe. 3C. EXPORT QUOTAS: UNC grad-quota extension denounced; UNC to graduate 2,031 without proper learning of life in real world without daddy ' s money; terror throughout Chapel Hell, Dean ' s SAC. IC. CAMPUS: Student Govt. puzzled after President- elect Gary V. Mauney finishes a sentence in less than 37 minutes; alien life form thought to have taken over Mauney ' s body; panic, happiness 8D. of Agriculture taken hostage by small farm animals. Dean J.E. Legates last led by heavily armed egg-producing fowl from Patterson Hall. blind-folded, mouth stuffed with apple. 3A. examination of pornographic homemade videotapes left in Philippines president Marc. has FBI officials searching NCSU for female secretary named Rodney. 6D. WASHINGTON: Which one? D.C.? The eastern N.C. city? Or the state? Huh? Which one? Damn. ABROAD: Success in finding a replacement for feminist Glornia Steinium has been a challenge since the one time activist has shacked up with Miami Vice star Philip Michael Thomas TODAY ' S DEBATE: Parking at NCSU. In NCSU TODAY, master debater ' s opinion: free, robust competition is the best way- to help us park, save time, boost the standard of parking and economy. 2A. MONEY: For nothing. Chicks are free. See the whoopsie with the earring and the make-up. Yea, buddy, that ' s his own real hair. Some as low as $19.7D. SPORTS: Atlantic Coast Conference basketball referees break down; admitted hiring from Hills. borough St. Fast Fare gut ter; shock across NCSU, world; Lenny ' s a bum! No kidding. 2B. LIFE: It like exists only at 2616, man. Like it evolves around Dave breaking on the coffee table. Totally. Aloha. 2E. : The Color Blue, of Dean Smith, opens in Tom Reed ' s On the Road Again starts production, Sly Stallone to portray NCSU coach. 4E. • ON THURSDAY: : Life in Hell: The Story of a Metcalf Resident, Read about latest in dorm security, backdoor breaking and entering and where to hide during fire alarms. AD SECTION: Beer and pregnancy testing. Two for one special at Bob ' s Bar and Baby Room. Complied by Rod Winstud REACH FOR THE RED REACH FOR THE SKY Editorials, opinions 10A Auto crashing 2C Campus 3A Free-Baseball 1C Washburn World gA Hoops 12C COPYRIGHT COVER STORY By Tellme Moore NCSU TODAY Willis Casey doesn ' t believe in spouting off every time something happens in the NCSU athletics department. Not happens in the athletics Casey has been a staple at NCSU for over 40 years, swimming coach and athletics director. Rumors about him being other kinds of office supplies are completely unfounded, department officials say. He came to this campus in 1948 to lead the Wolfpack tankers, after graduating from the University of North Carolina, where he coached swimming during World War IL teaching fledging Tar Heels how to avoid swimming into German torpedoes. Those were the good years, as the venerable Casey built one the nation ' s most swimming programs. In all, he coached 33 11 league championships and compiled a 188-29 record. Yet, he gets most of his satisfaction in the fact that every one of the athletes he recruited graduated from college, though none did so in speech-communications. Those were the days of youth, the days of innocence, the of talking in public. When asked to remember those of chlorine and lifeguards, Casey wistfully had no In 1969, he became the NCSU athletics director and quietly began building one of the nation ' s best and most organized athletics departments in the nation. Casey said of his lifelong work here at NCSU. Please see COVER STORY next page NCSU Chancellor Bruce Poulton will undergo surgery in June to remove a foreign object from his mouth, NCSU officials Poulton has been suffering from Pedis Mandere Complex, more commonly known as foot-in-mouth disease, since last fall. NCSU officials remain mystified as to the origin of the complex. According to one source, Poulton ' s foot was force.fed to him by members of the local media. But a high-placed official with the NCSU Office of Student Affairs said Poulton showed signs of. The source, a former Davidson graduate who declined to be identified, said the disease is causing Poulton great problems within the university. He can duck the media by supposedly being . -of-town, but we him to voice his opinions in staff meetings, the unidentified vice chancellor said. He has good days, the source . But we really need his input more often than he has been able to give it. However, Student Senate President Gary said NCSU has run since Poulton ' s condition was diagnosed. Since it became appar- ent that Poulton could no longer fulfill his duties because of this tragic ill- ness, I have taken a more active role in this universi- ty, Mauney said. And I think you can look around you the results. Poulton Insists that his condition is a result a to discredit him local media. They keep saying they ' re making progress, that they ' re getting better, but with a record on getting quotes right, the progress is hard to see. Poulton said following the NCSU- Carolina game at Doak Field on Tuesday. As far as I ' m concerned we could bar them from campus tomorrow, Poulton said. Anna Keller ' s husband said that he did not know anything on the situation right now, but encouraged NCSU TODAY to contact him later. Reacting to several of North Carolina students ' erection of shanties on their campus protesting the South African government ' s repressive policies toward blacks, a hive drawn a Line of Death stretching from Pullen Road, along the railroad tracks that divide campus. to Dan Allen Drive. McClure, chairman of the conservative group Re. mber ' 84, which drew em the imaginary line. If Chapel Hill students use campus space to make their statement, why can ' t a 2-inch wide strip of to make ours? When questioned about if NCSU students, who so far respected the group ' s wishes by not ing through either tunnel, decided to cross the Line of Death, McClure re- sponded, We would shoot at them. It would be part of making our point. Meanwhile, Chancellor Bruce Poulton said Tues. day that the group could maintain defense of its line for a week, and that he would decide then if the group could remain I just think it ' s great to see students finally becoming active. and making statements Poulton said. Meanwhile, three separate incidents of students being shot at were reported Tuesday night. Public Safety is rumored to have -fled campus, not wishing to endanger lives with open conflict. Casey retires as long-time AD on happy note: ' I ' m so happy I don ' t know what to say. ' By Shant E. Rector NCSU TODAY By Lush S. Meegh During his recent mystic about Woodstock in 1969, much as a six of NCSU TODAY journey through Bong Rad plans allegedly said. Cheerwine. Valley and the Haze the lower intramural fields Here are the rules and will be The massive Wolfstock Nebulon, The Rad said he the night before Wolfstock suggestions for the party: hibited without an NCSU co ncert scheduled for April rapped with late legendary to conjure the fantastic •A crowd of 70,000 is ID. 19 at Harris Field may rockers Simi Hendrix, Jim four who have expressed expected, so leave early • Revealing bathing have a few surprising Morrison, John Bonhom interest in performing at and wear your seatbelt. suits be prohibited. guests, according to NCSU and Sid Vicious. the concert. •Alcohol will be pro- •Girl Scouts will serve TODAY psychic The dudes were like so Just dear it with my . Students, however, cookies and milk. .1. hyped when I told them agent, baby, Hendrix, who will be allowed to bring in We just want the dies to have good, clean fun, Sgt. Larry Liles of Public Safety said. Angels protest, Full lIst of ell lance, aO. Students poisoned We know this year ' s performance will be hard to top, he , but we ' ll give it the old college try. Clark Infirmary, despite the heavy workload, handled the crisis very professionally, according to director Jerry Baker. It got kind of hairy there for a while, he said. When we ran out of beef bags we had to hang a few students out the window. To make this work we had to put some of the vomit patrol - we called them ViP ' s. The ' s caught on quick, aided by the inspira- tional help of NCSU ' s re- covering Chancellor Bruce R. Poulton. You should have seen Bruce go. It made all proud to call him our own, he said. Actually, the system worked so well we, Food poisoning NCSU Food poisoning at NCSU soared way above average last month as good outbreak shattered all existing records. It usually takes us until said AD White, director of University Dining. This year we knocked it out in one lucky And what a swoop it Herb, did not eat at the Dining Han. The specific reason was unclear. White said the poison scene By Quake R. Quick Grits NCSU TODAY Officer Bob described the scene as both pastoral and touching. Boy, was he hung! Woods was last seen with gasoline-filled mason jars, running toward the campground where PAST Angry members of PAST (Pack ' s Athletic Supporter Team) lynched Student Senator Perry Woods after he allegedly attacked their campground with explosives. Public Safety officer Billy Bob found Woods gently swinging in the OF ACRONYMS: Striking With Annihilating Tools (SWAT) prepare. for Hillsborough Street brawl against Students With Awesome Tools (SWAT). TOMORROW IN NCSU TODAY: WHY DUKE CHOKED April Fools spoof of USA TODAY 30 Features

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Chancellor for Student Affairs Dr. Thomas H. Stafford, Jr. Roger Winstead (2) Features 29

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Summer spoof of Spectator Magazine Since 1986. The Longest Copulation Nudesweekly in South Scranton. Your Guide To What To Go In And Where The Corruption of a Conservative Cartoonist Feature, p.13 The High Cost of Book Buy Back Hal Complainer: Thr wing Up On America Bruce Poulton REVIEWS `Ed McMahon Superstar ' Heathcliff Rock Maynard Roll Rest of the Triangle Winners `Sir Walter Raleigh the 13th ' Books: ' Stick Ninja ' ' Spam ' `Long Legs ' Don King in ' Hair ' Don King Features 31