North Carolina State University - Agromeck Yearbook (Raleigh, NC)

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UNIVERSITY OF NORTH CAROLINA Entrance Examination Prepared by the Board of very little Education The questions below ore considered to be general, and should be cosily answered in a matter of four years. If you run into any difficulty, forget it. MATH: 1. If Tom takes 12 gallons of gas from a 100 gallon tank the first day, 15 gallons away the second day and 21 gallons on the third day, how long will it be before they take Tom away? 2. If John can write a 5,000 word term paper by hand in 10 hours, how long would it take him if he used o pencil? 3. A con pick 2 bushels of apples in one day; B con pick 4 bushels of apples in a day and a half and C can pick 9 bushels in three days. How many bushels of apples could be picked if people were doing the picking? 4. A 96 pound projectile is fired upward of a 60 degree angle and with on initial velocity of 3200 feet per second. How deep will the projectile sink into the ground if the last rain come on Tuesday of last month? 5. Mr. Bratwurst is driving his 3800 pound car 60 miles per hour or 88 feet per second when he hits o 5600 pound truck parked on the street. If the two cou- pled vehicles move 5.75 feet and stop in 2.48 seconds, was Mr. Brotwurst drinking? Answer the ten questions intelligently by using the context of the abstract printed below. Use short answers only—save your lengthy discussion for the Social Studies Department. When the tochypnoco sque-teague pozzuolona arrived, the whidah bird zizith zymurgy xerophthalmio chlamydote fluosilicote hydrargyriasis exothecium odontornithic. Due to the passifloraceous kriegspiel lycanthrope strophanthiu s xiphophyllous yoldring sympelmous, the harbinger physiognomy abrogate stil- licidium of the thrombosis devoured in hexachlorophene which emulsified all hali- tosis and coronaries that are corrigendum monophyletic dystrophic cysticercus syzygiol rynd pyxidium dysuria hyperostasis lythraceaus and GL-71 (that ' s nor- mal GL-70 with on extra GL thrown in to take care of cancer). (From a short poem by Nick Kenny) 1. Who is Irving making out with? 2. Is Mack, the Knife, back on the scene? 3. If the above is so, how many records of his popular song, Cement Bogs , did he sell? 4. What is the name of the new Kellogg ' s cereal that does not snap, crackle or pop but just lies there in one soggy mess? 5. What is a hydraulic? Hint: It might be a shovel with a handle on both ends. 6. Will the earth come to a dramatic end on April 21, 1953? 7. Was General Grant killed by a flask of lightning? 8. Have you tried Peter Pon ' s Pconut Butter? 9. Have you ever token or even seen such a ridiculous exam? 10. What the dickens is a whidah bird? 6

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The following sentences or phrases should be completed with the most correct answer from the choices listed below. If you do not agree with the given choices, you are to be commended. HISTORY 1. George Washington chopped down the cherry tree because. . (a) he thought it wos the best woy to net it down. (b) he thought it would be a good way to get into politics. (c) it blocked his view of his 22 year old blond neighbor ' s sun porch. (d) he thought it was a bush. 2. Abraham Lincoln wore a beard because. . (a) by his not being a baseball player, he and the Gillette people did not see eye to eye. (b) he had a hole in his chin. (c) on particular social outings he needed some means to get a hold of him- self. (d) it was the only way that his mother could tell who he was. 3. The following occurred at the Boston Tea Party.... (a) everyone went and had o good time. (b) an organized yachting regatta resulted. (c) Jonathon Ferd found a silver bullet in his tea. (d) Frederick Fotchmore found the Lone Ranger in his tea. 4. Magellan was the first man to. . (a) fly to the moon on an Army Redstone six stage self-laminated rocket. (b) swim the Pacific. (c) make a classic of Chuck Berry ' s rock ' n roll hit, Motor Cooled Down . (d) beat Wyatt Earp to the draw. 5. Alton Bogle cleaned out the West by.... (a) using Lestoil, (b) leaving. (c) finding gold in the East. (d) stealing everything he could get his hands on. 6. Due to the depression of 1929. .. . (a) Babe Ruth hit only 52 home runs. (b) Maverick wos forced to quit playing poker. (c) everyone was depressed. (d) M. 0. had to sell its jeep. The following is a comprehensive tabulation of the results of the previous college entrance examination, prepared and given by the Board of little or no Education. From the results one can clearly see that any likeness or relationship to any college student is purely the truth. Caution: Before reading results; take a tranquilizer, open o win- dow, take a scot and get a firm grip on yourself. 23% 18% couldn ' t find the right room went to sleep during the quiz 36% didn ' t bring a pencil 14% have been sent back to high school 2% got their finger caught in the pencil sharpener 6% gave up 2% cut the examination 101% Some idiot took the examination twice—he liked it! 7