North Bay Collegiate Institute and Vocational School - Northland Echo Yearbook (North Bay, Ontario Canada)

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66 THE NORTI-ILAND ECHO Special Commercial S is for Sorry we entered this room, P is for Pupils who foresee their doom. E is for Elderlies still on this course, C is for Commerce, we learn of full force. I is for Idiots who don't even mind, A is for Answers they can't seem to find. L is for Laggards, we always come late. C is for Corpses, that'll be our fate. O is for Orders. letters and bills. M is for Money spent on our pills. M is for Millions of letters we type, E is for Errors we make in them-Yipe ! l R is for Ready to get out at five, C is for Cheers that we are still alive. I is for Irritating-all of our work, A is for Attitude-done with a smirk. L is for Love we send to you all- Hoping to see you again here next Fall. By-Molly M. Caught! Reg, even if your girlfriend is sentimental, it is still no excuse for advertising it the way you did one Monday. And don't tell us it was red ink, either. Was it cherry? raspberry? or did you notice? FORM IXG MR. J. R. THOMSON DAVE JOHNSTON, Repre. Indecisive Visitor: And how old are you, Bobbie?i' Bobbie D.: I'm just at the awkward age. Visitor: l'Really? And what do you call the awkward age? Bobbie D.: I'm too old to cry and too young to swear. HOME JAMES Drunk: Cto a splendidly uniformed by-stander.J Shay, call me a cab will you? Uniformed by-stander: My good man, I am not a doorman, I am a naval officerfi Drunk: Aw right, then call me a boat. I gotta get home. THE STOOGE A friend talking to a badly wounded comrade. Say friend, why are you so shot up? Well, I was zig-zagging bulletsn. How come you got hit? Well, I zigged when I should have zaggedf' KNEW HIS FATHER Mother: So, son, you are going to marry a chorus girl. Is she the kind of a girl you can bring home and in- troduce to your mother and sister? Son: Sure, Mom, but I'd hate to trust her with the old man. PLAY SAFE The barber was dark and swarthy, and his eyes were black and spark- ling. It was evident that he was descended from Latin stock. What do you think of the Italian situation?,' he inquired of the customer. What is your opinion of Mussolini? The same as yours, replied the man in the chair. But how do you know my opinionf, inquired the startled barber. I don't , admitted the man, but you have the razor. CLASS ACTIVITIES Detentions. The pre- vious year MacParland held the leading num- ber of detentions, but this year, two new leaders have shown themselves to be very popular among the teachers. Devine and La- fontaine are running neck and neck. f'Who will win? Which one will receive the detention medal for l940? It is just a matter of waiting. XC VOCATIONAL MR. K. E. THOMSON, C. A. Brown, Repre. What We Should Like To Know 1. Why has Turner such a solemn expres- sion, it wouldn't be love? Or would it? 2. Why has Mr. McCann gone around with a smile on his face the last few days. 3. Why Mr. McCann is so amused by cer- tain writings in S. Dalyls books. 4. Who Kernel Turner refers to by C.D.F.A. S. Mr. McCann-Turner do you wear a hat to school? Turner-Yes Sir. Mr. McCann-It's a good thing you use your head for something. 6. If Mr. McCann ever really played the Harmonica? - XC VOCATIONAL BILL WARNER Domestic Incident During housecleaning time Raycraft's wife informed him that he would have to dispose of the remaining whiskey bottles in his basement and this is his story as related to me. I had twelve bottles of whiskey in my cellar and I was ordered to empty the contents of each down the sink, so I started to work.

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THE NORTHLAND ECHO 55 Anita: If a bomb fell in a field and a bull ate it, what is an adjective to describe it? Barbara C: I'll bite. What? Anita: Abominable. And if the bomb ex- ploded? Barbara: Okay. Spill it. Anita: Noble. School Daze Is Right Did anyone notice the dazed expression Betty Harris was wearing before Christmas? That was because she was dying to be Whitham. Did it seem long, Betty? Oh, Doris! As Doris Beattie says after 3 years of A1- gebra in the Collegiate Department: Algebraic symbols are used when you don't know what you're talking about. WHAT WOULD WE DO WITHOUT MURPH? He carries a lot of weight with the teachers as well as in his shoes. Remember The Day? When Vel Martin had all the girls dying to read a leaflet about Eleven Ways to Win Your Man. But were they let down when they found out it was eleven cheese recipes! When Miss Walker asked jenkins to run up the blind for her. When Mr. Foster blamed the moon for the fact we didn't have our homework done. We have come to the conclusion that Mr. Foster knows Special pretty well. When the gramophone broke down and Special typed the same line about ten times before they woke up. When Miss Walker told us she ran across a friend one day. Miss Walker, how could you be so heartless! ISN'T IT QUEER how Barbara McGonega1 absolutely insists on getting a front seat in As- sembly? Maybe the exquisite colours of that jeep sweater in 4B attract her. Purple and orange are a perfect combination, aren't they Barb? SPECIALS STILL LAUGHING about the story of how one of our dashing colleagues was called down to the office only to find an invita- tion to a Christmas dance awaiting him. Won- der if it's been done before? Trust Special to be original, eh Reg? Ain't It The Truth? We hear Dawn Overholt's been doing quite a bit moonlight skiing lately. Is it the moon? the skiing or what? that get's her. Special Boners A skeleton is a man with his inside out and his outside off. Rhubarb is a kind of celery gone bloodshot. A sinister is an old maid. A Soviet is a cloth used by waiters in hotels. Average means something hens lay on. Magnet is a thing you find in a bad apple. An octopus is a person who hopes for the best. A toreador is a really bad storm. A spinster is a bachelor's wife. l You Said lt! Why don't angels in heaven have mous- taches? Because men only get to heaven with a close shave. i Hold Tight! Of course, everyone in Special has at least one of those what-did-the-something-say-to- the-something-else'i up his sleeve. Here's some of them: What did the big fire-cracker sav to the little fire-cracker?-My pop is bigger than your POP- What did the beach say to the tide?-Well, come on in. What did one owl say to the other in the rain?-It's not too-wet-to-woo. What did the rug say to the floor?-Stick- em-up! I've got you covered. What did the grass seed say to the sod?- I wanta be a-lawn. What did the calf say to the silo?-Is my fodder in there? Overheard In Special Mr. Foster: This'1l kill you, if those other 160 exercises don't. CSay it with a smilej Biff Gigg: Ain7t lost yet! Mr. Franklin: Got that? Miss MacNamara: UTIME! ! l Miss Gardner: Now SPECIAL---and etc. Scotty Skellern: Going skating to-night? Betty McGonegal: Everything happens to me! Mr. Psutka: CWhen the class is marching in single filej By the left, smartly now, quick march.

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THE NORTHLAND ECHO 67 I withdrew the cork from the first bottle, poured the contents down the sink with the ex- ception of one glass, which I drank. I then withdrew the cork from the second bottle and did likewise, with the exception of one glass which I drank. I extracted the cork from the third bottle, emptied the good old booze down the sink, ex- cept a glass, which I devoured. I pulled the cork from the fourth sink and poured the bottle down the glass, which I drank some. I pulled the bottle from the cork of the next and drank one sink out of it, then threw the rest down the sink. I pulled the sink out of the next cork and poured the bottle down my neck. I pulled the next bottle out of my neck and poured the cork down the sink, all except the sink, which I drank. I pulled the next cork from my throat and poured the sink down the bottle and drank the cork. Well. I had them all emptied and I steadied the house with one hand and counted the bot- tles, which were twenty-four, so I counted them again when they came around again and I had seventy-four, and as the houses came around again I counted them and finally I had all the houses and the bottles counted, and I pro- ceeded to wash the bottles, but I couldn't get the brush in the bottles, so I turned them inside out and washed and wiped them all, and went upstairs and told my other half all about what I did. Oh, Boy! I've got the wifest little nice in the whole world! Bill Warner Song of The Industrials Dedicated to XC Vocational Chorus: The form 2C as told to me, Consists of boys, Who hope to be, The leading men of Industry. Solo: Mr. K. E. T. Mechanics as they ought to be! Repair the cars like A, B, C, But if the job was left to me, The cars would run fit to a T. CChorusJ Solo: Mr. H. W. W. We now bring forth our specialities, Our drafting boys of 2C-E, Whose excess work when piled on me, Would be the best of form 2C. CChorusJ Solo: Mr. R. P. The biggest shock that's yet to be, Is the electrical boys of 2C-D, Whose completed work when checked by me, Is never what it ought to be. CChorusJ Trio: FOR I'M THE HEAD OF INDUSTRY! CChorusj W. Warner and E. C. Wells XIB VOCATIONAL MISS D. DENYES JOY KENNEDY, MR. E. MCCANN ANDY REPOL, Representatives. Tech-Tattler During class Mr. McCann removes his coat, shoves off his trusty canoe and paddles fifteen miles Cwith his shoes offj to prove to G. Cock- burn that it is possible to go fifteen and not fifty miles per day in a canoe. For further par- ticulars on the art of paddling apply to Mr. McCann or your local newspaper. We wish to extend to the boys who left school before Christmas, to take jobs in Quebec and Southern Ontario, the best of luck. May you all advance in position and experience in your chosen trade. To you all from 3A and 3B Vocational. Mr. McCann: What was P. G. Wodehouse noted for? E. Valenti in stage whisper: UP. 85 G. Soapfi Mr. McCann Cmisunderstandingj That's correct, stand up and tell it to the class. Why was Barbara M. W. so anxious to sit next to Grainger in a detention? Why does B. Fraser continually get in Mr. Thomson's hair? Does he do it just to be a nuisance or maybe he likes to hear Mr. T. talk? He has a wonderful voice as we too well know. An Eyefull A gentleman in the optical business was in- structing his apprentice, McGirr in the tech- nique of chiseling a fair and honest price out of a customer. He said, McGirr, after you have fitted the glasses to a customer and the cus- tomer asks, What's the charge? you should say: The charge is ten dollars .