Newtown High School - Newtowner Yearbook (Elmhurst, NY)

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of edibles. He uses a pusher. This is usually a piece of bread that goes around like a shovel cleaning the snow off the ground in winter. After observing these three methods of using a fork, I have finally come to the conclusion that they are all insane and indirect and too much work. Therefore I recommend that the practice of eating, which occurs only three times out of a day of 24: hours, should be given up. In its place one can take some vitamin pills that are just as nourishing and which take no trouble at all because one need not jab them, stab them, push them, or shovel them with a fork. RUTH Wann Itfs a Mania World I HAVE BEEN told, ever since I was a small boy, that it is a man's world. But I have been slowly disillusioned until now I not only doubt that it is a. ma.n's world, but firmly believe that it belongs to the so-called weaker sex. If a boy is hurrying through the halls to his next class and he bumps into a girl, who drops her books, he must of course apologize and pick them up. But if she is hurrying, and his books fall, he must also apologize and pick up his books. Have you ever stood in line in the lunch room and seen a girl push in ahead of a boy? If the boy dared tell her to go to the end of the line, he would be frowned upon, not only by the girls, but also by those of his own sex. Ah-h, for the good old days when only boys were considered important enough to be educated. But women wanted equal educational opportunities, and now that they have them, they still expect to be treated as they were when knighthood was in flower. If they are the weaker sex, it is only because they have been babied and pampered since they were born, and led to think that boys and men were put on earth merely to do the bidding of the fair sex. So the next time a girl knocks my books from my hands, I will probably apologize and pick them up. After all, what can a person do when the male sex is as firmly opposed to any change as the women are? FRED McCain-uv 11

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ON USING A FORK PRIMITIVE man had no implements for eating that exist today, and therefore he used the old faithful extremities. He didn't have to worry himself to a frazzle about the manner in which he picked up the cutlery or the way he held or used it. He thought that food should be put into the mouth as quickly as possible. In these advanced and civilized times QI often wonder if they arej we come to the stage where man now employs a little, delicate instrument known as the fork. It is supposed to keep our hands clean and help us to get our -food into our mouth, but what I have observed seems to indicate another picture to the story. In the corner of the restaurant, where he hopes no one can see him, a timid man shyly sits down to indulge in some dainty morsel. He picks up his fork as if it might break and then starts to take up his food. He tries once, then twice, then a third time but he is unsuccessful in his efforts to pick up the little rolly-polly peas which seem to be playing tag with him. First he goes after it, it rolls away. Then another try but it rolls again. This time it is halted by a staunch mountain of potatoes. Then, finally a hit is made and the pea, one lone pea, is brought onto the fork. A sigh of relief is ut- tered, but just before reaching the mouth plop goes the pea and falls on the plate. He knows stabbing food is not the right thing to do so now he must renew his strength and continue this endless struggle for existence. There is another man in that restaurant, but he, a mighty man, has no worry about who sees him. It is even better for his social life if many see him. He takes his fork and holds on to it as if he were to make a kill. He holds on to it so tightly that I don't think heaven or earth could make him re- lease his weapon. He makes a plunge and jabs the carrot through the neck. The kill is made. The man, who has this method of using his fork, never fails to make his kill for just below the waist is a part of the body which seems to protrude a little. And now we see a man that has no regard for appearance. It seems that he has a little trouble getting into the seat. This man could rightly be called a baby blimp. When he takes his fork in hand, he makes a little moun- tain of meat, potatoes and spinach on it. He thinks a fork is a steam shovel onto which one piles heaps. He also uses a fantastic method to get this peak 10

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AMERICAS FAVORITE GAME THE ORIGIN of baseball is obscure, but in the United States, Abner Doubleday got up a scheme for playing it in 1830. In the New England States in 1830 there was a game called townball which was played on a square Held at the corners of which were four-foot posts which were used as the bases. To score, the players had to run around these posts, and if they were hit by a thrown ball they were out. The side that got 100 runs first, won. Later the game was modified a little and bags were used instead of posts. The game was limited to nine innings and the number of players fixed at nine. It was ruled also that the ball was to be tossed to the batter. This is not very im- like the modern game. The first match game between clubs was played on the old race-course in Flushing, Long Island, New York, in 1831. From then on the game grew in popularity and new clubs were organized and new rules were set down and there were salaries for the players. In the beginning of baseball, fully two- thirds of the spectators bet on the games. Wagers totaling S100,000 were reported on one game in Philadelphia, while in some cities a special booth in the grandstand, in charge of an auctioneer, sold pools on the game. There were no long sessions of pre-game practice in the early games of organized baseball. Teams appeared on the field five minutes before the game started. Players have a language of their own to describe incidents, individuals, and plays in the game. Listed below are some of the more familiar expressions used by diamond performers: An els-Small white clouds .if I ,V p, 5 . 1..: 1 ,-I .f' ,',v 3,,':'-.ff-!,r.'l -f , . Y . IQ: - ...I .Q helpful in Judging lugh ihes. iz ,QM iffaifijfjr Bullpen,-Extreme section of fit ..'- the Playing field, reserved for 125. i' ft:.2f'?fz'V:' :LE '.i':'fsi11?f - - - '-Q':f-'i .,Q:g.1Z,..'EpLV:' warming up relief pitchers. ' 1 .a?2i, '.'i, ?Y!-'C . . .gif . 'rw Oman or zll-Baseball. ,fu .- .I . 4 -1 .ff :L-3 1 ' ff' 'Q Teacher-Manager. fi' 'ii-: 1 . f Wolves-Spectators who con- 'e f ' . 3 M15 . A'V'ff.i-K'-:silff stantl ride a la er or team. .T -.-,.. X Tin , u .ff'f. ' liar Q sy ' x Q. Tools of ign0ra'n.ce-Catch- 'fS:.2x1,,g -'framtrdii 43309 .iii-'arf , - I! ralph - X, Sg3:Q+'-gg er s paraphernalia. X -.' X :: Bxsp. 1, yt, Sweetheart-A star player, ONilLL SQA '-YQ vigai.-x D 1 h , h lf --+1 I --,gpg 1 X -an usual yt epitc er. ':.:.:.:.:.:.j.:.:.j.:.: Qin T Blind Tom 01' T0bb6T1UIH' ,me U, :fri '::..'-'-Q:-I-:ff-fl . r pue- ,' I .gizf ' Gillette-A ball thrown at the 'V -3 HFEEQQIT-.1 T ,EA , fg' ,mv batter's head. 12