Newtown High School - Bugle Yearbook (Newtown, CT)

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i l . iv. 'x 8 THE BUGLE TheGunmcm CProse Parody on tfThe Highwaymanw of Alfred Noyes.D SHORT, stocky man opened the door of Celan's All-Night Restaurant 1 w and entered warily, stepping quickly out of the frame of light that was the doorway. The air was dusky with smoke and strongly tainted with i a mingled odor of fish and cabbage. A girl in a dirty apron had been sweeping with her back to the door, at the sound of his entrance she turned. Hello, Joell. U lLo, Gert. Get me a ham and coffee, will ya? Tell that lousy white-faced cook to snap to itl'! left ii v ' L? 9:1 tkgga The girl raised her voice. HHam and coffee, Slinky. She turned to resume her sweeping, but the loudly dressed man recalled her. UGertf' f'What d'ya want, pie?'7 f'Naw. Lissen, will ya come with me to the dance at Stonils tonight?l' HCan,t. The old man wouldnit let mef' tfCouldn't ya sneak out or somethin'? 4'Say, I could pretend I was goin' to the movies with Mabel, then leave her at the dump over to 50th street and slip over to Stonils. I'd have to start early, though, 'cuz the movies begin at tenfl 'KWell, I couldnlt be there till half past, but ya could wait fer me, couldnit ya, kid P 'fSure, Illl wait. Sh- herels my old man. Want pie?'l Not tonight. How much for this? Fifteen, He rose slowly, laid a half dollar on the table and left. Half an hour later Slinky Smith stole from the kitchen and threaded his way through the slum district to a shuttered house beside the warehouse of R. B. Frank and Co. Gert Celan showed no hesitation as she approached the dark and seemingly deserted building that was Stonils, and dropped a slip of paper into the mail slot. A moment later the door swung back revealing a semi-dark interior and a very stiff butler. The girl slipped inside, the door swung to, and Gert was in- side the most exclusive night club in Chicago. 'fHas Scarface Joe got here yet? she queried. UNO, madam. Do you wish to wait for him in here? indicating the cloak- room. Sure, I'm not fussy. She walked slowly into the room. Faintly from far down the hall came dreamy music. 'fGee, wish joe 'ud hurry. V A figure materialized from behind the door and advanced slowly, gun in hand. The figure spoke, Keep your trap shut, see? When Joe Williams comes, don't try to warn him. If you do-V' He tapped the little black thing that he held. And don't forget, Mug Riley don't never miss, see, never!

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T H E B U G L E 7 Two Dou't Mako cz Pair ,fi ISS Matilda and Miss Belinda, being sisters, had for forty years or so, made it a point to be absolutely different from each other. Miss Ma- tilda was very tall, very thin Cif you are impolite, you'd call it skinnyl and very precise. She was the elder, so she held sway over Belinda, a Sif y' frivolous creature of a mere forty-three years. Plump, rosy-faced, with V' rather pretty dimpled hands, Belinda affected kittenish ways and a girlish giggle. Every afternoon at three olclock Miss Matilda might be seen going north with her dog and Miss Belinda south with her cat. They walked. It was the only point on which they agreed, though their reasons were different. Belinda would bridle and toss her head and say that it ffkept one's figgerf' Matilda would raise her brows, draw her lips to a thin line and wheeze that Hit was only human to take fOswaldine' for an airing . Then at six o'clock, on their return, Miss Belinda would put over her little tea-pot and Miss Matilda would make her coffee. After supper, Belinda would read poetry about such touching subjects as 'fDeathless Lovely and the f'Garden at Sunset . These were her two favorites. Committing them to memory had been her evening occupation for a long time and her recitation aloud of certain choice passages disturbed Matilda in her knitting. The two didn't mix. Matilda would be saying, 'fknit one, pearl one, knit two, pearl one, knit three, pearl one . Belinda would come back with, 'fIn his eyes there burned a light like that above, Which seemed to the maid a deathless love . It was confusing, Matilda would find herself saying, ffknit his eyes and pearl two lightsw, and Belinda would murmur, 'fKnitted with pain, the maiden pearled to heaven . Sunday night was the climax of the week. After eating, both the ladies would return to their rooms. While they are there, I'll tell you a secret. They had a beau. One beau. He had been trying to make up his mind between them for twenty years. Often he escorted them both home from a husk- ing bee. The poor chap was equally impressed with Matilda's preciseness and Belinda's coyness. Like the persistent fellow he was, he paid consistent atten- tions to them both. It didn't pay to be hasty. As usual, on this Sunday night, Miss Matilda got downstairs first. Her black silk dress, white waist and gold chain looked truly regal as she bustled about the room, putting it in order! Oh, a knock at the door! Miss Matilda puts a nervous hand to her smooth coiffure. No stray hairs. Then walking in a stately fashion, she admits the swain who has been cooling his heels without. Good evening, Hosea, I did not expect to see you tonightv. When Hosea Higgens enters the parlor from the dark hall it is evident that he is a happy medium between the two sisters. In contrast to Matilda's slimness he is fat, very fat, and in contrast to Belindals small stature he is very tall. As soon as this most gracious gentleman has eased himself into the one comfortable chair which the room boasts, Belinda enters. She advances with lit- tle mincing steps, her dress held so as to make visible a rather neat ankle, which Hosea ogles furtively. A marvel of crimped hair, blue satin flounces, and ruf- Hes, she goes up to Mr. Higgens and, giggling coquettishly the while, says, Oh, Mr. Hosea, I wasnlt expecting you tonight? During the course of the evening each sister is tactfully left alone with the swain for exactly five minutes. This gives ample time for him to propose. But he never has. It doesn't pay to be hasty. EDNA WULFF, '3O.

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THE BUGLE 9 Slowly Gert sat down and swept the room with a practical eye. Gradually she made out the figures of at least four other men, still and silent, menacing. Mug Rileyls gang! Using her as a decoy, the dirty crooks. She started involun- tarily as the outer door opened and shut. Suppose that were Joe! Sheld have to warn him. But that dark blotch by the doorway was one, of the most cold- blooded murderers in the city. When a feminine laugh tinkled in the hallway, she was so relieved that she almost fainted. 4 The next second renewed the ordeal. The front door opened and shutg a masculine tread approached the cloakroom. mln here, you say? . V Yes, sir, hang it on any hook. The young lady is waiting for you in the main sitting roomf' , The knob rattled. In a second, handsome, iiashily dressed Joe Williams would be weltering in his blood upon that spotless carpet. If Gert screamed, he would come to avenge her-get killed himself! No, she must not scream. She jumped up. A spurt of flame cut the murk. The walls rang. Outside there was the sound of retreating footsteps, the slam of a door, silence. Two a. m. struck in the church tower. Four shadows detached themselves from the denser shadows of R. B. F rank's warehouse and advanced stealthily toward the closely shuttered house. Suddenly one of the shadows threw itself on the ground. Duck, Joe! The short stocky shadow turned fiercely. 'fDuck? Duck from that? Illl break him in half with these two hands, the dirty sneak! He broke into a run, convulsed with fury. Rat-rat-tat-tat-stumbled, staggered, fell. He moaned, 'tMurder my dame, will he? I'll kill with my-hands-dirty- WILLIAM EDYVIN CUTLER, '3O. :Qi Q W E Z I V fi uf X If X .-57, ff to A F