New Jersey Agricultural College - Four Leaf Clover Yearbook (New Brunswick, NJ)

Page 108 text:

Classified A ds-Continued. WANTED. WANTED.-A fountain pen that will not freeze up in the Auditorium. 200 orders may be secured immediately by any iirnz producing same at any price. WANT1il,J.-A proressor who knows near- ly as much, about things in general, as Platt. WAN'lll:lD.-A detective, to do special ser' vice in the Apple Laboratory. Address Prof. Schieferstein. 1-'ok SALE.:A couple of smiths. Ad- dress the Horticulture Class, Short Course. WANTED.-A man to go down and in- spect Mr. Duncan's voice. WANTED.-Some comfortable beds to be used in the Insect Laboratory. Address Horticulture Class. WANTED.-A more sociable class of Do-- mestic Science Girls. Address E. B. Voorhees Society. PROF. CHAS. L. A. BECKERS. Demonstrator of Music at Seasonab1e Prices. Will guarantee to cultivate and make avail- able Students for Short Course Orchestra and Glee Clubs. Will gladly assist Stu- dents over the Bars of Music, and will fur- nish Lady Accompanist for each Beginner. Will supply bags for singers who can't hold notes and clocks for players who can't keep time. CNo Note Books Requiredj CFarm Experience not Essential. J CCall for Demonstration or write for Circular No. 23.5 Orchestra and Glee Club open to engage- ments. Equally pleasing at Farmers' Grange, County Demonstrations, Agricultural Socie- ties, or Cow Testing Associations. WANTED.-A Doctor. S. E. Sarson is seriously sick at his home at 142 George St. from the effects of a shock attained bv Mr. Hughes walking his lady friend home from Sunday School. WANTED.-Position as waiter. Have had experience in Highland Park residence waiting from 8.45 to 12.00 p. m. Ralph Robinson. Confidential Guide to the Course Theatre Poultry n Hello, Broadway L. R. Shelton Poor Little Thing J. D. Haddon u lt Pays to Advertise P. H. Maurer Daddy Long-Legs S. Glover Chin-Chin G. Dunn The Debutante I. A. Morrison A Pair of Silk Stockings B. Randall The Only Girl Miss Miller To-Night's the Night I. Gallagher A Mix-Up F. L. Lutthans u Dancing Around H. R. Vogel Kick-In L. Schreiber Watch Your Step C. N. Meyers The Silent Voice A. C. Davis Twin Beds ' B. Goldman and R. S. Reynolds Innocent ' E. A. Hechler Lady Luxury Mrs. Roydhouse On Trial H. Faucher Experience Messrs. Brett, Lewis and Thompson The Wars of the World Student Body and Faculty 107

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CLASSIFIED .'lDS-Continued. , WAN TED. WANTED. SOME ONE to inquire after the indiffer- ence of Wood and Richardson. INSTRUCTIONS in Typewriting. N. Meyer, INFORMATION leading to the mystery of the egg in Conklin's pocket. FACTS regarding the Happerset-Green- berger scrap. A Q TWO Farms, at any old price? at any old place, for S. B. Block and R. S.,Rey-- nolds. ' A COURSE in higher bookkeeping and accounting for Duffy. PUPILS in landscape gardening by Fitz- simmons. TO be in England when April's there - C. S. Grimwood. AN expert authority on cover crops. Ap- ply to either C. E. Brett or I. Gallagher. A NURSE wanted. Apply E. A. Heckler. SOME ONE to believe Shelton. A MAN. Mfrs. Roydhouse. VVILL pay high price for contrivance which will enable me to attend lectures without being there. Something on the style of Herman the Great preferred. W. Schmidt. TO have that last repeated. C. I. Eger- ton. SOME ONE to argue with C. I. McCarthy. 2000 Belles of jersey for my farm. E. Olesen. FOR use in the class room-a comfortable sofa. H. Chrystal. AN easy way to acquire knowledge with- out studying, and experience without work. Kindly send full particulars to Mrs. VVebb. WANTED.-Annextra supply of chairs on the front row in Miss Rogers' classes to accommodate the noisy and sleepy members. VVANTED.-Private secertary in conduct- ing large correspondence. An attractive young man, tall blond, is preferred. Short hours, one hour at noon. Apply to I-Ielen Welsh. JUST on 'the Market, the book How to Enjoy Life, by Helen Janeway and Ella I-Ialsted. ALL Modern Dances. Fashion's latest steps, Fox Trot, Tango, etc. Stage and classic. Expert instructor. Eulalia Mc- Fadden. For reference apply to Mrs. To- belman. WANTED.-Some sort of a brake to put on talking machines, Apply to Miss Rogers. INFORMATION Wanted.-How to check Mrs. Webb's appetite. A Concerned In- quirer. ' WANTS 48-hour days until February 20, instead of 24. Being so pressed for time. Apply to Mrs. Tobelman. VVANTEI3.-A formula with more than 75 elements. Address Prof. Blake. VVANTED.-A young lady stenographer or secretary. Must be very good-looking, and must be ready at all times with a smile. Address J. Percy Van Zandt. WANTED.-A tutor, to teach Mr. Promin- ski United States.

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Class Room Brevities and Favorite Sayings Parvin: Eh! Would you mind repeating that ? G. Layton: Ain't that the greatest ? Voss: 'Tis in the book. Why bother it? QI. R.. Perry: The cares of the world rest on his brow. Robinson: My life is full of weary days. Prof. Hoffman: ' All who come in after live minutes past the hour are counted absent. Bonnell Cwho has just come inj : Am I absent, Professor ? Prof. Farley: What causes a tree with a wire around the trunk to grow larger above the wire than below it ? H. M. Smith: The sap goes up and stays all summer. Brookstein: l:'rofessor, I do not think there is an equilibrium between the roots and the top of this tree. Mr. Schermerhorn: To-day, boys, we will take those new forks and turn that pile of manure. Student Cafter looking in cupboard where forks are keptj 1 They aren't there. Mr. Schermerhorn: They were delivered there only a minute ago. Well, l was a boy once. We will finish glazing the sash to-day. G. E. Layton fat close of roll callj : Which Layton did you mark absent? Prof. App: Which Layton is absent? Bright Student: Mr, Layton. Prof. Lewis: Is that the right answer ? Chorus: Sure! Yes. Prof. Lewis: All right: this isn't cheering practice. Vogel Cas Maurer sits on thumb tackj : Get off that thumb tack: it's the only one I've got. 108