New Harmony High School - Jester Yearbook (New Harmony, IN)

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T H E J E S T E R New Harmony, Indiana El ----------'-----'-----x-'---1------'-I------------'---'-'----- --------------------------------1----------------------- ---'--f--- EI Class Prophecq ELEN KUYKENDALL and Pauline Henderson had planned to spend an evening together to study for a Botany exam the next day. Pauline, out of breath and excited, ran into Helen's house gasping, Really, I thought I'd never get away. You know, Helen, it's so difficult to make Mother understand how we must study together. Helen sighing, Oh, Pauline, don't you wish we were smart? Do I! You know I do. Let's see now. What are the stages of de- velopment of plants? Say, Polly, did you get your New Harmony Times today? Didn't you? Well, here is something about the marvelous class of '22. Gee, they sure were wonders. Let's look at their pictures in the an- nual as we talk of their noble deeds. Of course, you have an annual. Helen, scornfully, t'One! One! Why, Pauline, I have a dozen anyway. Mother did so want me to be like any one of that class. They were so brilliant, each and every one has some special calling. I remember they used to speak to me sometimes, 'Greater than the greatestf Pauline, I couldn't realize then, I was too young. Pauline, thoughtfully, The teachers should have some credit, too. You know they associated with them every day and must have absorbed some of their noble spirit. Miss Phebus was really almost equal to the Seniors. She knew quite a lot. The Seniors knew so much. She mem- orized eight English books backwards and forwards and knew all classics required in four years of high school. She always read all the books pub- lished. But very few can compare with her own literature. Helen, sadly, How this High School has deteriorated! Miss Plummer has also given up her position as teacher. I suppose the teachers were rather uplifted because of that Senior class. But how nice it would have been if they could have helped us a little. Now she is a farmerette and doctor. She is helping dumb animals and has started a humane society. t'Mr. Lindley has at last realized his one great ambition-to be at the head of a teachers' association. He introduces a new system of teaching every week all over the country. The latest is called 'Dumb Bellesf It is quite popular, especially with the teachers. Miss French is using this new system very successfully. In her spare time she plays for medicine shows. You have heard her, Helen, I know you have. 'tPauline, did you know Miss Vardaman cooks for the President now, and all because of her fame as one of the teachers of '22'? She also makes all his clothes and is his docto1'. She is quite a notable at the White House. tOh! Ilelen, do you remember how Mr. Hecketsweiler condescended to lead us around town on Armistice Day? He has followed his true calling and has been made a general in the United States army. Such discipline as he must have! Why, Helen, you know he could just look at the students 'ind they would witherfl Obi do hurry, turn over quickly! You remember when the Postmaster General resigned, the position was offered Miss Armstrong and she refused because she hardly thought 'nw 'Q ........ EJ 1 1 i 1

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T H E' J E S T E R New Harmony, Incliaim El -----------------------------------'-----'---------------------- -.-------------1------------------.-------.-------.---------------A El it worth while? The President came down to see her and she finally con- sented after much persuasion. She sure is a wonder, just think of it! Helen, speaking hurriedly, Oh, Pauline, just think what Gerald is now. He has so far outclassed Wallace Reid that he, I mean Mr. Reid, has lost his job. Gerald has organized a company called 'Ucumsemeef Dur- ing his spare time he is Governor of California. Of course, being Governor is a good advertisement, but it looks like he would devote all of his time to the movies. And Paulinus Lawless is a second Lincoln, they say when people hear him orate they are struck dumb. He is running against Lida Frieg for the presidency. I really don't know which I prefer, do you, Pauline? You know Lida was such a success as Secretary of War and Paulinus is such an orator. I really can't decide, can you? Helen, here's Charles Given, he is that famous well digger. When anyone wants him to dig a well, he just takes an easy chair and sits down beside the place for the well and the well digs itself. Marvelous, isn't it! Did you see his picture in the 'Hobo's Daily' as the fastest runner in the United States? In this same paper his engagement was announced. Poor Charles! He has had a difficult time trying to cope with the opposing factor. But he succeeded at last. I do hope he'll be happy and live a peace- ful life. This paper in which Charles' engagement was announced is edited by Leslie Steelman. He is an inventor, too. He has invented a device by which he may sleep and read in comfort. How inconsiderate the faculty was to make Mr. Steelman remain at his desk and sleep ! t'Mary Wade was the originator of bobbed hair. You know, Helen, I just couldn't resist having my hair bobbed, Mary looked so nice, I hoped to look like her. Helen, sympathetically, t'I'm so sorry, Pauline, you don't show it. Let's study General Science awhile. It is so hard. I hate to study Botany: it gives me such a headache. All right, let's do. But say, Helen, did you read about Miss Wade's engagement? Isn't it thrilling to think both of them come from New Harmony '? g Pauline, reminiscently, Glenn Bailey was the captain of the B. B. team then. They surely had a wonderful team. He also has originated a device which does all muscular labor for him. He has also produced a record which will answer all questions shot at it, no matter how difficult or foolish they are. Pauline, speaking with awed reverence. f'Ohl Helen, can't you just see Roy as he used to walk around the assembly? Wouldn't he have been wonderful in the movies! But, Helen, you know his calling is far nobler: he is a missionary to Hawaii. His work must be so inspiring. Say, Helen, what does this picture make you think of? Pauline pointed to Jennie Kemmerling's picture. ' Why,4that just reminds me. Mother left us some cakes and sand- wiches. Wait a minute until I get them. Miss Kemmerling is such a wonderful cook. She can make delicious soup from any kind of pebbles. She conducts the United States Food De- partmentf' Say, Pauline, let's try that new device originated by Myron Cox. With this wonderful machine one may study while he sleeps. Oh! of course. E1......... ............................ E1 Page Nineteen