Mount Vernon High School - Forum Yearbook (Mount Vernon, OH)

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THE FORUM 29 I caught these lovely maids in mid-air and brought them with me. Their names are Ruth Mitchell and Helen Chew. Then jealous Hera spoke out quickly, I surely will have to keep my eyes on Zeus now! But what about the two de- baters? Their argument was so heated that it kept them above water. They were floating along shaking their fists and screaming at each other when I saw them last. I move we drive them to a wild and desolate shore and let them teach debating to the wild beasts there. What think you of that plan? A noble brain for vengeance you have, my noble Hermes. And now but one remains and she deserves an awful fate. She has tried to make the people laugh but how completely she has failed -alas! is all too plain. Send her to a place where she will be compelled to do this always. But I must be going, I've an ap- pointment With Cupid in twenty-five sec- onds, so, good-bye, I'm oif. Then everyone seemed to have departed and a grewsome silence fell about me, I suddenly arose with a start. Had I been dreaming had it really been the gods whom I had heard talking? I really could not settle in my mind what it had been until I reached home four months later and heard that great scandal still noised abroad that Anita Wrentzel had gone with the circus and then I knew it was all too true. Alas! what fate awaits some of my classmates! I is 'A -- E , 'Tim m :YVYYIYYYVWV - , 1 ll' i -I ZOE 1 S V 505 E 93 i I ' I V el? glp 1 Y ' 4-'Z A - fi. , I .A-11 1:1-1 ,Ia ,,,,,. zxilw wm- I ig- , . in 1 - 4. ' N fn fl!! 3' l nr ln. Vw! Xxx 'll .' s ,: .sg ,-3,1 v . -,.' -5 Q 1 - .U IH: , - --, ,x , ,- ,, . - .:.ftg.yg..-,::.. ' 12. mu 1 ' 350.9541 A I 1 ' 23402 -'Z ,, . B. Jazz, ngf Q'

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28 THE FORUM tired of this. Let 's let the rest drift as best they can. I'm going driving. Now, before you go there are one or two little points which must be settled. All right, but hurry up. Give me a couple to dispose of 5 I'll do it up in fine style. Very well, there 's Grace Strang, what about her? Oh, that's easy. She 'll be married in two or three months and will be driven insane by her nine children. Iim tired of being kind to these people, they don 't ap- preciate it when you are. Then she'll be left a widow. Black is very becoming to her, don't you know. That ought to console her. I think you rc mean. You aren't nice to the girls at all. But they can always count on me to help them. I've a great idea . Now, there 's that Frances Chew, she is crazy about Domestic Science. She will invent a new auto paro domees, a great machine which not only mixes and cooks all food and does all the sweeping and dusting but also feeds and clothes the people. That will simplify matters a little. I think I'll get one joke at least out of this, said the deformed Hephaestus. Ethel Simmons has been making a tour through Bangs, Hunt Station and Mar- tinsburg where she has been collecting material for a book entitled Personal Experiences in Extensive Travelling in America, which will be published next June. Then, too, there 's Anita Wrentzel, she will fall in love with one of the lion- tamers in F orepaugh and Sell's circus, run away and become a famous bareback rider. That's enough for you, Hephaetus. You haven't got sense enough to- I guess I'1l get one of the fellows too. I've kept still all this time while you've been trying to marry them all off and now I'm going to do as I please. Ralph Jen- kins can shock the natives of Mt. Vernon by starting a poker joint and will become a rival to J. D. Rockefeller with all the millions he gains. Does that satisfy you? No, it doesn't, but then that's all the good it does. You'd ruin all mankind if you could. I tell you I'm going to have one learned person out of this class. Har- vard will be in great need of a Latin pro- fessor in 1914 and one of the eminent members, renowned far and wide for his great wisdom, oratorical genius and knowledge of Latin,-John Gotshall,- will fill the place and rise to even greater prominence on account of his wonder- ful ability. He will- Then was heard a great roaring, whir- ring and rushing followed by sounds as of a great confusion. A voice broke out: Well, what under heaven is the mat- ter with you, Hermes, and what is it you have with you? Oh, it 's too horrible for words. As I was flying in the clouds above the ocean I saw one of these new seven-passenger aeroplanes invented by a fellow by the name of West coming across above the water filled with pretty girls. There were six of them and the driver, whom I rec- organized as Dean McKee. Suddenly two of them got into a very heated argument as to whether skirts were to be two yards around the bottom or three. Coming closer I perceived they were the renowned debaters Faye Thomas and Besse Patter- son. The debate waxed more fierce 'till they came to blows when alas! in the midst of the first combat when Besse made a fierce lunge at Faye, over went the whole thing and all the pretty girls were dumped into the sea. Poor Olive Snow and Jennie Hildebrand were drowned but I've turned them into mermaids.

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- 1 l J I I 1 1 ' 1 l I S I l 1 l THE FORUM L. C. PENN SELLS PIANOS. ORGANS, SEWING MACHINES, I TALKING MACHINES, J EVVELRY, AND EVERYTHING IN MUSIC. 14 S. MAIN STREET BIT. VERNON, OHIO I Perfect fitting, correct styles, all-wool fabrics, hand- I made, in fact Faultless Clothes are what you get at EMERS ON 'S I Call and examine our goods and compare with others. If you are particular about having your clothes and fixings correct, you will be more than pleased. You I will be satisfied. You are welcome to look. I ROE EMERSON ' 104 S. Main Street Mt. Vernon, Ohio ' 9 9 Spltzer s Shoes McNabb S I will please 9 H G R O C E R Y , He s lookmg for you Good things to ear --un The best to be had I I I South Main Street Corner Main and Gambier Streets I